The Utah 2011 Football Thread

[kccougar]

"Wynn: Healthy, ready to go. Despite reports out there his shoulder is great. The best thing they have done is limited his throwing to avoid chronic soreness. There is no soreness. Plan all along was to stagger practices, etc to limit his reps."

If the plan all along was to stagger practices you'd think they would have said that all along instead of that the plan was to keep him on a pitch count.

[LA Ute]

In the 80's Utah had some really sweet kickers. A guy named Andre Guardi who looked like John Travolta, and a guy named Wayne Lammle whose red afro was so large that it filled the entire frame of his roster photo. In those days, games weren't close enough to be decided by kickers, so no one really knew how good those guys were.

Then sometime in the early 90's, Ron McBride received an Unsigned Letter that placed a curse on Utah's kicking game for 10 years. I am not making this up. Being a man of sound mind, proper judgement, and also being more than 50% clinically insane, Ron McBride believed the Unsigned Letter, which gave the Unsigned Letter great power.

The list of kicking issues during the Reign of the Unsigned Letter is long and distinguished, but I think the absolute pinnacle was when a kicker named Golden Freaking Whetman couldn't find his helmet when it was time for him to enter the game and kick a field goal. He couldn't find his freaking helmet. He lost his helmet. Also, he complained that there were no orange slices at halftime. Jeez.

Finally, in about 2003 the 10 year curse was lifted, and the power of the Unsigned Letter faded into darkness. Things have been pretty good since then.

Heaven help us all if the Unsigned Letter finds the will to return.

I have been told that in order to lift the curse forever, some type of ritual/ceremony needs to be celebrated. A certain former Kicker Who Must Not Be Named (initials R.K.) must participate, and so must Ron McBride. I understand, but am not sure, that the ritual won't involve driving a stake through anyone's heart.

[LA Ute]

If the plan all along was to stagger practices you'd think they would have said that all along instead of that the plan was to keep him on a pitch count.

Oh, ye of little faith.

[kccougar]

I understand, but am not sure, that the ritual won't involve driving a stake through anyone's heart.

I assume the act would need to be carried out by a Utah fan. Turnabout is fair play.

[Jarid in Cedar]

I assume the act would need to be carried out by a Utah fan. Turnabout is fair play.

I volunteer.

[BoylenOver]

Dan Beardall was the kicker in 2005, and didn't do too bad.

Bryan Borreson will forever be hailed as the only player to score in the 2003 game at BYU.

And nevermind the awful misses, Chris Yergensen will never have to buy a drink in Salt Lake because of 34-31.

[LA Ute]

This is well done:

[YOUTUBE]m5lhsKzRvCw&feature=player_embedded[/YOUTUBE]

[tooblue]

This is well done:

[YOUTUBE]m5lhsKzRvCw&feature=player_embedded[/YOUTUBE]

Cheesy.

[LA Ute]

Cheesy.

It's not designed for artistes like you. This is FOOTBALL we're talking about here, son!

[UtahDan]

Cheesy.

I'm glad I watched it first before seeing this comment so that I at least felt excited for about 20 seconds before reading this and realizing how lame I am.

[tooblue]

I'm glad I watched it first before seeing this comment so that I at least felt excited for about 20 seconds before reading this and realizing how lame I am.

All I could think of was, "all that for Montana State?"

[PaloAltoCougar]

It's not at all bad, until the ending when, with the sledgehammer/percussion audio overlay, they flash up "Montana State." Instantly one's football boner goes a bit flaccid.

[UtahDan]

It's not at all bad, until the ending when, with the sledgehammer/percussion audio overlay, they flash up "Montana State." Instantly one's football boner goes a bit flaccid.

I'm archiving this for your entire month of November, jerk!

[LA Ute]

All I could think of was, "all that for Montana State?"

Look at if from our perspective: Utah sports marketing actually did an advertisement (!!!) and they did it for only a single game (!!!!!). And it was not horrible (!!!!!!), notwithstanding your and PAC's (worthless) opinions to the contrary. This may be unprecedented.

[OrangeUte]

Football boner. Oh my PAC - that's Classic. As for the Montana State at the end - fantasize that saying USC, Washington, UCLA, etc., instead, and that flaccidity will reverse itself.