Latest Stats and Facts on Punography

[Babs]

Also, I was sharing a female perspective--what might go through the mind of a wife who discovers her husband has a porn addiction. It was not necessarily an argument as to why porn is bad.

Porn, like sexual intimacy, arouses feelings and emotions that some women would prefer their husbands save only for them. It can feel like a betrayal. It can make her feel insecure. Your NBA and GC comparisons are ridiculous.

Exactly. Neither Soup nor I were discussing porn in general, nor were we discussing marital intimacy in general. We were trying to answer a specific question regarding why women react to the thought of a husband's porn interest they way that they do.

I'd like to add something that I considered mentioning yesterday:

The truth is that, like someone here suggested, unless a man has a pre-marital obsession with porn, a man in a healthy marriage is not likely to fall into a secret porn addiction. It's much more likely that a husband is going to get involved with porn when a wife is sexually negligent.

So I do think that the reasons Soup and I mentioned earlier are true. But a lot of times in addition to the sense of betrayal, there's an enormous sense of guilt and shame for many women who stumble onto a husband's porn stash. The very fact that he turned to porn implicates her. The discovery is a material confirmation of what she already knew deep within -- that she's not meeting his needs. And that's why women go postal when they find their men with porn -- they didn't want to have to face the truth of their own shortcomings.

[Fiyero]

Also, I was sharing a female perspective--what might go through the mind of a wife who discovers her husband has a porn addiction. It was not necessarily an argument as to why porn is bad.

Porn, like sexual intimacy, arouses feelings and emotions that some women would prefer their husbands save only for them. It can feel like a betrayal. It can make her feel insecure. Your NBA and GC comparisons are ridiculous.

I don't know if it was Jay Santos' intent but the "expectations" element is a common theme in the endless barrage of Priesthood talks and lessons on the subject. When the lecturer explains the reasons why porn is a no-no, it is often said that it warps the mind due to fantasy-like images. There is an assumption that guys are too stupid to know it isn't reality. They say that porn ruins marriages, yet I wonder why Twilight, chick flicks and Hollywood aren't mentioned in the same concept.

[Babs]

I don't know if it was Jay Santos' intent but the "expectations" element is a common theme in the endless barrage of Priesthood talks and lessons on the subject.

These lessons are taught by men, yes?

[Fiyero]

Usually.

[marsupial]

I don't know if it was Jay Santos' intent but the "expectations" element is a common theme in the endless barrage of Priesthood talks and lessons on the subject. When the lecturer explains the reasons why porn is a no-no, it is often said that it warps the mind due to fantasy-like images. There is an assumption that guys are too stupid to know it isn't reality. They say that porn ruins marriages, yet I wonder why Twilight, chick flicks and Hollywood aren't mentioned in the same concept.

I haven't seen Twilight. Do many women beat off when they watch/read it?

[ERCougar]

I haven't seen Twilight. Do many women beat off when they watch/read it?

So is porn okay as long as you don't masturbate?

[ERCougar]

Sometimes I think the "expectations" thing is ridiculous. Men shouldn't look at porn because their wife might feel inadequate or the wife might feel like she can't live up to porn star expectations?

Should my wife not watch GC because she now might think my spirituality is inadequate? Should my son not watch the NBA playoffs because he might start feeling inadequate about his BB skills? Seriously, this is a ridiculous argument.

LOL...I think this is a funny point. I'm not sure the analogy totally holds, but point well made anyway.

[Babs]

I haven't seen Twilight. Do many women beat off when they watch/read it?

wait. Why would we? Men whack off because their primary drive is sexual. They seek materials that feed that drive. Women's primary drive is for security and emotional support, so they seek materials that feed that fantasy.

Fiyero has a good point that the one is no better than the other, if you're using it to create unrealistic ideals, or using it as a replacement for or escape from what should exist in the marriage.

[jay santos]

Also, I was sharing a female perspective--what might go through the mind of a wife who discovers her husband has a porn addiction. It was not necessarily an argument as to why porn is bad.

Porn, like sexual intimacy, arouses feelings and emotions that some women would prefer their husbands save only for them. It can feel like a betrayal. It can make her feel insecure. Your NBA and GC comparisons are ridiculous.

My NBA and GC comparisons are perfect as they relate to the stated reason for being against porn as one of feeling low self esteem for not meeting expectations.

But the reason you state above is a very valid reason. "Porn, like sexual intimacy, arouses feelings and emotions that some women would prefer their husbands save only for them. It can feel like a betrayal. It can make her feel insecure."

[ERCougar]

As of 2002, 61% of women preferred a female OBGYN:

Determinants of Women's Choice of Obstetrician/Gynecologist
Zuckerman M, Navizedeh N, Feldman J, McCalla S, Minkoff H
J Womens Health Gend Based Med. 2002;11:175-180

That's asking them to state one preference or the other, though.

When you allow the option of "no preference," then 35% prefer women, 7% prefer men, and the others have no preference.

I prefer white doctors.

[Babs]

I prefer white doctors.

I prefer doctors with MDs.

[jay santos]

I don't know if it was Jay Santos' intent but the "expectations" element is a common theme in the endless barrage of Priesthood talks and lessons on the subject. When the lecturer explains the reasons why porn is a no-no, it is often said that it warps the mind due to fantasy-like images. There is an assumption that guys are too stupid to know it isn't reality. They say that porn ruins marriages, yet I wonder why Twilight, chick flicks and Hollywood aren't mentioned in the same concept.

General Conference warps the mind because my wife thinks my FHE lessons should be on par with Elder Bednar's talks.

[wuapinmon]

While I love RF's overall perspective on marriage, I would not be comfortable with any kind of extra-marital sex without prior consent. My partner and I have discussed the possibility of inviting others into our activities (Maybe someday, but I think we agree that it's too emotionally risky, although she did point out one of her friends to me last night with a nudge and a wink), but I think any kind of affair without this kind of consent has no place in a committed relationship and is likely to destroy trust. I know I would find it very difficult to stay in the relationship were I to discover infidelity, and I assume she feels the same. Perhaps I'm not the most liberal among us on this issue after all.

Threesome bragging?
[YOUTUBE]
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[ERCougar]

I think lower GI specialists (often called proctologists) have it worse.

Colorectal surgery is actually one of the more competitive surgical subspecialties to get into...Money makes a lot of things bearable.

[Color Me Badd Fan]

Usually.

I'd like to see the nitty-gritty GC porn talks handed off to Julie Beck.

I'm also trying to do my part to make this thread eventually overtake the Lakers thread.