I learned in church today

[byu71]

I learned that when you run interference for the Bishop, you tend to tick off the more highly sensitive members.

Do you find those who get ticked off easiest are the "extremely active" members or those in the mid range to "barely active".

I don't know if either group has the more sensitive personality, just curious.

[pellegrino]

I learned that when you run interference for the Bishop, you tend to tick off the more highly sensitive members.

sounds juicy. need more details.

[BYUMizzou]

Do you find those who get ticked off easiest are the "extremely active" members or those in the mid range to "barely active".

I don't know if either group has the more sensitive personality, just curious.

I ticked off one of each yesterday. We have 3 couples in our ward who have marriages that are on the rocks. Yesterday I knew the Bishop was meeting with all 3 couples, and that he would probably be in interviews during SS, Priesthood, and for probably 3 or 4 hours after the block.

A lady showed up who only shows up once every few months when she wants welfare assistance. I told her the bishop wouldn't be able to see her today, but that she should meet with the ward financial specialist, who was available, and he would schedule a meeting for her with the Bishop if he thought one was warranted. She left after refusing to meet with the financial specialist.

The other lady whose feathers got ruffled was the 14 and 15 y.o. sunday school teacher. She routinely kicks 2 or 3 kids out of class every week. I have daughters in the class who fill me in on why they get kicked out. Yeah, they're slightly disruptive, but nothing earthshattering you wouldn't expect from a class of teenagers. Unless you sit there with your arms folded and raise your hand every time before speaking, you get the boot out of the class. Yesterday she sent 3 kids "to the Bishop's office" for being disruptive. I told them the Bishop didn't have time to meet with them and sent them back to class. She refused to let them back in and then came and yelled at me for not backing her up.

[byu71]

I ticked off one of each yesterday. We have 3 couples in our ward who have marriages that are on the rocks. Yesterday I knew the Bishop was meeting with all 3 couples, and that he would probably be in interviews during SS, Priesthood, and for probably 3 or 4 hours after the block.

A lady showed up who only shows up once every few months when she wants welfare assistance. I told her the bishop wouldn't be able to see her today, but that she should meet with the ward financial specialist, who was available, and he would schedule a meeting for her with the Bishop if he thought one was warranted. She left after refusing to meet with the financial specialist.

The other lady whose feathers got ruffled was the 14 and 15 y.o. sunday school teacher. She routinely kicks 2 or 3 kids out of class every week. I have daughters in the class who fill me in on why they get kicked out. Yeah, they're slightly disruptive, but nothing earthshattering you wouldn't expect from a class of teenagers. Unless you sit there with your arms folded and raise your hand every time before speaking, you get the boot out of the class. Yesterday she sent 3 kids "to the Bishop's office" for being disruptive. I told them the Bishop didn't have time to meet with them and sent them back to class. She refused to let them back in and then came and yelled at me for not backing her up.

So the common thread is they are women.

[Sullyute]

The other lady whose feathers got ruffled was the 14 and 15 y.o. sunday school teacher. She routinely kicks 2 or 3 kids out of class every week. I have daughters in the class who fill me in on why they get kicked out. Yeah, they're slightly disruptive, but nothing earthshattering you wouldn't expect from a class of teenagers. Unless you sit there with your arms folded and raise your hand every time before speaking, you get the boot out of the class. Yesterday she sent 3 kids "to the Bishop's office" for being disruptive. I told them the Bishop didn't have time to meet with them and sent them back to class. She refused to let them back in and then came and yelled at me for not backing her up.

I remember when I was 12 or 13 we had a pretty rough group of kids. We went thru 2 or 3 "temporary" sunday school teachers in less than 2 months. We gained quite a reputation. They finally called an ex-green beret and the father of one of the more rowdy kids to be our teacher. We settled down after he threw chalk erasers at offending kids.

Either way shouldn't the teacher be sending the kids to see the Sunday School President? Heck he needs something to do to justify his calling.

[OldUte]

I learned that the Roman empire fell due to homosexuality and that we need to learn from history or we will will repeat it.

That one's almost as rich as the pre-Columbian horses being fed by Ammon.

[TripletDaddy]

Missionary homecoming today. Elder went to BA, Argentina.

He asked for forgiveness because he "forgot how to speak English."

He has been home for 3 weeks.

[The_Tick]

Missionary homecoming today. Elder went to BA, Argentina.

He asked for forgiveness because he "forgot how to speak English."

He has been home for 3 weeks.

Lamest line ever.

I have learned that you can golf at any course in Utah on a Sunday without a tee time.

And rates are pretty good too.

[byu71]

Missionary homecoming today. Elder went to BA, Argentina.

He asked for forgiveness because he "forgot how to speak English."

He has been home for 3 weeks.

I have heard this at several homecomings. Perhaps this could be replacing the "best two years of my life" line.

[Slim]

I learned that as long as you pay your tithing, you can write checks you know will overdraw your account because checks will soon arrive anonymously in the mail to make up the difference.

[Omaha 680]

My branch council/PEC meetings run at least 90 minutes, usually and hour and 45. We haven't hit 2 hours...yet.

[DU Ute]

Missionary homecoming today. Elder went to BA, Argentina.

He asked for forgiveness because he "forgot how to speak English."
He has been home for 3 weeks.

Spoiler for Warning! Bad word!:

Warning! Bad word!

[YOUTUBE]m_mDTLphIVY[/YOUTUBE]

[Portland Ute]

New bishopric this week.

[Scorcho]

I've learned that because of this thread I am paying more attention to each and every detail uttered in church meetings. Our bishop advised us not to wear shorts or "wife beaters" to an upcoming fellowshiping shindig. Our first counsler then added it would be okay if non members wore "wife beaters", because they dont know better.

[TripletDaddy]

Guy was in town visiting his parents this week. He works on a cruise ship overseeing the HazMat disposal, amongst other things. He asked us if we knew what happened to w.a.s.t.e. when we flushed the toilet on a cruise ship.

I have never been on a cruise ship so I obviously couldn't raise my hand in good conscience. Turns out that the toilets all flow into a large vat. That vat disburses w.a.s.t.e. into a centrifuge, which results in a dried out, flaky mass. That dried out, flaky mass is then burned in a large incinerator, resulting in large plumes of smoke that are emitted out of the ship's smokestack.

So the next time you see a cruise ship smokestack chugging out smoke, it is only just burning poo.

In all honesty, one of the most interesting things I have learned in Church in a long time.