I learned in church today

[calicoug]

Wait?! People are still using the paper cups? Correlation my eye!

Sure. But under my plan, you could bring anything from frosted mugs to thermos to a keg that a helpful Elder could tap. I'm just sayin.

[HuskyFreeNorthwest]

And the thought that some teacher not only just touched, but squished that morsel between his almost certainly unwashed fingers didn't ruin the experience?

In my church it is the priests that rip the sacrament bread, I guess that silly correlation thing so many here whine about is dying away!

[myboynoah]

In my church it is the priests that rip the sacrament bread, I guess that silly correlation thing so many here whine about is dying away!

LOL. ER has been going to some crazy offshoot Mormon church where they let teachers rip the bread apart. No wonder he complains so much.

[SoCalCoug]

LOL. ER has been going to some crazy offshoot Mormon church where they let teachers rip the bread apart. No wonder he complains so much.

Yeah, everyone knows Teachers don't have the authority to rip bread. It says so right there in D&C 84, somewhere.

[kimchicoug]

Apparently the Nephite monetary system was mentioned in the Book of Mormon so we would know to base our money on the gold standard. The elderly brother bore is testimony of this so it must be true.

This was followed by his friend who, when asked how he knows he is doing "the right," responded, "Well, I ask my liberal dem friends and I do the opposite of whatever the say." This was greeted with a lot of laughing and approval. It looks like the hardest part of choosing the right is finding another liberal in my ward.

[San Juan Sun]

It looks like the hardest part of choosing the right is finding another liberal in my ward.

Or just do the exact opposite of what you normally do. It worked for Costanza.

[Indy Coug]

Apparently the Nephite monetary system was mentioned in the Book of Mormon so we would know to base our money on the gold standard. The elderly brother bore is testimony of this so it must be true.

I thought it was simply trying to provide context for how much Zeezrom was throwing at Alma and Amulek to change their story.

[kimchicoug]

I thought it was simply trying to provide context for how much Zeezrom was throwing at Alma and Amulek to change their story.

You must be one of the "intellectuals" they were also warning me about.

[Indy Coug]

You must be one of the "intellectuals" they were also warning me about.

LOL. I've been told repeatedly I'm a mullah.

[Moliere]

LOL. I've been told repeatedly I'm a mullah.

I've called you a mullah, but I've seen a drastic change in Indy over the past 6-12 months. I'm beginning to think you are now a closet apostate. I could be wrong, but chances are I'm not.

[Indy Coug]

I've called you a mullah, but I've seen a drastic change in Indy over the past 6-12 months. I'm beginning to think you are now a closet apostate. I could be wrong, but chances are I'm not.

No man knows my story.

[Northwestcoug]

No man knows my story.

[Green Monstah]

I learned that sometimes new people don't like to have questions asked of them in their first gospel doctrine class (brand new ward, thought it would be good to ask them a few questions so people can get to know them better). The dude scowled at me the rest of class.

[sparky]

Speaking of being scowled at, I had the spiritual thought in PH opening exercises. I shared the gospel lesson found in Groundhog Day, which my son was watching earlier that morning. Some of the crusties seemed to be pretty unhappy and actually made me a little nervous.

[Paperback Writer]

In my church it is the priests that rip the sacrament bread, I guess that silly correlation thing so many here whine about is dying away!

In my ward, it's the teachers who bring the bread and the back-up bread in case the first guy forgets. Yesterday, both forgot and an advisor had to run home (or to the nearby 7-11) to get a loaf. There's been several times that I've been notified as we get into the car to go to church that my teacher-aged son has the bread assignment and we have to stop at a grocery store on the way to church.

The best bread ever award has to be when one of the teacher's had a beehive sister who baked bread for every fast Sunday. That was great bread - we always looked forward to it. It lasted about six months - I think it was part of her YW of promise project.

I lobbied the YW president to make Fast Sunday baked bread a YW assignment. My reasoning was that if the Deacons and Teachers had to collect FO for a few hours Sunday morning, the YW could bake bread for a few hours on Saturday. The YW president replied that that would require mothers to assist with the bread baking. I replied that the Deacons and Teachers do not drive themselves on their FO routes - it requires fathers to assist. We have not had home-baked sacrament bread since.