Random Thoughts Thread

[Clark Addison]

Does the company CEO go out of his way to squat in a bathroom that other employees don't use so they can't spread weird rumors about him and whether or not his deposits do not exceed the BYU71 odor threshold?

What kind of CEO worth his salt doesn't have his own bathroom?

[happyone]

something my 2 yr old grandson told me yesterday.

"When I am a Doctor, I can touch the TV antenna."

[RobinFinderson]

I once got jumped and beaten. My nose was smashed so flat it needed to be reconstructed. No joke. I was a kid, going into my freshman year in HS. After the healing time had passed, the doctor unpacked the gauze from my nasal cavity. This was the most painful experience I can remember. The gauze just kept coming out, like a string of silk handkerchiefs coming out of a magician's pocket. For weeks, after that, my nose would make the most gigantic and disgusting boogers, looking something like a green yolk variation of a fertilized chicken egg, which I could shoot out of my nostrils like a shotgun when I covered the other nostril with my thumb.

[Surfah]

I have some of the worst gas I have ever had in my life right now. It's like nerve gas. I am even getting nauseous from it. And yet I am laughing inside and mortified all at once that someone will walk in my office.

[Donuthole]

New semester = new 10-pack of Uniball Gel Impact ink pens. My favorite!

Have you ever used a cello Superglide pen? Holy cow! Where have you been all my life, Superglide? I found this pen on the floor in the hall, and it is awesome.

[wuapinmon]

Have you ever used a cello Superglide pen? Holy cow! Where have you been all my life, Superglide? I found this pen on the floor in the hall, and it is awesome.

Cool, I will have to check those out! I've never seen them before.

[hostile]

Random statement heard in the ER today:
"So, do you still have your uterus?"
Maybe it seemed more humerus due to lack of sleep?

[I.J. Reilly]

Cathrine O'Hara has situs inversus with dextrocardia. Her internal organs are in a mirror position, making her heart on the right side of her lungs.

[RobinFinderson]

It seems that every couple of months there is an article about some library book being returned 45-100 years overdue. The story usually gives everyone involved a good laugh, and then the library forgives the overdue charge of thousands of dollars.

One thing I learned from service on my mission is that elderly people in old-folks-homes don't get many visitors. I think I am going to check out a book today with the intention of turning it in when I am a lonely senior citizen and no one will visit me. Surely the media attention will make me the most popular senior in the center! BSA motto: Be prepared!

[wuapinmon]

Cathrine O'Hara has situs inversus with dextrocardia. Her internal organs are in a mirror position, making her heart on the right side of her lungs.

Wow....cool.

[Lost Student]

Cathrine O'Hara has situs inversus with dextrocardia. Her internal organs are in a mirror position, making her heart on the right side of her lungs.

My coworker's wife has the same condition. From what I remember, he said the greatest danger with it is failing to diagnose appendicitus because it's on the opposite side.

I think it came up as a topic of conversation (as a general rule, I avoid conversation about coworkers' wives innards) because she was about to have a baby and her inversus caused some minor complications with childbirth. I think the foetus made her backwards intestines go wonky (even moreso than foeti typically do).

[Lost Student]

I have been working at my firm for about 20 months now and always wondered why my Outlook inbox folder never auto-archived. I looked at the auto-archive settings and confirmed that it was set to auto-archive every 14 days. I even clicked the "auto-archive now" button. It still would not auto-archive

Finally, I realized today that each folder has a setting for if that folder should be auto-archived according to default or custom settings or not at all. Of course, my inbox had been set to "not at all." After almost two years, my inbox was bloated to about 1.5GB. It took forever to open Outlook at the start of each day and even longer to search. I look forward to having an improved user experience with my reduced inbox size.

[Lost Student]

The admin at my firm keeps the break room well-stocked with snacks. Yesterday at a meeting in the conference room, one of the secretaries was picking all the pear Jelly Bellys out of the container. IMO pear is the best flavor there is.

She got about six or seven out before I commented that one shouldn't just pick out the best flavors out of the communal jar, but is obligated to nonselectively grab a bunch. You've got to take the popcorns with the watermelons. Apparently I was not serious enough in chastizing her because she sort of laughed and continued to pick out more pears.

I view this as a major breach of protocol. Agree or disagree?

At least now I know why I never see any pear Jelly Bellys.

[Donuthole]

The admin at my firm keeps the break room well-stocked with snacks. Yesterday at a meeting in the conference room, one of the secretaries was picking all the pear Jelly Bellys out of the container. IMO pear is the best flavor there is.

She got about six or seven out before I commented that one shouldn't just pick out the best flavors out of the communal jar, but is obligated to nonselectively grab a bunch. You've got to take the popcorns with the watermelons. Apparently I was not serious enough in chastizing her because she sort of laughed and continued to pick out more pears.

I view this as a major breach of protocol. Agree or disagree?

At least now I know why I never see any pear Jelly Bellys.

Perhaps I have a little TriplePapi in me (not that way, sickos!) but I don't like communal jars of candy, nuts, etc. especially when people are reaching their hands into the bowl or bag. Our firm has a "no hands" rule, which requires you to pour contents into a cup of bowl for consumption. I once went into the kitchen and caught the runner dipping his hand into the mondo-sized Doritos bag. He gave me a sheepish look, and, while no words were exchanged, the chastisement was palpable.

I actually prefer the individually packaged stuff, but I'll eat the communal stuff if I'm the first to open the bag or box.

[Lost Student]

Perhaps I have a little TriplePapi in me (not that way, sickos!) but I don't like communal jars of candy, nuts, etc. especially when people are reaching their hands into the bowl or bag. Our firm has a "no hands" rule, which requires you to pour contents into a cup of bowl for consumption. I once went into the kitchen and caught the runner dipping his hand into the mondo-sized Doritos bag. He gave me a sheepish look, and, while no words were exchanged, the chastisement was palpable.

I actually prefer the individually packaged stuff, but I'll eat the communal stuff if I'm the first to open the bag or box.

Did you do a good staredown for maximum chastisement effect?

You make a good point. When I started working here, the only communal jars I couldn't avoid were the Swedish Fish and Jelly Bellys. Now that I have been here longer, I don't worry about it too much. We're a pretty small firm so it doesn't bother as much as it would at a large firm.