Red Dead Redemption: BYU vs. Utah 2013

[smokymountainrain]

So your comeback is"or guy was worse"

Truth hurts. I'm sorry.

[Eddie]

So your comeback is"or guy was worse" This really is the JV squad.

We just know when it's time to admit that Riley Nelson with a broken back is no Max Hall with a separated shoulder.

Seriously - would you have traded Hays for broken Nelson?

[smokymountainrain]

Just a few of the things I'd like to see at the game...

BYU's offensive line be more like they were versus Texas and less like they were versus Virginia.

A Utah trick play, onside kick, or fake punt/kick that completely blows up in their faces.

No Utah first downs that come as a result of a 15 yard stupid penalty (late hit, unsportsmanlike, etc.) after the ball carrier has been stopped short of the first down marker or the pass has fallen incomplete.

No BYU penalties for illegal block in the back on a return.

Hill complete >50% of his passes.

Williams and Hill maintain their current positions in the national rushing statistics after this game's data has been added.

A TD for Williams...finally. And let's throw one in for Hoffman as well.

A BYU tight end catch a couple of passes. In the same game.

As long as we're talking about catching passes - how about no dropped passes?

KVN and Fua taking turns helping Wilson up off the grass after essentially every Utah pass.

And really - that is probably a good place to begin.

I'd like to see Hine get a few carries and a couple opportunities in the kick return game - just a couple.

Fua and Van Noy wreak havoc in the backfield, whether its against the QB or the RBs.

The middle of the defense shut down the inside run game. I'm pretty concerned about the inside given Hadley's absence and the possibility Jorgensen could play big minutes.

Taysom Hill make good decisions with the read option and in the pass game.

Taysom Hill to stay healthy.

BYU's offense to take care of the ball and BYU's defense to make some plays on the ball.

BYU's defensive backs to limit big plays in the pass game. They have to keep #6 in check.

Ultimately, I just want BYU to win the third game of the season.

[Moliere]

Come on, JL. It's not fair to bring UB5 smack over here since LA Ute is actually doing us a favor by only talking bad about us behind our backs.

On CS, he is lying for the Lord. It's a typical method used by older church members.

[Jeff Lebowski]

JiC is right, guys. There is no logical reason why we should have lost to Utah in some of those games. Clearly we beat ourselves.

[Dwight Schr-ute]

I'd like to see Hine get a few carries and a couple opportunities in the kick return game - just a couple.

Fua and Van Noy wreak havoc in the backfield, whether its against the QB or the RBs.

The middle of the defense shut down the inside run game. I'm pretty concerned about the inside given Hadley's absence and the possibility Jorgensen could play big minutes.

Taysom Hill make good decisions with the read option and in the pass game.

Taysom Hill to stay healthy.

BYU's offense to take care of the ball and BYU's defense to make some plays on the ball.

BYU's defensive backs to limit big plays in the pass game. They have to keep #6 in check.

Ultimately, I just want BYU to win the a third game of the season.

FIFY.

[Jarid in Cedar]

JiC is right, guys. There is no logical reason why we should have lost to Utah in some of those games. Clearly we beat ourselves.

Don't let the HCO know about this.

[Jeff Lebowski]

Don't let the HCO know about this.

[smokymountainrain]

Don't let the HCO know about this.

[wally]

Don't let the HCO know about this.

Seriously. BYU can handle losing Hadley, but not losing Hadley and Lebowski.

[Jarid in Cedar]

We just know when it's time to admit that Riley Nelson with a broken back is no Max Hall with a separated shoulder.

Seriously - would you have traded Hays for broken Nelson?

With your line last year? Probably Nelson. I am on my phone, so I can't search, but I think I commented on how many negative plays Riley turned into positive plays in last years game. Hays would have been killed. Same with Lark. Hill, who knows what he would have done.

[Blueintheface]

Now this is more like rivalry week!

[Cougarmandias]

The ultra-orthodox have a question: After this mock baptism, can a worthy temple recommend holder associate with the University of Utah?

We ultra-orthodox don't question.

[Jarid in Cedar]

Maybe in 2016 you'll have a decent team and you too can feel what it's like to have hopes of winning.

Huh? We are going to kick your ass this year.

[Cougarmandias]

Thanks for the advice, Dr. Freud. While you might wish that you had a team this year that would let you get excited about Saturday, you shouldn't be too disappointed with your current despair. Studies consistently show that depression and realism are pretty much the same thing.

Holy shit, BYU nation is out of their minds obsessed on this game Saturday. Comparisons have already been made by BYU players to the super bowl, Franchuk articles insisting that BYU REALLY needs to beat Utah this time, and more so than ever before a general electricity in the air around all the cougar faithful regarding the absolute need for a W in this particular game to validate their season.

Let me issue a very heartfelt warning: you are playing a dangerous game, cougars. Please, as a Utah fan well versed in obsession with a single game, in implore you to tone. it. down. Stay mellow. You have no idea the emotional low you are *potentially* setting yourselves up for. Sure, you may think: "but if we win it will be amazing!" Sorry if this is hard for you to hear, it won't.

Let me put it in an analogy you will understand: it is like looking forward to soft serve ice cream. After downing the cone you are left thinking: "WTF just happened?! I couldn't even still taste it after the 3rd bite, and now I am just going to get fat! I have no room left for a corndog now!" Trust us; we used to be where you are now. We know the emptiness that you are setting yourselves up for, and we want to spare you the heartache. You will probably ignore this warning, but you will not be able to claim now that we are callous. Peace.

P.S. A consolation prize for the emotional low that you are *potentially* setting yourselves up for is a better collective sense of humor per goatnapper’s theorem. Maybe that will help you cope.