Temple Recommend

[Pheidippides]

I do think that to have these kinds of conversations you also have to have some level of trust. Right now I trust my Bishop - and really all of the men in the Stake Presidency. I don't know that I know EXACTLY how they would react to every situation, but I've interacted with them enough and seem them in action enough to believe that they are very compassionate men who care about me. That makes a difference.

I trust my bishop, and I have had conversations with him, but not at the same time as the TR interview. That's by design.

[wuapinmon]

So your main objective wasn't in fact to get a recommend? That makes more sense.

That's cool that you had an understanding bishop and SP. That kind of thing is always a crap shoot. I recall a couple of years ago hearing about a young man who mentioned in his TR interview that he did not support Prop 8. His bishop refused to give him a recommend. I think that is rare, but it happens.

I'm not sure I agree with your view of it. I went there to get a temple recommend, in my mind, first and foremost. In order to do that, I have to be guileless about where I am in relation to the questions. Last night, he started out by asking me how I was doing health wise, since I've been struggling with migraines for the last two months (you might have noticed my frequent 3AM postings). That led into why I didn't ask for more blessings, which led into me explaining how I didn't have much faith in them because my dad had been blessed that he would be healed and go back to his calling as ward clerk all while he lay dying of a prion disease in the ICU. When I asked my former bishop about that his response was, "The blessing only comes true if it's in accord with the Lord's will." If that's the case, I countered, then why do we say that the priesthood is the power to act in God's name if really, all the stuff we say will happen is still left up to divine capriciousness/wisdom/however you want to put it. I explained these feelings to him, how I felt that it was all very coy of God to give us hope, but then not actually do what we're told will happen in the blessing, and how I didn't have much faith in them, and only really turned to them when I was at my wit's end, or because my wife begged me to get one, and I did it to make her feel better. He mentioned this talk by Elder Bednar: https://www.lds.org/broadcasts/artic...19-18?lang=eng and suggested I read it, hoping that it would bring me some peace of mind about why people aren't healed, mentioning that sometimes it's not that we don't have enough faith to be healed, but that we don't have enough faith to not be healed. That seems like double speak to me, but I'm going to read the talk because I said I would, and because I'm curious about whether there's something there that I haven't considered or seen before.

As for it being a crap shoot, I was open with my former bishop, but the spirit of those interviews was far more confrontational.

I certainly empathize with Wuap.

When I go in for a temple recommend interview, my goal is to walk away with a recommend. But, like Wuap, I also feel like it is an opportunity to ease my mind regarding whatever might be bothering me. I know they are all yes or no questions, but I think there is more gray than a black and white answer allows for. I think sometimes it is worth easing your mind that even though you aren't perfect, your efforts are recognized. My experience has been that more often than not we are our own harshest critics. And sometimes it's nice to have someone else say - "sure you aren't perfect, but you're doing OK."

There is a lot to that too. You're not Jesus, but he'll still invite you over to his house.

[Idon'tgnawonmywife]

I'm not sure I agree with your view of it. I went there to get a temple recommend, in my mind, first and foremost. In order to do that, I have to be guileless about where I am in relation to the questions. Last night, he started out by asking me how I was doing health wise, since I've been struggling with migraines for the last two months (you might have noticed my frequent 3AM postings). That led into why I didn't ask for more blessings, which led into me explaining how I didn't have much faith in them because my dad had been blessed that he would be healed and go back to his calling as ward clerk all while he lay dying of a prion disease in the ICU. When I asked my former bishop about that his response was, "The blessing only comes true if it's in accord with the Lord's will." If that's the case, I countered, then why do we say that the priesthood is the power to act in God's name if really, all the stuff we say will happen is still left up to divine capriciousness/wisdom/however you want to put it. I explained these feelings to him, how I felt that it was all very coy of God to give us hope, but then not actually do what we're told will happen in the blessing, and how I didn't have much faith in them, and only really turned to them when I was at my wit's end, or because my wife begged me to get one, and I did it to make her feel better. He mentioned this talk by Elder Bednar: https://www.lds.org/broadcasts/artic...19-18?lang=eng and suggested I read it, hoping that it would bring me some peace of mind about why people aren't healed, mentioning that sometimes it's not that we don't have enough faith to be healed, but that we don't have enough faith to not be healed. That seems like double speak to me, but I'm going to read the talk because I said I would, and because I'm curious about whether there's something there that I haven't considered or seen before.

Well, shite, if there never was another topic that didn't hit so close to home...

Granted, Wuap, I haven't exactly been in the exact same scenario (even vicariously) as your father, but I did read your linked devotional and hopefully have some hopefully equally inspired thoughts to share...or something, haha.

As you guys undoubtedly know from my brief postings, I do in fact have cerebral palsy - courtesy of 3 months prematurity at birth.

Fact is, I have received blessings (up until the past few years anyway) that promised that I would walk and run...in this life. Some I remember receiving as a kid (talking years 4-10 mostly) and some I don't (my father has recollected to me that these blessings started shortly after my birth and diagnosis - something that is documented in a journal I received at my baptism from my parents).

Eesh...just reading that talk by Bednar; faith not to be healed? Haha, at least you can say that covers all the bases! Really though, as I've aged with cerebral palsy, I do think I might know where ol' Ednar is coming from. Mainly because I remember something my physician of a father told me somewhat recently regarding death. "There are worse things than death," he said. Of course, I pressed him for what he meant, and he said something like this: "There are some disease states in this life to where death may very well be the preferred alternative."

Naturally, with my sense of humor, I countered him with "is cerebral palsy one of those said disease states?" He laughed, but you know I was certainly left with my thoughts on the matter for the rest of the day. After further reflection I came to the realization that my life dealing with cerebral palsy day-to-day, where every movement is met with some resistance, has more than prepared me for death. Do I seek death? Hells no. But experiencing life in this body has really impressed upon me at times the temporary nature of our lives on this earth. Hell, dad in another whit of physician wisdom also once told me "You know, jared, I'm surprised at the amount of days that the human body does work correctly.

Even with all that said, it still hit me like a shite ton of bricks a couple weeks back that "hey, my parents expected me to be friggin healed by now." In that moment, I sorta felt like a disappointment or you know, "what did or didn't I do....?" But, after that, I just kinda rolled with it (wheelchair puns lol!).

I'll close this lengthy reply by relating bit about my mother, who probably comes closest to your dad's story - at least in spirit. To make a long story short, neither of my parents grew up in good homes (sexual abuse galore!) and my mom had (and has) the unfortunate burden of inheriting a debilitating condition which closely mimics dementia at times; she's just in her mid 50's. Fact is, the downturn for her supposedly started even or just after I was born. If you were to ask me what my mom's personality is like, I honestly couldn't answer - too much consistent inconsistency there.

Anyway, the point is with my mom is that she sadly does recognize (at times) that she isn't all there, and understandably wishes for healing. It was not uncommon for me to hear her tell my father in days of yore "I don't know why God won't heal me, I don't think I've done anything wrong...I'm repenting, and from what, I don't even know." Woo. First time I heard that...can't tell you what that did to my insides.

So Imma try n summarize all this. Do I believe in the healing power of blessings? Fer shure...I've seen enough first-hand and vicariously to cement their effectiveness and power in my mind. Do I believe that there's a certain placebo involved with receiving a blessing? Probably, but in my mind, hey, whatever works. On a personal level, do I believe that I will be healed of my disability in this life? Can't say I know the answer to that, and while the jury's still out, I *can* say that I have reached a certain point of peace either way. Perhaps this is what Elder Maxwell was related to Bednar in regards to "not shrinking is better than surviving." For me though, not shrinking *is* surviving. Go figure.

Wuap, I know your father passed and I know he also received the type of blessing that he and yourself undoubtedly wanted...and probably still do. However, if the faith of everyone involved (especially yourself and your father) was enough to bring to pass the potential healing...well there's something to be said for that. Surely I know that is not nearly as comforting (I will take my own personal healing any day now, Heavenly Father), but he's not suffering, and there are indeed worse things in this life than death.

In my mind, priesthood blessings are real and it seems like the biggest lesson I've learned from them personally is that sometimes it is not so much about the desired outcome of them as it is the faith involved. Small comforts, I know - and if I were to be honest, I'm still trying to live with them on a daily basis.

Hang in there, Wuap, you (and your faith) are stronger than you realize.

[Portland Ute]

Yeah. Hence my post.

Not sure why I'm being mentioned here, I guess.