13 Articles of Healthy Chastity

[Mormon Red Death]

I also agree with Drum that people who do inappropriate things in those interviews are the exception. Still, they exist, and Drum and I know one of them. .

you obviously are referring to haddow

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[Sullyute]

In fact, the best advice I got was from my then future FIL who said to my then fiancee and me right after we got married "You will have the rest of your life to enjoy being intimate so waiting four more months shouldn't be a very long time." That was great advice and put things into perspective at the time.

You had to wait 4 months after you got married to be intimate?!

Seriously speaking I think that was some sage advice that your FIL gave. And it was probablly more effective when it said it to both of you together. Being frank and open about these types of things is what helps the youth and everyone involved.

[byu71]

I don't know about now days, but I don't ever remember a Bishop asking me about masterbation and definitely my parents never talked about it. Funny, but I do vividly remember hearing you would go blind if you did, but from who and when, I don't remember. Might have even been my ex after she had been to relief society.

Anyway, I have a pretty good idea on how to stop young boys from playing with their thinger. Have them sit there and watch some freckled faced, freckled donger, red headed 14 year old yanking on that freckled thing. I doubt many will even see the kid get to the end. They will get up and leave the room before he finishes.

Note: I don think freckle faced red heads are cute, just not if they are playing with their pud.

[shoganai]

A commenter on the FMH article linked to this slate.com article comparing how we present sex to American teenagers as compared to a number of European countries. It's presented as a slideshow, and compares 15 or so advertisements/posters.

The problem I've always had with this argument is that it assumes the only bad things about kids having sex are pregnancy and disease.

Those just happen to be the most visible problems, but they're definitely not the only ones - and maybe not even the most serious ones.

[woot]

The problem I've always had with this argument is that it assumes the only bad things about kids having sex are pregnancy and disease.

Those just happen to be the most visible problems, but they're definitely not the only ones - and maybe not even the most serious ones.

Namely...

[RobinFinderson]

Namely...

Hell.

[RobinFinderson]

Namely...

Also, premarital sex is a gateway activity to hard drugs. I have never met a person who was addicted to hard drugs who didn't try premarital sex first.

[marsupial]

Canned peaches has true significance, broccoli however can only reference the mangled mess that happens to a wrestlers' ears. I do recall a pretty good BYU female hoopster named Jen Leitner who missed a game with an earache and then was suspended the next week. Not exactly a hole I would want to hit but to each their own, I suppose.

I couldn't find a reference to "broccoli and peaches," but I learned that broccoli is a euphemism for marijuana. I already knew what peaches were a euphemism for.

[Moliere]

You had to wait 4 months after you got married to be intimate?!

Seriously speaking I think that was some sage advice that your FIL gave. And it was probablly more effective when it said it to both of you together. Being frank and open about these types of things is what helps the youth and everyone involved.

I thought that was doctine. Is it not?????? j/k I can't believe I made that error.

It was great advice and perfect timing on his part. He's a good man. Very orthodox, but a good man.

[shoganai]

Namely...

I think the argument has been made both scientifically and otherwise that sex outside of a marital relationship carries emotional risks that are quite substantial and complex - particularly with teens.

And, I think LDS should understand as well as anyone how the physical and emotional are tied directly to the spiritual.

[woot]

I think the argument has been made both scientifically and otherwise that sex outside of a marital relationship carries emotional risks that are quite substantial and complex - particularly with teens.

And, I think LDS should understand as well as anyone how the physical and emotional are tied directly to the spiritual.

I guess so, although I don't know how science could show something so vague and subjective. I don't think anyone is disputing that sex strengthens emotional attachments. How does this relate to your point about there being things worse than disease and unwanted pregnancy?

[shoganai]

I guess so, although I don't know how science could show something so vague and subjective. I don't think anyone is disputing that sex strengthens emotional attachments. How does this relate to your point about there being things worse than disease and unwanted pregnancy?

I don't think it's really so vague or difficult to connect diagnosed emotional issues to relationship and lifestyle habits.

To your second question, I think emotional and spiritual illness can have a much greater affect on happiness and quality of life than an STD (or even a pregnancy) can. That doesn't mean it always does, but it definitely can.

[woot]

I don't think it's really so vague or difficult to connect diagnosed emotional issues to relationship and lifestyle habits.

To your second question, I think emotional and spiritual illness can have a much greater affect on happiness and quality of life than an STD (or even a pregnancy) can. That doesn't mean it always does, but it definitely can.

From the perspective of there being no such thing as spiritual illness, I agree that much damage can be caused from feelings of guilt associated with sex, or from being indoctrinated to think that sex is naughty. The subject of this thread demonstrates that quite well, I think.

Still not sure what you mean by "emotional illness" though.

[UtahDan]

The problem I've always had with this argument is that it assumes the only bad things about kids having sex are pregnancy and disease.

Those just happen to be the most visible problems, but they're definitely not the only ones - and maybe not even the most serious ones.

I guess that is sort of hard to quantify. Still, this paragraph is arresting:

In both Europe and America, the age at which most people start having sex is 17. But that's where similarities about teen sexuality begin and end. Teen pregnancy rates in the United States are three to six times higher than in Western European countries. This means that one out of every three American teenage girls becomes pregnant at least once before she reaches the age of 20. (Even poor countries like Algeria, Sri Lanka, China, and Estonia have lower teen birth rates than we do.) The gap between Europe and the United States for sexually transmitted diseases is even greater—gonorrhea and chlamydia rates are 20 to 30 times higher here than in the Netherlands, for example.

That is an awful lot of harm that is happening in our country. You seem to be saying that it is worthwhile having that much unwanted pregnancy and venereal disease because it produces more emotionally and spiritually healthy kids on balance (amongst the ones who don't suffer that). Is that basically right?

[shoganai]

Still not sure what you mean by "emotional illness" though.

It's a broad term to be sure. Just shooting from the hip, I think I would define it as depression, anxiety, anger, or other negative emotions that are severe enough to affect quality of life. Some of these can be biological and beyond human control, but I believe a lot of them can also be symptoms of lifestyle and behavior.