I learned in church today

[HuskyFreeNorthwest]

Congrats, Omaha. I've enjoyed each of mine more than I had anticipated.

I baptized my firstborn this weekend and fortunately caught myself half a second before saying, "...for and in behalf of...." I'm not really sure where that came from because I don't know if I've done temple baptisms in at least 14 years.

PAC would have held that over your head forever.

[smokymountainrain]

My 11 YO son learned that when Christ comes again, all the bad people - and some of the good - will be eaten alive by flies, their flesh will fall off and their eyes will fall out.

So good luck everbody!

[byu71]

My 11 YO son learned that when Christ comes again, all the bad people - and some of the good - will be eaten alive by flies, their flesh will fall off and their eyes will fall out.

So good luck everbody!

My 4 year old grandson must have had a better experience in class. Although I am not big on primary teachers teaching sex education, it came out OK. He told me he "came from Jesus". He caught me off guard and I must have looked puzzled. He cleared it up by telling me, "Jesus put me in Mom's tummy and then I came out later".

[San Juan Sun]

My 4 year old grandson must have had a better experience in class. Although I am not big on primary teachers teaching sex education, it came out OK. He told me he "came from Jesus". He caught me off guard and I must have looked puzzled. He cleared it up by telling me, "Jesus put me in Mom's tummy and then I came out later".

My 4 year old was telling us the other day that he remembered jumping off a cloud and being put in mom's belly, and then opening his eyes when he was born. He's obviously full of it, because I was there when he was born and he didn't open his eyes at all.

[Sullyute]

My 4 year old grandson must have had a better experience in class. Although I am not big on primary teachers teaching sex education, it came out OK. He told me he "came from Jesus". He caught me off guard and I must have looked puzzled. He cleared it up by telling me, "Jesus put me in Mom's tummy and then I came out later".

In latin and central america that statement could be fairly accurate.

[Flystripper]

My 11 YO son learned that when Christ comes again, all the bad people - and some of the good - will be eaten alive by flies, their flesh will fall off and their eyes will fall out.

So good luck everbody!

OH CRAP!

[statman]

I learned that PAC skips Sunday School and Priesthood meetings.

I haven't been to Sunday School since our youngest child was born (he'll be six on the day of the Winter Solstice). I haven't been to HPG since about three weeks after he turned 18 months. He had serious separation anxiety when we dropped him off at the nursery - he'd throw-up on cue about 15 seconds after we dropped him off. And so we were called to the nursery. And it's been nursery and primary for my wife and I ever since. We currently teach the 4/5 year olds. They are by far the most fun to teach...

[TexTechCoug]

I am learning that being the 3rd speaker is harder when all three of you are asked to speak on the same topic.

[HuskyFreeNorthwest]

I am learning that being the 3rd speaker is harder when all three of you are asked to speak on the same topic.

That's when you freestyle on some fringe topic.

[Indy Coug]

I am learning that being the 3rd speaker is harder when all three of you are asked to speak on the same topic.

I learned that the 3rd speaker either has 30 minutes or 3 minutes to give their talk, and not much in between.

[HuskyFreeNorthwest]

Easier to know when your wife forgives you than God.

[TripletDaddy]

When you throw your hand up to sustain someone, do you look around the chapel at the people being sustained or do you just keep eyes front and sustain in focus? Specifically, do you ever turn around and look behind you to see the person being sustained?

I noticed today that when people look around, they often throw out an additional, non-doctrinal sustaining smile towards the person in question, i guess as a way to show direct support for the person being called.

I dont do the sustaining smile but today I shot my hand up before the Bishop had even finished the "all those in favor" part because I wanted to be the first person to sustain. It was a good solid several seconds before he was done. Even though I didn't look back or smile, I like to think that the person being called saw my support and felt edified.

[Clark Addison]

When you throw your hand up to sustain someone, do you look around the chapel at the people being sustained or do you just keep eyes front and sustain in focus? Specifically, do you ever turn around and look behind you to see the person being sustained?

I noticed today that when people look around, they often throw out an additional, non-doctrinal sustaining smile towards the person in question, i guess as a way to show direct support for the person being called.

I dont do the sustaining smile but today I shot my hand up before the Bishop had even finished the "all those in favor" part because I wanted to be the first person to sustain. It was a good solid several seconds before he was done. Even though I didn't look back or smile, I like to think that the person being called saw my support and felt edified.

We had Stake Conference today, and I like to play a game where, after the intermediate hymn, I am the last person to sit down. This can be very tricky, as there are often clueless children, mothers leaning over several seats to berate clueless children, old people who have a hard time getting back down, and the like. Through a good bit of perseverance and pretending to look around for something, I was successful today, even though it meant staying standing until the 1st counselor in the Stake Presidency was already speaking.

I guess it really doesn't have much to do with your actions, especially since no one is really supported or edified, especially my wife, who thinks I am an idiot.

P.S. I do the same thing at the temple at certain points. I think that one is more of a noble pursuit, as it started after an embarrassing incident where, during one of my first times attending, I tied something on the wrong side or something, which caused the helpful old man to walk over and partially undress me while an entire room, including my MTC district, sat and watched. Sometime after that, when I had returned home, I decided to try to be the last person standing, so that any inexperienced temple-goer who was fumbling with all of the accoutrements could look at me and say, "Well, at least that bald man is still struggling. I am not the only one". I will admit that is has become less of a charitable act and more of a game as the years have gone by, but since my wife is on the other side of the room, there is nothing she can do about it, except whisper angrily at me in the Celestial Room.

P.P.S Google Chrome seems to think that "accoutrements" is spelled "accouterments", but I am fairly certain I am correct here. "Accouterments" sounds like the stuff on the walls of the garage in "The Dukes of Hazard".

[TripletDaddy]

I like your game. I think I'm going to try it, although I often don't stand up for the rest hymn.

I have been playing a similar game for years wherein I try to either be the last person to show up for sacrament or the first person to leave for home after sacrament is over.

[Soccermom]

I like your game. I think I'm going to try it, although I often don't stand up for the rest hymn.

I have been playing a similar game for years wherein I try to either be the last person to show up for sacrament or the first person to leave for home after sacrament is over.

Let us know when you play and win both games on the same Sunday. Any given Sunday. . .