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I learned in church today

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  • Originally posted by HuskyFreeNorthwest View Post
    Unless they show compassion with pizza.
    eh . . . maybe.
    Dio perdona tante cose per un’opera di misericordia
    God forgives many things for an act of mercy
    Alessandro Manzoni

    Knock it off. This board has enough problems without a dose of middle-age lechery.

    pelagius

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    • Whether by necessity or pure irony, the lesson on "teaching with the spirit" typically isn't.
      I told him he was a goddamn Nazi Stormtrooper.

      Comment


      • Originally posted by pellegrino View Post
        eh . . . maybe.
        Give 'em Hell, Cougars!!!

        For all this His anger is not turned away, but His hand is stretched out still.

        Not long ago an obituary appeared in the Salt Lake Tribune that said the recently departed had "died doing what he enjoyed most—watching BYU lose."

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        • I learned what an aborted fetus looks like.
          "Nobody listens to Turtle."
          -Turtle
          sigpic

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          • Originally posted by Surfah View Post
            I learned what an aborted fetus looks like.
            That's part of the correlated material now?
            "In conclusion, let me give a shout-out to dirty sex. What a great thing it is" - Northwestcoug
            "And you people wonder why you've had extermination orders issued against you." - landpoke
            "Can't . . . let . . . foolish statements . . . by . . . BYU fans . . . go . . . unanswered . . . ." - LA Ute

            Comment


            • Originally posted by DU Ute View Post
              That's part of the correlated material now?
              I sure as hell hope not.
              "Nobody listens to Turtle."
              -Turtle
              sigpic

              Comment


              • Originally posted by Surfah View Post
                I learned what an aborted fetus looks like.
                I can't believe that more details of this haven't come out yet. I just can't consider ANY context where this would have made any sense/been even remotely appropriate. I'd like some more detail just for the "Gah!" factor.
                I told him he was a goddamn Nazi Stormtrooper.

                Comment


                • I learned in church yesterday that they are teaching the YW that everything from their shoulders to their knees is the strike zone an they are not to let anybody ever touch them anywhere in the strike zone when dating. Not the back, not the shoulder, not the thigh, nowhere. Had this rule been strictly followed the girls I knew growing up, I'm pretty sure I would have married outside of the faith.
                  Awesomeness now has a name. Let me introduce myself.

                  Comment


                  • Originally posted by nikuman View Post
                    I learned in church yesterday that they are teaching the YW that everything from their shoulders to their knees is the strike zone an they are not to let anybody ever touch them anywhere in the strike zone when dating. Not the back, not the shoulder, not the thigh, nowhere. Had this rule been strictly followed the girls I knew growing up, I'm pretty sure I would have married outside of the faith.
                    I agree. But as a father of two girls I am loving the strike zone.
                    *Banned*

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by cougjunkie View Post
                      I agree. But as a father of two girls I am loving the strike zone.
                      Expand the strike zone! (And no DH-ing!)

                      National League rules.
                      Fitter. Happier. More Productive.

                      sigpic

                      Comment


                      • Sunday School Manuals are terrible, No. 1037:

                        The teacher should emphasize that the Great and Abominable, or the Church of the Devil is not the Catholic church (though be careful not to say the word Catholic). As authoritative proof that the Book of Mormon is not referring to the Catholic Church (reminder: do not say Catholic, instead say "any particular church or organization") read the following lengthy quote on the subject from...

                        wait for it...


                        wait for it...


                        Bruce R. McConkie from his work...


                        wait for it...


                        wait for it...


                        MORMON DOCTRINE!


                        Be sure not to note that a major reason the Church of the Devil is equated with the Catholic Church by modern Mormons is due to Bruce R. McConkie's publication of Mormon Doctrine.


                        The teacher should further attempt to drain the term Church of the Devil from any real meaning. Attempt to use the most banal examples i.e. "the media," Al Queda, or book clubs that read classic novels books containing questionable sexual content, and yes, of course, Bunco can also be part of the Church of the Devil. Pay no attention to what the scripture verses say about the Church of the Devil as such discussion may confuse the members.

                        Comment


                        • Originally posted by TripletDaddy View Post
                          Expand the strike zone! (And no DH-ing!)

                          National League rules.
                          I'm not the guy who wants to be calling stuff high and inside or low and tight, thank you very much.
                          Awesomeness now has a name. Let me introduce myself.

                          Comment


                          • Originally posted by Jacob View Post
                            Sunday School Manuals are terrible, No. 1037:

                            The teacher should emphasize that the Great and Abominable, or the Church of the Devil is not the Catholic church (though be careful not to say the word Catholic). As authoritative proof that the Book of Mormon is not referring to the Catholic Church (reminder: do not say Catholic, instead say "any particular church or organization") read the following lengthy quote on the subject from...

                            wait for it...


                            wait for it...


                            Bruce R. McConkie from his work...


                            wait for it...


                            wait for it...


                            MORMON DOCTRINE!


                            Be sure not to note that a major reason the Church of the Devil is equated with the Catholic Church by modern Mormons is due to Bruce R. McConkie's publication of Mormon Doctrine.


                            The teacher should further attempt to drain the term Church of the Devil from any real meaning. Attempt to use the most banal examples i.e. "the media," Al Queda, or book clubs that read classic novels books containing questionable sexual content, and yes, of course, Bunco can also be part of the Church of the Devil. Pay no attention to what the scripture verses say about the Church of the Devil as such discussion may confuse the members.
                            Ha. That's great. Which lesson is that from?
                            Prepare to put mustard on those words, for you will soon be consuming them, along with this slice of humble pie that comes direct from the oven of shame set at gas mark “egg on your face”! -- Moss

                            There's three rules that I live by: never get less than twelve hours sleep; never play cards with a guy who's got the same first name as a city; and never go near a lady's got a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, everything else is cream cheese. --Coach Finstock

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by Donuthole View Post
                              Ha. That's great. Which lesson is that from?
                              Book of Mormon Lesson 4
                              http://lds.org/manual/book-of-mormon...pirit?lang=eng

                              My thoughts, of course, are paraphrases from the manual and the class I attended.

                              Comment


                              • Originally posted by Jacob View Post
                                Sunday School Manuals are terrible, No. 1037:

                                The teacher should emphasize that the Great and Abominable, or the Church of the Devil is not the Catholic church (though be careful not to say the word Catholic). As authoritative proof that the Book of Mormon is not referring to the Catholic Church (reminder: do not say Catholic, instead say "any particular church or organization") read the following lengthy quote on the subject from...

                                wait for it...


                                wait for it...


                                Bruce R. McConkie from his work...


                                wait for it...


                                wait for it...


                                MORMON DOCTRINE!


                                Be sure not to note that a major reason the Church of the Devil is equated with the Catholic Church by modern Mormons is due to Bruce R. McConkie's publication of Mormon Doctrine.


                                The teacher should further attempt to drain the term Church of the Devil from any real meaning. Attempt to use the most banal examples i.e. "the media," Al Queda, or book clubs that read classic novels books containing questionable sexual content, and yes, of course, Bunco can also be part of the Church of the Devil. Pay no attention to what the scripture verses say about the Church of the Devil as such discussion may confuse the members.
                                We had a great discussion in our class about this topic...took up a good 10-15 minutes. Someone did throw out the Catholic church "as heard on the mission" but it was pretty quickly dismissed.
                                "They're good. They've always been good" - David Shaw.

                                Well, because he thought it was good sport. Because some men aren't looking for anything logical, like money. They can't be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn.

                                Comment

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