I learned in church today

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  • Parrot Head
    Operation Hot Mother
    • Nov 2008
    • 2322

    #2506
    Originally posted by SteelBlue View Post
    It's amazing how long prayers can get when people have a chance to pray in front of an apostle.
    We only had a 70 member with us! There were several points where it felt like it would end, but then it was followed by, "And we also...." I think there was even a "We would be remiss if we did not thank thee for...."

    "Would be remiss" is up there beyond "fiber of my being" to me because I hear the latter so rarely that it would be funny. Would you be remiss? How would that feel?
    I have nothing else to say at this time.

    Comment

    • Moliere
      One man.....one pie
      • Oct 2009
      • 27800

      #2507
      Originally posted by Parrot Head View Post
      We only had a 70 member with us! There were several points where it felt like it would end, but then it was followed by, "And we also...." I think there was even a "We would be remiss if we did not thank thee for...."

      "Would be remiss" is up there beyond "fiber of my being" to me because I hear the latter so rarely that it would be funny. Would you be remiss? How would that feel?
      When I was a teenager I was watching the Sunday morning session of conference at home. Those sessions always seemed longer than 2 hours, but this one was super boring and I just wanted it to end. The last speaker went way over and I was not looking forward to the typical long prayer. To my surprise, the guy gave what was probably a 20 second prayer.

      I then realized he had to cut it short because the broadcast was going to go over time if he didn't. That was one of the times in my life that I was thankful for commercials and the strict cutoff of broadcasting times. Seem times I wish my church meetings had hard cutoffs.
      "Discipleship is not a spectator sport. We cannot expect to experience the blessing of faith by standing inactive on the sidelines any more than we can experience the benefits of health by sitting on a sofa watching sporting events on television and giving advice to the athletes. And yet for some, “spectator discipleship” is a preferred if not primary way of worshipping." -Pres. Uchtdorf

      Comment

      • Non Sequitur
        Where did I put my bodkin
        • Nov 2008
        • 5773

        #2508
        Originally posted by Parrot Head View Post
        "Would be remiss" is up there beyond "fiber of my being" to me because I hear the latter so rarely that it would be funny. Would you be remiss? How would that feel?
        My favorite was "oft times". I remember a testimony meaning when the 1st counselor bearing his testimony dropped the phrase half a dozen times...I remember it because I nudged my wife and pointed it out, only to be returned with a cold stare. I swear that phrase does not exist outside of LDS chapels.
        "The mind is not a boomerang. If you throw it too far it will not come back." ~ Tom McGuane

        Comment

        • clackamascoug
          Banned
          • Dec 2009
          • 9709

          #2509
          My talk today on "how to build your faith, to be able to endure to the end" was well received. I had 20 minutes and used up 21 in tying it all together. I guess my favorite post meeting compliment was from a 16 year old girl I didn't know. She said, "I usually don't listen to the talks, but you had me engaged the whole time. I really enjoyed it." Now that made me feel good.

          Comment

          • TripletDaddy
            sweet triple
            • Nov 2008
            • 58186

            #2510
            You know those talks that are really boring? The ones that never seem to end?

            Those speakers get compliments after Sacrament, too.
            Fitter. Happier. More Productive.

            sigpic

            Comment

            • sparky
              Junior Member
              • Dec 2011
              • 158

              #2511
              What it's like living in Bronco nation: In EQ, it's completely appropriate to pass around a signup sheet for those who would offer their home to those who don't have ESPN for Friday's BSU game. Also, vocally offering your home for Thursday's BYU game brings only puzzled looks.

              Comment

              • Clark Addison
                Senior Member
                • Nov 2008
                • 10291

                #2512
                Originally posted by Parrot Head View Post
                We only had a 70 member with us! There were several points where it felt like it would end, but then it was followed by, "And we also...." I think there was even a "We would be remiss if we did not thank thee for...."

                "Would be remiss" is up there beyond "fiber of my being" to me because I hear the latter so rarely that it would be funny. Would you be remiss? How would that feel?
                I'll confirm that this prayer was not only extremelly long (my wife looked at me about halfway through it and mouthed "Come on!"), but also full of GA-Speak ("...even our beloved prophet, Thomas Spencer Monson..."). I wish that I had recorded it, because it was really over the top. Immediately after it was over, or maybe even before, I texted Parrot Head asking who gave it, as he was among the righteous (at the time) sitting in view of the speaker, while I was lounging in the High Council room.

                Comment

                • FN Phat
                  I ♥ gateway sex
                  • Feb 2009
                  • 8691

                  #2513
                  Originally posted by sparky View Post
                  What it's like living in Bronco nation: In EQ, it's completely appropriate to pass around a signup sheet for those who would offer their home to those who don't have ESPN for Friday's BSU game. Also, vocally offering your home for Thursday's BYU game brings only puzzled looks.
                  You truly live in God's country!
                  I'm your huckleberry.


                  "I love pulling the bone. Really though, what guy doesn't?" - CJF

                  Comment

                  • kimchicoug
                    Junior Member
                    • Jun 2012
                    • 153

                    #2514
                    One of the SS teachers is really out there politically. He is extremely right-wing and has to interject politics in every single lesson.

                    We all learned this week that pharmaceutical companies are the most evil entities in the world in these last days and their products are from Satan. After some passionate disagree by members of the audience, Cap'n Crazy had his buddy in the ward explain to us the "exact temple ceremony in ancient times" and a recap of how the wicked will be destroyed. Piece by gruesome piece. My wife (who is a lot more patient then I am) left to "go feed the baby" for 45 minutes while I decided to take Ryan Williams on my fantasy draft later in the day.

                    Comment

                    • sparky
                      Junior Member
                      • Dec 2011
                      • 158

                      #2515
                      Originally posted by FN Phat View Post
                      You truly live in God's country!
                      Indeed, at least most of the time. Lately it's more like hell with all this smoke.

                      Comment

                      • wuapinmon
                        Soul Plumber
                        • Dec 2008
                        • 30711

                        #2516
                        Originally posted by Clark Addison View Post
                        I'll confirm that this prayer was not only extremelly long (my wife looked at me about halfway through it and mouthed "Come on!"), but also full of GA-Speak ("...even our beloved prophet, Thomas Spencer Monson..."). I wish that I had recorded it, because it was really over the top. Immediately after it was over, or maybe even before, I texted Parrot Head asking who gave it, as he was among the righteous (at the time) sitting in view of the speaker, while I was lounging in the High Council room.
                        I've contemplated saying, "AMEN" really loudly during an overly long prayer, but I've never had the stones to actually try it.
                        "Wuap's "problem" is that he is smart & principled & committed to a moral course of action. His actions are supposed to reflect his ethical code.
                        The rest of us rarely bother to think about our actions." --Solon

                        Comment

                        • Parrot Head
                          Operation Hot Mother
                          • Nov 2008
                          • 2322

                          #2517
                          Originally posted by Clark Addison View Post
                          I'll confirm that this prayer was not only extremelly long (my wife looked at me about halfway through it and mouthed "Come on!"), but also full of GA-Speak ("...even our beloved prophet, Thomas Spencer Monson..."). I wish that I had recorded it, because it was really over the top. Immediately after it was over, or maybe even before, I texted Parrot Head asking who gave it, as he was among the righteous (at the time) sitting in view of the speaker, while I was lounging in the High Council room.
                          Ummmm... I was in the lobby having just arrived in the building after illegally parking in a nearby neighborhood, but the rest of the family was in the cultural hall.
                          I have nothing else to say at this time.

                          Comment

                          • Green Monstah
                            Royal Rooter
                            • Aug 2010
                            • 13907

                            #2518
                            Originally posted by wuapinmon View Post
                            I've contemplated saying, "AMEN" really loudly during an overly long prayer, but I've never had the stones to actually try it.
                            Such a good idea. I will return and report.
                            Jesus wants me for a sunbeam.

                            "Cog dis is a bitch." -James Patterson

                            Comment

                            • FMCoug
                              Senior Member
                              • Nov 2008
                              • 6825

                              #2519
                              I learned today that the "paint shaker" methodology fir baby blessings is alive and well in the Lehi something or other ward. I tried not to participate in the shaking but it was like trying to stop the tide.

                              We are now being treated to a review of the RNC.
                              "It's true that everything happens for a reason. Just remember that sometimes that reason is that you did something really, really, stupid."

                              Comment

                              • FMCoug
                                Senior Member
                                • Nov 2008
                                • 6825

                                #2520
                                Open Mic day in this ward is awesome!

                                Now we are hearing about how doctors are led by the spirit to diagnose things... ir sounded to me more like the doctor was engaged in something called doing his job.
                                "It's true that everything happens for a reason. Just remember that sometimes that reason is that you did something really, really, stupid."

                                Comment

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