I learned in church today

[LA Ute]

I learned that "BYU can be damaging to your faith. ... And stay away from drugs too."

Sounds like truth to me.

[wuapinmon]

I learned that scientists in the 1970's were predicting a global freeze, so we shouldn't be that concerned about global warming.

[Katy Lied]

Someone in GD class made a reference to One Tin Soldier. I came back with a Legend of Billy Jack reference.

[Paperback Writer]

Pretzel Logic

GD teacher: Why did the people become wicked under King Noah?
Participant 1: Because Noah was a wicked king - he led the people astray.
Participant 2: The blame for their wickedness can't all be laid at the feet of King Noah. The people of Limhi chose wickedness by their own admission.
GD teacher: That's a good point. That's why it's so important to listen to the Holy Ghost so we won't be led astray.
..... (10 minutes later) .....
GD teacher: So how do we ensure our families remain righteous and not fall into wickedness?
Participant 2: Listen to the Holy Ghost.
GD teacher: No. Follow the prophet.
Participant 2: Isn't that what the people of Limhi did?
GD teacher: But they were following "bad" prophets.

[thesaint258]

The best line today has been, "I'm a high school drama teacher, so all of my kids have major problems."

[doctorcoug]

"if the body is to acidic it can kill. Mine was too acidic, which is why my jewelry turned green. Thankfully, God gave us fat, which is why I'm still alive. The fat saves your life. My doctor also gave me a cream to save my life and it kills cancer."

Ugh...

[Slim]

"if the body is to acidic it can kill. Mine was too acidic, which is why my jewelry turned green. Thankfully, God gave us fat, which is why I'm still alive. The fat saves your life. My doctor also gave me a cream to save my life and it kills cancer."

Ugh...

Bwahahaha

[Omaha 680]

Don't come late to the spanish speaking ward in Denver. The ushers barricade the doors during the sacrament and it isn't brought to the foyer for stragglers. The musical number today was a missionary singing Oh My Father....a capella...all verses. He did well but it seemed an odd choice for mothers day.

I did enjoy the meeting very much though. Everything always seems so much more sincere to me in spanish speaking meetings. I'm sure it's just because I associate the gospel in spanish with my mission...a time when I was more sincere.

[DU Ute]

"if the body is to acidic it can kill. Mine was too acidic, which is why my jewelry turned green. Thankfully, God gave us fat, which is why I'm still alive. The fat saves your life. My doctor also gaveme a cream to save my life and it kills cancer."

Ugh...

If fat saves your life, I'm guessing the cancer killing cream was made by Ben and Jerry. She should also tell her husband to stop buying her cheap jewelry.

[pellegrino]

Don't come late to the spanish speaking ward in Denver. The ushers barricade the doors during the sacrament and it isn't brought to the foyer for stragglers. The musical number today was a missionary singing Oh My Father....a capella...all verses. He did well but it seemed an odd choice for mothers day.

I did enjoy the meeting very much though. Everything always seems so much more sincere to me in spanish speaking meetings. I'm sure it's just because I associate the gospel in spanish with my mission...a time when I was more sincere.

pshaw! The choice is obvious. It's like the only sanctioned reference to Heavenly Mother.

[Omaha 680]

pshaw! The choice is obvious. It's like the only sanctioned reference to Heavenly Mother.

That was my immediate thought too. But it takes three verses to get there. That's a long time in an a capella solo.

[pellegrino]

That was my immediate thought too. But it takes three verses to get there. That's a long time in an a capella solo.

A common spiritual gift among Mormon is that of torturing logic.

[Surfah]

Don't come late to the spanish speaking ward in Denver. The ushers barricade the doors during the sacrament and it isn't brought to the foyer for stragglers. The musical number today was a missionary singing Oh My Father....a capella...all verses. He did well but it seemed an odd choice for mothers day.

I did enjoy the meeting very much though. Everything always seems so much more sincere to me in spanish speaking meetings. I'm sure it's just because I associate the gospel in spanish with my mission...a time when I was more sincere.

Which ward did you attend? Was it the one on the hill on Zuni St? That tradition began about 12 years ago when it was the only Spanish speaking ward in the entire Denver metro area. They used to put folding chairs in the aisles of the chapel as well as in the foyer and it still couldn't accommodate everyone. As you can imagine it was difficult passing the sacrament. So the Bishop at the time decided to not allow the sacrament passed beyond the chapel doors. I didn't realize they still did it. The ward split east-west and there is another large Spanish ward on the Aurora side.

[Omaha 680]

Which ward did you attend? Was it the one on the hill on Zuni St? That tradition began about 12 years ago when it was the only Spanish speaking ward in the entire Denver metro area. They used to put folding chairs in the aisles of the chapel as well as in the foyer and it still couldn't accommodate everyone. As you can imagine it was difficult passing the sacrament. So the Bishop at the time decided to not allow the sacrament passed beyond the chapel doors. I didn't realize they still did it. The ward split east-west and there is another large Spanish ward on the Aurora side.

I was at the one on the Aurora side. Looks like the tradition was brought to the new ward.

[Surfah]

I was at the one on the Aurora side. Looks like the tradition was brought to the new ward.

Yeah it did initially because when the ward split the original bishop became the Aurora Spanish Ward bishop.

I served Spanish speaking in Denver South about 13 years ago. When it was just the one ward we had 4 Spanish companionships from our mission and another set from the North mission all serving in that ward. There were baptisms every Sunday. In fact, I spent the first 6 months of my mission in that ward and there was only one Sunday during that span that one of the 5 companionships didn't have a baptism. It was a lot of fun. It was like stake conference every week and we actually would interpret meetings into English for gringo visitors. I think they split the ward in 2000. I served in the Aurora ward the last 6 months of my mission. That too was a great ward with some stalwart families. Though the ward clashed at times with the other English wards in that chapel initially. I think this was mostly due to the Spanish members not used to sharing a building as the Zuni chapel was theirs alone.