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This Mark Sanford Thing

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  • #76
    Originally posted by il Padrino Ute View Post
    No, it doesn't.

    Marriage is a commitment. If a man's primary drive is to not commit to one woman, a man should not marry. If a man enters into marriage, he should commit to only his wife.
    Well, according to proponents of some branches of evolutionary psychology, all men, with very few exceptions, experience as their 'primary drive' the need to have sex with multiple partners. Didn't BY himself acknowledge this very point, before the idea of evolutionary psychology ever existed?

    If marriage works fundamentally against men's 'primary drive,' then maybe it is an inherently unfair institution. Feminism 101.

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    • #77
      "Wuap's "problem" is that he is smart & principled & committed to a moral course of action. His actions are supposed to reflect his ethical code.
      The rest of us rarely bother to think about our actions." --Solon

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      • #78
        I quote Sgt. Friday from Dragnet:

        There's two things that separate us from the animal kingdom; we use cutlery, and we're able to control our sexual urges.


        I do, however, remember thinking as a missionary, that if Jennifer Connelly tried to seduce me, I would be powerless to resist. It would've just happened.
        "Wuap's "problem" is that he is smart & principled & committed to a moral course of action. His actions are supposed to reflect his ethical code.
        The rest of us rarely bother to think about our actions." --Solon

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        • #79
          Originally posted by RobinFinderson View Post
          Well, according to proponents of some branches of evolutionary psychology, all men, with very few exceptions, experience as their 'primary drive' the need to have sex with multiple partners. Didn't BY himself acknowledge this very point, before the idea of evolutionary psychology ever existed?

          If marriage works fundamentally against men's 'primary drive,' then maybe it is an inherently unfair institution. Feminism 101.
          Again, if a man commits to marriage, he should be faithful to his wife.

          Saying that it's an unfair institution only gives you an excuse to cheat.
          "Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance and the gospel of envy; its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill


          "I only know what I hear on the news." - Dear Leader

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          • #80
            Apparently there were others. He says he never "crossed the ultimate line" with the others. I say, most likely, bs. I found a couple of quotes from the article intersting.

            "This was a whole lot more than a simple affair, this was a love story," Mr. Sanford said. "A forbidden one, a tragic one, but a love story at the end of the day."
            During an emotional interview at his statehouse office with the Associated Press on Tuesday, Mr. Sanford said Ms. Chapur is his soul mate, but he is trying to fall back in love with his wife.
            She [Mrs. Sanford] didn't immediately return a message seeking comment Tuesday, but she told the Associated Press in an interview Friday that her husband had repeatedly sought permission to visit Ms. Chapur.

            "I said absolutely not. It's one thing to forgive adultery; it's another thing to condone it," she said.
            I can't believe that such a terrible thing could happen to such a nice guy like Mr. Sanford. It truly must have been destiny.

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            • #81
              Originally posted by I.J. Reilly View Post
              I can't believe that such a terrible thing could happen to such a nice guy like Mr. Sanford. It truly must have been destiny.
              More like density.
              Give 'em Hell, Cougars!!!

              For all this His anger is not turned away, but His hand is stretched out still.

              Not long ago an obituary appeared in the Salt Lake Tribune that said the recently departed had "died doing what he enjoyed most—watching BYU lose."

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              • #82
                Quote:
                She [Mrs. Sanford] didn't immediately return a message seeking comment Tuesday, but she told the Associated Press in an interview Friday that her husband had repeatedly sought permission to visit Ms. Chapur.

                "I said absolutely not. It's one thing to forgive adultery; it's another thing to condone it," she said.
                What kind of moron asks his wife if it is ok to go see another woman.

                Mr. Sanford: "Honey, I would really like to go visit Ms. Chapur this weekend"

                Mrs. Sanford: "No problem. After you are done screwing her brains out, just make sure you make it home in time to take Timmy to soccer practice on Monday."
                "The first thing I learned upon becoming a head coach after fifteen years as an assistant was the enormous difference between making a suggestion and making a decision."

                "They talk about the economy this year. Hey, my hairline is in recession, my waistline is in inflation. Altogether, I'm in a depression."

                "I like to bike. I could beat Lance Armstrong, only because he couldn't pass me if he was behind me."

                -Rick Majerus

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                • #83
                  Originally posted by Jarid in Cedar View Post
                  What kind of moron asks his wife if it is ok to go see another woman.
                  An honest man? Marriage, as an institution, requires a couple to make promises that their futures selves may no longer want to keep. Divorce is one way to renegotiate the terms of that original agreement, but it is not the only way. It sounds like Sanford was in a relationship which remained mutually beneficial in some way, but was no longer meeting his expectations of love, romance and sex. So he attempted to renegotiate the terms of his marriage without getting a divorce. On the long list of questionable choices that led Sanford to where he is today, I actually have some respect for the fact that he was honest with his wife about what was going on.

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                  • #84
                    Originally posted by Jarid in Cedar View Post
                    What kind of moron asks his wife if it is ok to go see another woman.

                    Mr. Sanford: "Honey, I would really like to go visit Ms. Chapur this weekend"

                    Mrs. Sanford: "No problem. After you are done screwing her brains out, just make sure you make it home in time to take Timmy to soccer practice on Monday."
                    He was advocating the same sort of open relationship that Robin was all for a few threads back. She was not.

                    Perhaps we should arrange a meeting btw Robin and Mrs. Sanford. Or maybe Mrs. Sanford and the nation's first analrapist:

                    Comment

                    • #85
                      Originally posted by RobinFinderson View Post
                      An honest man? Marriage, as an institution, requires a couple to make promises that their futures selves may no longer want to keep. Divorce is one way to renegotiate the terms of that original agreement, but it is not the only way. It sounds like Sanford was in a relationship which remained mutually beneficial in some way, but was no longer meeting his expectations of love, romance and sex. So he attempted to renegotiate the terms of his marriage without getting a divorce. On the long list of questionable choices that led Sanford to where he is today, I actually have some respect for the fact that he was honest with his wife about what was going on.
                      Looks like Robin beat me to my reference to his words.

                      And Robin, read the article. He was only asking to meet with her after he was originally found out. After which he did meet with her, in NYC, with a spiritual advisor in which they had dinner together. Sounds like a lovely meeting.

                      Comment

                      • #86
                        Originally posted by I.J. Reilly View Post
                        He was advocating the same sort of open relationship that Robin was all for a few threads back. She was not.

                        Perhaps we should arrange a meeting btw Robin and Mrs. Sanford. Or maybe Mrs. Sanford and the nation's first analrapist:

                        Tobias: You know, Lindsay, as a therapist, I have advised a number of couples to explore an open relationship where the couple remains emotionally committed, but free to explore extra-marital encounters.

                        Lindsay: Well, did it work for those people?

                        Tobias: No, it never does. I mean, these people somehow delude themselves into thinking it might, but...but it might work for us.

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                        • #87
                          Originally posted by UtahDan View Post
                          Tobias: You know, Lindsay, as a therapist, I have advised a number of couples to explore an open relationship where the couple remains emotionally committed, but free to explore extra-marital encounters.

                          Lindsay: Well, did it work for those people?

                          Tobias: No, it never does. I mean, these people somehow delude themselves into thinking it might, but...but it might work for us.
                          Faith and I went down to Santa Monica to have a run on the beach. It was beautiful, and the weather was perfect. Toward the end of our three miles I was exhausted (faith makes running look easy) so we were walking back toward the Santa Monica Pier. Throughout the run we had seen all sorts of people, young and old, at various stages of fitness and decrepitude. So I said to Faith, "When I'm a wrinkly old man with swollen balls, hemorrhoids and psoriasis, are you still going to let me molest you, or are you going to prefer that I seek the company of younger women?" She replied, "What kind of question is that??" And I said, "I'm just saying, I wouldn't want my shriveled old man bits and fungus thickened nails touching me. I'm just trying to be respectful of your person." She said, "We'll see." So my dream of the open relationship is still alive!

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                          • #88
                            Originally posted by RobinFinderson View Post
                            An honest man? Marriage, as an institution, requires a couple to make promises that their futures selves may no longer want to keep. Divorce is one way to renegotiate the terms of that original agreement, but it is not the only way. It sounds like Sanford was in a relationship which remained mutually beneficial in some way, but was no longer meeting his expectations of love, romance and sex. So he attempted to renegotiate the terms of his marriage without getting a divorce. On the long list of questionable choices that led Sanford to where he is today, I actually have some respect for the fact that he was honest with his wife about what was going on.
                            An honest man? WTF?

                            Only a selfish asshole would cheat on his spouse or ask his spouse if it would be ok to cheat.
                            "Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance and the gospel of envy; its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill


                            "I only know what I hear on the news." - Dear Leader

                            Comment

                            • #89
                              Originally posted by il Padrino Ute View Post
                              An honest man? WTF?

                              Only a selfish asshole would cheat on his spouse or ask his spouse if it would be ok to cheat.
                              Cheating means breaking the rules. It isn't cheating if the rules allow it, and couples are always able to renegotiate the TOS.

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