exmo.com comes to WashPo

[Jeff Lebowski]

I am already on the outs as an "apostate" Lebowski. It doesn't really matter what I say now.

So it's time for scorched earth?

We have lots of well-loved apostates around here. What you say matters very much.

[NorthwestUteFan]

What a bunch of pansies. Leave the Mormon church and your family might not talk to you. Big whoop. If they can accept a family member exercising his free agency and value their own relationships with the church over their relationships with the person who left, then perhaps they are not 'worthy' to be a part of his life.

A Muslim man was baptized in my zone when I was a missionary. He was informed that he was marked for death of her ever returned to his home village in Pakistan, and his family told him they might not be able to protect him. Some anonymous person filed what he claimed to be a false affadavit with the Department of Family Services and he was barred from being within 500 feet of his daughter.

[LA Ute]

We have lots of well-loved apostates around here. What you say matters very much.

[YOhio]

I have a buddy who has left the church and instead of shunning him, his family has opted for the project approach. He's deluged with spiritual thoughts by email, is constantly the subject of family fasts and his name is always on the temple prayer roll. He's invited every time a cousin, niece or nephew has a baptism or ordination. He takes it in good stride, but I actually think he'd rather be shunned.

[SuperGabers]

So it's time for scorched earth?

We have lots of well-loved apostates around here. What you say matters very much.

Sheesh. I hope not. I have a bunch of mortal living yet to do.

[UtahDan]

My Evangelical Presbyterian buddy (yes, there are people in that faith category, lots of them -- I was surprised to learn this) says it is run of the mill, that every faith, including his, has its disaffected current and former adherents. I am not sure the cultural imprint is nearly as indelible or potentially vexing for his crowd as it is for our Mormon tribe (or, e.g., many Jewish, Pentecostal or Catholic groups) but it is there.

"Cultural imprint" is a good way to put it. And yes, I think it does make it harder than those other groups have it. But we're Mormons. We pulled our shit across the plains made some pretty inhospitable places flourish. We can figure it out.

[jay santos]

ftr, I think any mother or father who won't receive their son or daughter for five years due to leaving the church, ought to be shot. Hell maybe they should be excommunicated. That's child abuse, IMO.

I don't think that kind of response is typical based on my life experience. And based on the rest of the article, I'm highly suspicious it's a lie.

[Flystripper]

I have a buddy who has left the church and instead of shunning him, his family has opted for the project approach. He's deluged with spiritual thoughts by email, is constantly the subject of family fasts and his name is always on the temple prayer roll. He's invited every time a cousin, niece or nephew has a baptism or ordination. He takes it in good stride, but I actually think he'd rather be shunned.

LOL shunning ain't all bad!

[scottie]

I have a buddy who has left the church and instead of shunning him, his family has opted for the project approach. He's deluged with spiritual thoughts by email, is constantly the subject of family fasts and his name is always on the temple prayer roll. He's invited every time a cousin, niece or nephew has a baptism or ordination. He takes it in good stride, but I actually think he'd rather be shunned.

That's pretty good, YOhio.

[UtahDan]

I started to do a multi-quote analysis on this for UtahDan, but nearly every paragraph, sometimes multiple sentences per paragraph, is filled with exaggeration or outright lie.

Hey! Strive to be nice with me!

[LA Ute]

I have a buddy who has left the church and instead of shunning him, his family has opted for the project approach. He's deluged with spiritual thoughts by email, is constantly the subject of family fasts and his name is always on the temple prayer roll. He's invited every time a cousin, niece or nephew has a baptism or ordination. He takes it in good stride, but I actually think he'd rather be shunned.

You still haven't thanked me.

[UtahDan]

This is an interesting post. Where do you meet all these shunned ex-Mormons? Do you moonlight as an ex-Mo grief counselor or something?

Facebook groups in part. But I also work behind the scenes with Mormon Expression. The volume of this sort of thing we receive by email is astonishing. So much so that it was necessary to seek volunteers to sort/respond to/forward emails that arrive at the email addresses of the main personalities on the podcast.

[UtahDan]

I understand that there are multiple ways that people can fall away from the church. In fact, I think some have very compelling reasons and their final judgment will probably take that into consideration.

So in fairness I dont think its crazy, but I do think its sad. And I hope that she will one day see the error of her ways and come back to the fold.

I can respect that. Truly.

[Moliere]

ftr, I think any mother or father who won't receive their son or daughter for five years due to leaving the church, ought to be shot. Hell maybe they should be excommunicated. That's child abuse, IMO.

I don't think that kind of response is typical based on my life experience. And based on the rest of the article, I'm highly suspicious it's a lie.

It's quite obvious we only have one side of the story. It would be interesting to hear her parent's side and see what type of behavior she exhibited around them. In some cases that I've seen from afar it was the apostates that burned the bridge initially.

[jay santos]

Hey! Strive to be nice with me!

You didn't write the article. It wasn't mean to you.