The Rexburg bubble

[UtahDan]

I would be willing to wager the majority of members if they saw another member show up in a nice pair of pants and a blue dress shirt wouldn't think a thing except maybe I wish I had the guts to do that.

Are there really places where colored shirts are so out of the norm? I wear them for ordinances and when nothing else is clean but that is about it.

[ERCougar]

I've posted some similar feelings on CB back in the day. We stress the uniform of the PH so much that when people come to church they feel totally out of place if they are not wearing a white shirt and tie with nice slacks. In my ward most PH holders wears suits and that includes the APH. When 12-17 year old kids come to church as investigators they feel out of place and they either conform or they don't come back.

I really wish we would be more lax on the uniform of the PH and on the whole Sunday dress for this matter. It won't change what I wear, but it will promote diversity among the ward and investigators will be able to blend in better and feel more comfortable. I'm sure they feel awkward being the only person wearing a polo in the whole congregation.

We get a lot of mileage out of this white shirt and tie thing but in reality, has anyone ever really been confronted? I rarely wear a white shirt and I can't recall a single time, outside of perhaps when I was a teenager and might have had an overzealous advisor (although really, I can't remember any specific time), when someone has actually said anything to me, looked at me funny, shunned me, or anything similar to it. Really, I don't think most people even notice what I'm wearing and if I feel a little uncomfortable, it's all self-imposed.

Of course, I keep wondering why I'm not the EQP. Maybe that's my answer.

EDIT: Looks like 71 already covered this. Well--what he said.

[UtahDan]

Of course, I keep wondering why I'm not the EQP. Maybe that's my answer.

Don't wonder about that, just keep doing whatever it is you are doing and you will stay off the hook.

[DapperDan]

So I'm sitting in HP group (yes I did go) and the talk turns to prop 8 and all these old guys are sitting around talking about how we love the homosexual and they are welcome in our church anytime they want. This coming from a group of guys that the closest they have come to being around someone who is gay is when they took their wives to a Liberace concert twenty five years ago. Everybody is this room had a white shirt on and I thought to myself that anybody that was just a little different wouldn't feel comfortable in this group let alone someone who is gay. Is part of the problem retaining new members that we just make so hard to fit in and why do we do this?

I had a discussion with family members over the weekend about issues I have with Church culture (actually started out as a football discussion about the Honor Code). I was told not to worry, because things will naturally change as the older generation dies out.

[RC Vikings]

I had a discussion with family members over the weekend about issues I have with Church culture (actually started out as a football discussion about the Honor Code). I was told not to worry, because things will naturally change as the older generation dies out.

Have you ventured over to CB lately? Their are a whole new crop of mullahs out there to fill the spots.

[jay santos]

I had a discussion with family members over the weekend about issues I have with Church culture (actually started out as a football discussion about the Honor Code). I was told not to worry, because things will naturally change as the older generation dies out.

I think there's a lot of truth to that. My live in what you'd think is typical upper middle class Utah County Mormon suburbia, but my ward is 100 times different than the ward I grew up in what would have been a comparable area of Utah County 20 years ago.

--Bishop and one counselor's wife works
--last two bishops wear shorts around town
--Diet Coke available at ward activities
--plenty of blue, yellow shirts on Sundays
--boob jobs
--avg family size 5 vs 9

etc. you get the idea.

[DapperDan]

Have you ventured over to CB lately? Their are a whole new crop of mullahs out there to fill the spots.

I actually did bring that up since the primary person I was talking to occasionally lurks on CB. However I was assured that since he had not met anyone like that in his last couple wards that it was an unnecessary concern.

[Sleeping in EQ]

I had a discussion with family members over the weekend about issues I have with Church culture (actually started out as a football discussion about the Honor Code). I was told not to worry, because things will naturally change as the older generation dies out.

I think you have to be willing to be part of the solution. Pick an aspect of unhealthy Church culture and decide not to conform to it. Many people will be indifferent to your action, a few will respect you for it, a handful might join you, and management types and wannabe management types will mark you down as a trouble maker.

There will be a price, but it's how change happens.

[DapperDan]

I think there's a lot of truth to that. My live in what you'd think is typical upper middle class Utah County Mormon suburbia, but my ward is 100 times different than the ward I grew up in what would have been a comparable area of Utah County 20 years ago.

--Bishop and one counselor's wife works
--last two bishops wear shorts around town
--Diet Coke available at ward activities
--plenty of blue, yellow shirts on Sundays
--boob jobs
--avg family size 5 vs 9

etc. you get the idea.

There is undoubtedly truth to it. The main difference we had was that I am of the opinion that the church should proactively work towards cultural reform, whereas his method is a little more lengthy.

For example, they could in one simple GC talk eliminate white/blue shirt, facial hair, etc discussions, but they choose not too.

[UtahDan]

There is undoubtedly truth to it. The main difference we had was that I am of the opinion that the church should proactively work towards cultural reform, whereas his method is a little more lengthy.

For example, they could in one simple GC talk eliminate white/blue shirt, facial hair, etc discussions, but they choose not too.

I imagine "they" are not in accord on either of those issues.

[DapperDan]

I think you have to be willing to be part of the solution. Pick an aspect of unhealthy Church culture and decide not to conform to it. Many people will be indifferent to your action, a few will respect you for it, a handful might join you, and management types and wannabe management types will mark you down as a trouble maker.

There will be a price, but it's how change happens.

Been there; done that. Problem is you have to be a straight enough arrow to pull that off and not just be discarded as a fringe individual. I know those who are and can, but I've never mullahed or faked mullahed well enough to sell it.

[SeattleUte]

At first I thought this thread was about real estate. I was wondering what that had to do with religion; maybe for not paying tithing Rexburg folks were being cursed with a bad economy.

[Green Monstah]

A group member and the teacher opened up about family members who were gay and how much they loved them and cared for them and I think it helped. You hit it right on about how our perception of things comes mainly from our life experiences.

It's true with me. I always felt that being gay distilled down to a choice, even if genetics and upbringing shifted the pendulum in a gay direction. My sister's ex-husband is gay, and I watched him try to be straight for a decade until everyone had to admit it wasn't going to work. I have no doubt he wanted nothing more than to be straight. He just wasn't.

This may be offensive to some, but I think this is where the Atonement of Christ comes in and makes up the difference (whether in this life or the next). After that experiences, I realized that there was too much I didn't understand about homosexuality to make judgments.

[Jeff Lebowski]

I find this a little strange. I didn't learn anything about my fellow ward members from Prop 8. I've rarely heard it mentioned in my large Utah ward. I certainly haven't seen any new homophobia crop up.

Thankfully it is a relatively small group. Unfortunately, the clueless ones tend to be the most vocal.

[Green Monstah]

I don't know, but don't think so. First of all, we don't send new members to the HP group.

Second of all, it depends on where you live. If my neighbor joins the church, we don't make it hard for him to fit in. He's not much different from us. he just needs to get a decent looking white or blue shirt and a few ties to wear to church. I don't think most people feel too uncomfortable at church just Because people wear their "sunday best", nor because they don't know a lot of gay people. I'm sure the few non-members in Rexburg have had little interaction with gay people.

Also, many of us have gone to and Elton John concert more recently than a Liberace concert.

They probably are the gay people. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!