I learned in church today

[Clark Addison]

The second counselor in our bishopric talked to day. Full disclosure, I've always thought this guy was a jerk.

He gave a wide-ranging talk on chastity. There were several interesting moments, but the biggest was when he mentioned seeing commercials for the HPV vaccine, and talked about how this was Satan's way to allow people to have sex without consequences. He said that he told his kids that he wouldn't be getting them that vaccine. If they were going to break the law of chastity, they would have to be able to handle the consequences.

I was listening to this in the primary room, where I was setting things up. My wife was sending me angry texts. The only part she liked was after he briefly harangued against gay marriage. My daughter was up on the stand because she had given a talk, and when he started talking about gay marriage she gave a large eye roll.

Oh, I forgot. He also said that birth control was from Satan.

He invoked Satan quite a bit in his talk.

[Parrot Head]

Oh, I forgot. He also said that birth control was from Satan.

He invoked Satan quite a bit in his talk.

I did enjoy when he said something along the lines of, "We save things for marriage so you don't... <long pause> do more." I can't imagine how I'd tackle a 15- to 20-minute sacrament talk on chastity -- probably all in metaphors or use of "hibbity-dibbity."

His wife is leading her annual salsa dancing combined activity in a week so we'll just hope that we can control those raging youthful hormones, packed so tightly together on a well-lit, poorly ventilated 3/4-basketball court.

[Moliere]

The second counselor in our bishopric talked to day. Full disclosure, I've always thought this guy was a jerk.

He gave a wide-ranging talk on chastity. There were several interesting moments, but the biggest was when he mentioned seeing commercials for the HPV vaccine, and talked about how this was Satan's way to allow people to have sex without consequences. He said that he told his kids that he wouldn't be getting them that vaccine. If they were going to break the law of chastity, they would have to be able to handle the consequences.

I was listening to this in the primary room, where I was setting things up. My wife was sending me angry texts. The only part she liked was after he briefly harangued against gay marriage. My daughter was up on the stand because she had given a talk, and when he started talking about gay marriage she gave a large eye roll.

Can you ask him for a copy of his talk? I'd like to read it verbatim.

Also, why is the 2C speaking in church? In our ward the bishopric never speaks except for ward conference or if a speaker doesn't show up, which has only happened once in the 8 years I've been in my ward.


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[Clark Addison]

Can you ask him for a copy of his talk? I'd like to read it verbatim.

Also, why is the 2C speaking in church? In our ward the bishopric never speaks except for ward conference or if a speaker doesn't show up, which has only happened once in the 8 years I've been in my ward.


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I will ask him for it.

Having a counselor talk is unusual. My guess is that the bishop felt the topic was important and sensitive and wanted one of his top men on it.

Maybe Parrothead was listening closer to me at the beginning and knows better. Plus he goes to Ward Council sometimes so he has better inside info than I, unless it is regarding primary music.

[cowboy]

The second counselor in our bishopric talked to day. Full disclosure, I've always thought this guy was a jerk.

He gave a wide-ranging talk on chastity. There were several interesting moments, but the biggest was when he mentioned seeing commercials for the HPV vaccine, and talked about how this was Satan's way to allow people to have sex without consequences. He said that he told his kids that he wouldn't be getting them that vaccine. If they were going to break the law of chastity, they would have to be able to handle the consequences.

I was listening to this in the primary room, where I was setting things up. My wife was sending me angry texts. The only part she liked was after he briefly harangued against gay marriage. My daughter was up on the stand because she had given a talk, and when he started talking about gay marriage she gave a large eye roll.

You know that everyone loves this guy. He's the crazy uncle whose antics give us something to talk/complain about in between holidays. I just feel sorry for his kids.

[Moliere]

You know that everyone loves this guy. He's the crazy uncle whose antics give us something to talk/complain about in between holidays. I just feel sorry for his kids.

Every bishopric needs a fire breather.


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[Katy Lied]

I can't imagine how I'd tackle a 15- to 20-minute sacrament talk on chastity -- probably all in metaphors or use of "hibbity-dibbity."

Spit take.

[Eddie]

This seemed like the best place for this...

https://www.facebook.com/LDSStanding...6328914084473/

[HuskyFreeNorthwest]

This seemed like the best place for this...

https://www.facebook.com/LDSStanding...6328914084473/

Must be made by the Studio C group!

[Topper]

I can't imagine how I'd tackle a 15- to 20-minute sacrament talk on chastity -- probably all in metaphors or use of "hibbity-dibbity."

So you don't think you would open with Chastity Belt's opening line from Pussy Weed Beer?

[Crockett]

Oh, I forgot. He also said that birth control was from Satan.

He invoked Satan quite a bit in his talk.

How many kids does he have?

[Pelado]

Oh, I forgot. He also said that birth control was from Satan.

He invoked Satan quite a bit in his talk.

Does he also believe, as we all should, that sexual intercourse should be reserved for procreative purposes only?

[Clark Addison]

How many kids does he have?

Two. He made a comment about not being able to have more, to prevent speculation that his progeny had been limited by artificial means.

Does he also believe, as we all should, that sexual intercourse should be reserved for procreative purposes only?

Not sure. Let me ask and get back to you. This is exactly why it should have been a 5th Sunday lesson: no opportunity for Q&A in a Sac Meeting talk.

[Crockett]

Two. He made a comment about not being able to have more, to prevent speculation that his progeny had been limited by artificial means.

If you are not getting pregnant at every possible window of opportunity, then you are practicing some form of birth control. I would estimate that 99.9% of Mormon women have used some form of it.

[Bo Diddley]

I really think in these military branches, where we get quite a few non-members to attend, we should probably suspend the regular curriculum and go with Gospel Principles. As it is, I'm sure going with three degrees in the Celestial Kingdom and we can become gods is a fun alternative.