The Official "SU Rant" Contest

[Jeff Lebowski]

Heh, Babs agrees with me re atheism vs. agnosticism. Game over.

LOL.

[I.J. Reilly]

Here is my entry. Hope everyone enjoys!

Situation: There is a heated 100+ response thread going on about the homosexuality and the church. The thread started with JohnnyLingo relating a story about a guy he had become friends with through his ward’s Tuesday morning basketball game. The guy had told Lingo that he had previously had homosexual feelings, and that they had delayed him from going on his mission, but through BYU’s program he had been able to be “cured” and was now married with a kid on the way.

Yeah and one day the whole world will embrace in a big group hug that the gays started. I just don’t see this happening SU. Sorry

This is exactly the sort of attitude that drove me from the bosom embrace of mormonism. Members that think that they know everything because God has revealed it to his “prophets” and has told them that the whole of humanity will end in some unimaginable calamity make it impossible to envision a world where people could actually love each other and live in harmony. For the same reason the mormon church can't accept homosexuals.

The positivism that Indy represents, and almost all mormons posses, can be seen in innumerable ways in the church. Take for example the word of “wisdom”. First of all, it really only reflects the sort of deviously derivative stuff that was JS’s trademark. The WoW is nothing more than a health code of the sort that would have been given by any run of the mill quack of the time. One of my muses, Augustine, knew more about health in AD 410 when he wrote, “Complete abstinence is easier than perfect moderation.”

Other examples include Mark E. Peterson and Bruce R. McConkie. I’m sure that they were sure that they were right about the despicable things they said about blacks when they said it. Then the “prophet” suggests that it might be different, years after Brown v. Board of Education, and the tune is changed. No introspection, no intelligence exerted on their part, just blind positivism taken from the mouth of the “prophet”.

This rant has gotten me perfectly worked up, but I don’t care. People like Indy, and the legion that agree with him, needed to hear it. Intelligent people agree with me that the whole mormon practice of blind obedience is nothing but a way to control the followers. When I get worked up like this I have to go to one of my favorite websites and read the quotes and reflect. http://richarddawkins.net/quotes I suggest you do the same, Indy; you might just learn something.


Bonus Sports-Related Post:

I freely admit that Utah has very little in the way of sports-related prowess pre-1990. However, their accomplishments since then have far outshone anything that BYU has done. You need only look at the supposed “championships” of the Bronco era and relate them to what Kyle Wittingham has accomplished to know that BYU fans are living in the past, and Utah fans actually have something to celebrate in the present.

[Babs]

I freely admit that Utah has very little in the way of sports-related prowess pre-1990.

SU would never say this. But this is an excellent idea. We need a whole category just for SU sports rants. Or for his commentary on pop music. This could be great fun!

[TripletDaddy]

SU would never say this. But this is an excellent idea. We need a whole category just for SU sports rants. Or for his commentary on pop music. This could be great fun!

he actually said this almost verbatim awhile back. It was part of my sig line for a bit, but then I grew tired of shooting fish in a barrel.

[Coach McGuirk]

SU is now stuck at work because of this thread, as his head is unable to fit through a doorway.

Order some delivery, SU.

[Babs]

he actually said this almost verbatim awhile back. It was part of my sig line for a bit, but then I grew tired of shooting fish in a barrel.

"freely admit"? That is so not SU. Pardon me if I remain unconvinced.

[SeattleUte]

Or the sure litmus test of an inspired volume of scripture!

Notice the tactical ambiguity of "inspired" here. 3D chooses his words carefully. You'll never hear him say he believes the said volume of scripture was "translated" from a gold book (excluding perhaps the parts copied from the KJV Bible) through magic spectaclies fastened to a Greco-Romanesque breast plate. Stay tuned for a "this is not the time or place" reply from 3D.

[I.J. Reilly]

SU would never say this. But this is an excellent idea. We need a whole category just for SU sports rants. Or for his commentary on pop music. This could be great fun!

You are obviously not a student of SU's postings

[YOhio]

This is exactly the sort of attitude that drove me from the bosom embrace of mormonism.

SU would never outsource his apostacy to the attitudes of others.

[SeattleUte]

You are obviously not a student of SU's postings

I did say that. I believe I said 1994, in fact. It's true. Utah has no football history to speak of before 1994. Lee Grosscup's Liberty Bowl win was the highlight. But I do believe that Utah has accompished more genuine achievement in 1994-2008 than BYU's entire history.

[Jeff Lebowski]

Notice the tactical ambiguity of "inspired" here. 3D chooses his words carefully. You'll never hear him say he believes the said volume of scripture was "translated" from a gold book (excluding perhaps the parts copied from the KJV Bible) through magic spectaclies fastened to a Greco-Romanesque breast plate. Stay tuned for a "this is not the time or place" reply from 3D.

Quit trying to win the contest. That is not fair!!!

That's an excellent post, IJR. A few more spelling errors would have upped the authenticity a touch. But solid overall.

[myboynoah]

Your eyes have been upon my servant Joseph Smith, Jun., and his language you have known, and his imperfections you have known; and you have sought in your hearts knowledge that you might express beyond his language; this you also know.

Now, seek ye out of the Book of Commandments, even the least that is among them, and appoint him that is the most wise among you;

Or, if there be any among you that shall make one like unto it, then ye are justified in saying that ye do not know that they are true;

But if ye cannot make one like unto it, ye are under condemnation if ye do not bear record that they are true.

[TripletDaddy]

I did say that. I believe I said 1994, in fact. It's true. Utah has no football history to speak of before 1994. Lee Grosscup's Liberty Bowl win was the highlight. But I do believe that Utah has accompished more genuine achievement in 1994-2008 than BYU's entire history.

Babes needs to bone up on HIStory and become a student of SeattleUte's posts (and Michael Jackson's anthology).

[RobinFinderson]

Notice the tactical ambiguity of "inspired" here. 3D chooses his words carefully. You'll never hear him say he believes the said volume of scripture was "translated" from a gold book (excluding perhaps the parts copied from the KJV Bible) through magic spectaclies fastened to a Greco-Romanesque breast plate. Stay tuned for a "this is not the time or place" reply from 3D.

I did say that. I believe I said 1994, in fact. It's true. Utah has no football history to speak of before 1994. Lee Grosscup's Liberty Bowl win was the highlight. But I do believe that Utah has accompished more genuine achievement in 1994-2008 than BYU's entire history.

Very impressive. See people? Being SU isn't as easy as it looks!

[Guest]

SU would never say this. But this is an excellent idea. We need a whole category just for SU sports rants. Or for his commentary on pop music. This could be great fun!

OT: Dropping the SU worship for a moment. I want a category for Landpoke's Friday night man-on-the-town posts..."Wiskey and Wifi" or something.