October 2019 General Conference

[Uncle Ted]

as JL said, if you answer yes or no, they aren't going to probe further. but for the sake of argument, lets say they do probe further - you just reiterate your yes or no answer.

SP: do you keep the WoW? UT: yes. SP: i mean, do you drink coffee? UT: i keep the word of wisdom.

or you could tell him to eff off.

if you choose the latter option, please return and report.

More like this:

SP: Do you understand and obey the WoW?

UT: Yeah.

SP: What is your understanding of the WoW?

UT: I understand was given in section 89 as not a commandment. Why are you shining those bright lights in my face, man?

[Pelado]

How many other caffeine delivery methods have you tried?

My delivery method the last couple days was straight from a 2-liter bottle of Cherry Coke. Gotta love deadlines.

[falafel]

Good heavens, you must be absolutely miserable living in Vegas.

What are you talking about? Utah is littered with fake boobs.

[Jeff Lebowski]

What are you talking about? Utah is littered with fake boobs.

Lol. Touche'.

[Pelado]

What are you talking about? Utah is littered with fake boobs.

Why is everyone discarding their fake boobs? Is that how they made Silicon Slopes?

[MartyFunkhouser]

Coffee and real boobs represent all that is good on this earth. They both warm the soul and wake you up. Fake boobs are just a cheap caricature, like Diet Mountain Dew.

This post is full of all the truth. I would like you to be my Prophet.

[Northwestcoug]

This post is full of all the truth. I would like you to be my Prophet.

First commandment, no meetups at Starbucks.

[clackamascoug]

Coffee and real boobs represent all that is good on this earth. They both warm the soul and wake you up. Fake boobs are just a cheap caricature, like Diet Mountain Dew.

What's the equivalent of pregnancy boobs?

Of all the boobs - them are the best.

[Katy Lied]

eating meat sparingly : Sparingly means without waste NOT very little

I'd like to call my husband to repentance then. He wastes a lot of food, including meat:

Refuses to eat leftovers
Refuses to eat "second dinner" entres made of leftovers including casseroles, curries and soups.
Refuses to let the dog eat leftover meat if it is older than 3 days
When he eats say, a chicken thigh, he takes three bites and tosses the meat encrusted bone. He really dislikes cleaning up by gnawing all of the meat off the bone. Clack, any advice here?

Say, do you think he would consider using prime ribeye in stir fry a waste?

[clackamascoug]

I'd like to call my husband to repentance then. He wastes a lot of food, including meat:

Refuses to eat leftovers
Refuses to eat "second dinner" entres made of leftovers including casseroles, curries and soups.
Refuses to let the dog eat leftover meat if it is older than 3 days
When he eats say, a chicken thigh, he takes three bites and tosses the meat encrusted bone. He really dislikes cleaning up by gnawing all of the meat off the bone. Clack, any advice here?

Say, do you think he would consider using prime ribeye in stir fry a waste?

You need to withhold marital relations until you can get your man to do what you want. That's the way of nature. But as an anti-gnawite, he sounds like a true celestial candidate to be sure.

[Sullyute]

You need to withhold marital relations until you can get your man to do what you want. That's the way of nature. But as an anti-gnawite, he sounds like a true celestial candidate to be sure.

Wow, I am on pins and needles waiting for Katy’s response to that ‘unique’ take.

[clackamascoug]

Wow, I am on pins and needles waiting for Katy’s response to that ‘unique’ take.

"Unique?" - There's not a man on here who hasn't experienced the benevolent quid pro quo of a successful marriage.

[Topper]

You need to withhold marital relations until you can get your man to do what you want. That's the way of nature. But as an anti-gnawite, he sounds like a true celestial candidate to be sure.

You are a bastard. What makes you think she hasn't already employed the nuclear option?

[Pelado]

You are a bastard. What makes you think she hasn't already employed the nuclear option?

Clack - is this true? Were your parents unmarried?

[clackamascoug]

Clack - is this true? Were your parents unmarried?

Your attempt at humor is a form of self gratification - where you think it's funny - but ultimately injurious to your intended target.

You can do better - you can be better - I've glimpsed at the goodness in you.