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  • #61
    What's with the camping and survival skills stuff? Is that for when the constitution fails and we are all living out of our food storage and sleeping in tents?
    Last edited by Moliere; 04-10-2015, 10:53 AM.
    "Discipleship is not a spectator sport. We cannot expect to experience the blessing of faith by standing inactive on the sidelines any more than we can experience the benefits of health by sitting on a sofa watching sporting events on television and giving advice to the athletes. And yet for some, “spectator discipleship” is a preferred if not primary way of worshipping." -Pres. Uchtdorf

    Comment

    • #62
      I've thought about it overnight, and I could really come up with an hours worth of topic.

      - If Jesus Christ's creations are "without number" what are the odds that he would be crucified on this particular Earth? MD Answer - One crucifiction, trillions of dimensions. (heavy emphasis on the grains of sand on the beaches around the world.)
      - Multiple marriage partners in Heaven. MD Answer - A trillion options begets a million wives.
      - Joseph Smith's various peccadilloes - MD Answer - With a trillion outplays of options he's bound to be squirrelly in some of the dimensions. (I could throw in that the Lord called him and Hyrum home early to save the Church.)
      - Resolving the Gay issue and the Church - We're all gay in another dimension. Give 'em (us) a break.
      - Becoming Omnipotent - MD Answer - Living out the consequences of every possible outcome of every decision.
      - Being Omnipresent - MD Answer - How you and your electrons can be in millions of different places at the same time.
      - The Forever Family - Being Sealed to Christ - How all of us are in this together.

      Throw in a little off-beat humor - add a couple of nuggets of mission stories, and bear my testimony at the end and I could be a bonafide hit.

      I'll be signing books after my speech in the lobby.
      Last edited by clackamascoug; 04-10-2015, 10:14 AM.

      Comment

      • #63
        Originally posted by Moliere View Post
        Or you can have a distant relative that was a general authority 20 years ago
        You're also a shoe-in if you are related to or studied with Cleon Skousen.
        "...you pointy-headed autopsy nerd. Do you think it's possible for you to post without using words like "hilarious," "absurd," "canard," and "truther"? Your bare assertions do not make it so. Maybe your reasoning is too stunted and your vocabulary is too limited to go without these epithets."
        "You are an intemperate, unscientific poster who makes light of very serious matters.”
        - SeattleUte

        Comment

        • #64
          Originally posted by Moliere View Post
          What's worth he camping and survival skills stuff? Is that for when the constitution fails and we are all living out of our food storage and sleeping in tents?
          Are there any classes on building large quantities of unregistered weapons and reloading your own bullets at home?

          I am not interested in the eating nuts and berries stuff. Does Mad Max live in a tent and eat nuts and berries?
          "If there is one thing I am, it's always right." -Ted Nugent.
          "I honestly believe saying someone is a smart lawyer is damning with faint praise. The smartest people become engineers and scientists." -SU.
          "Yet I still see wisdom in that which Uncle Ted posts." -creek.
          GIVE 'EM HELL, BRIGHAM!

          Comment

          • #65
            Originally posted by clackamascoug View Post
            I've thought about it overnight, and I could really come up with an hours worth of topic.

            - If Jesus Christ's creations are "without number" what are the odds that he would be crucified on this particular Earth? MD Answer - One crucifiction, trillions of dimensions. (heavy emphasis on the grains of sand on the beaches around the world.)
            - Multiple marriage partners in Heaven. MD Answer - A trillion options begets a million wives.
            - Joseph Smith's various peccadilloes - MD Answer - With a trillion outplays of options he's bound to be squirrelly in some of the dimensions. (I could throw in that the Lord called him and Hyrum home early to save the Church.)
            - Resolving the Gay issue and the Church - We're all gay in another dimension. Give 'em (us) a break.
            - Becoming Omnipotent - MD Answer - Living out the consequences of every possible outcome of every decision.
            - Being Omnipresent - MD Answer - How you and your electrons can be in millions of different places at the same time.
            - The Forever Family - Being Sealed to Christ - How all of us are in this together.

            Throw in a little off-beat humor - add a couple of nuggets of mission stories, and bear my testimony at the end and I could be a bonafide hit.

            I'll be signing books after my speech in the lobby.
            This whole MD thing just seems like one big deus ex machina
            "Discipleship is not a spectator sport. We cannot expect to experience the blessing of faith by standing inactive on the sidelines any more than we can experience the benefits of health by sitting on a sofa watching sporting events on television and giving advice to the athletes. And yet for some, “spectator discipleship” is a preferred if not primary way of worshipping." -Pres. Uchtdorf

            Comment

            • #66
              Jonathan Neville
              JAG Attorney, Author, Novelist, Church History Researcher, World Traveler

              David W. Allan
              World Renowned Physicist, Author, Instructor
              Wow, self-proclaimed. And no PhD.

              I think this is Sterling Allan's dad, who is a quite a nut-job, and was one of my mtc instructors.

              And my favorite, Jake Hilton


              You can't unsee that.
              I intend to live forever.
              So far, so good.
              --Steven Wright

              Comment

              • #67
                Originally posted by Brian View Post
                Jonathan Neville
                JAG Attorney, Author, Novelist, Church History Researcher, World Traveler

                David W. Allan
                World Renowned Physicist, Author, Instructor
                Wow, self-proclaimed. And no PhD.

                I think this is Sterling Allan's dad, who is a quite a nut-job, and was one of my mtc instructors.
                You mean the Sterling Allan who has been banned from all LDS properties?

                http://www.greaterthings.com/News/20...hool/#Resuming the McConkie Narrative

                who is a known free-energy scam artist?

                http://freeenergyscams.com/category/sterling-allan/

                and who may have been arrested for sexual abuse of a child?

                http://freeenergyscams.com/sterling-...or-pedophilia/

                I am not sure "nut job" begins to describe him in this case.
                "There is no creature more arrogant than a self-righteous libertarian on the web, am I right? Those folks are just intolerable."
                "It's no secret that the great American pastime is no longer baseball. Now it's sanctimony." -- Guy Periwinkle, The Nix.
                "Juilliardk N I ibuprofen Hyu I U unhurt u" - creekster

                Comment

                • #68
                  Originally posted by Jeff Lebowski View Post
                  You mean the Sterling Allan who has been banned from all LDS properties?

                  http://www.greaterthings.com/News/20...hool/#Resuming the McConkie Narrative

                  who is a known free-energy scam artist?

                  http://freeenergyscams.com/category/sterling-allan/

                  and who may have been arrested for sexual abuse of a child?

                  http://freeenergyscams.com/sterling-...or-pedophilia/

                  I am not sure "nut job" begins to describe him in this case.
                  yes, that guy.
                  wow, didn't know about his latest adventures...
                  wow.
                  I intend to live forever.
                  So far, so good.
                  --Steven Wright

                  Comment

                  • #69
                    Originally posted by Brian View Post
                    yes, that guy.
                    wow, didn't know about his latest adventures...
                    wow.
                    Looks liked he was exed 23 years ago. Partly because he attempted to walk up to the pulpit during general conference to give this talk:

                    http://www.greaterthings.com/Essays/Law_Word/

                    and was summarily escorted out by security and banned from church HQ. Holy cow.




                    EDIT: Details here:

                    http://www.greaterthings.com/Essays/...background.htm
                    Last edited by Jeff Lebowski; 04-10-2015, 12:16 PM.
                    "There is no creature more arrogant than a self-righteous libertarian on the web, am I right? Those folks are just intolerable."
                    "It's no secret that the great American pastime is no longer baseball. Now it's sanctimony." -- Guy Periwinkle, The Nix.
                    "Juilliardk N I ibuprofen Hyu I U unhurt u" - creekster

                    Comment

                    • #70
                      Originally posted by Moliere View Post
                      What's with the camping and survival skills stuff? Is that for when the constitution fails and we are all living out of our food storage and sleeping in tents?
                      During the march to Missouri. Duh.

                      Originally posted by Jeff Lebowski View Post
                      You mean the Sterling Allan who has been banned from all LDS properties?

                      http://www.greaterthings.com/News/20...hool/#Resuming the McConkie Narrative

                      who is a known free-energy scam artist?

                      http://freeenergyscams.com/category/sterling-allan/

                      and who may have been arrested for sexual abuse of a child?

                      http://freeenergyscams.com/sterling-...or-pedophilia/

                      I am not sure "nut job" begins to describe him in this case.
                      I'd be careful judging kids by their dads or dads by their kids.

                      Sometimes the nut doesn't fall far from the tree. Sometimes it really really does.

                      Comment

                      • #71
                        Originally posted by Moliere View Post
                        I wonder how much input Jeffrey R Holland had on the topics in this conference:
                        Oh man. That would totally be my jam!
                        I told him he was a goddamn Nazi Stormtrooper.

                        Comment

                        • #72
                          Originally posted by HuskyFreeNorthwest View Post
                          I don't know who that is, but if a Mormon speaker doesn't have a middle initial he isn't worth shit.
                          What if they go by their middle name with a first initial?

                          m-russell-ballard-large.jpg

                          Originally posted by Moliere View Post
                          What's with the camping and survival skills stuff? Is that for when the constitution fails and we are all living out of our food storage and sleeping in tents?
                          bingo-01.jpg
                          "I think it was King Benjamin who said 'you sorry ass shitbags who have no skills that the market values also have an obligation to have the attitude that if one day you do in fact win the PowerBall Lottery that you will then impart of your substance to those without.'"
                          - Goatnapper'96

                          Comment

                          • #73
                            Originally posted by Jeff Lebowski View Post
                            Looks liked he was exed 23 years ago. Partly because he attempted to walk up to the pulpit during general conference to give this talk:

                            http://www.greaterthings.com/Essays/Law_Word/

                            and was summarily escorted out by security and banned from church HQ. Holy cow.




                            EDIT: Details here:

                            http://www.greaterthings.com/Essays/...background.htm
                            Trying to disrupt GC? Some folks are so far in they bridge the gap with the kooks that are so far out. One eternal round.
                            Give 'em Hell, Cougars!!!

                            For all this His anger is not turned away, but His hand is stretched out still.

                            Not long ago an obituary appeared in the Salt Lake Tribune that said the recently departed had "died doing what he enjoyed most—watching BYU lose."

                            Comment

                            • #74
                              Originally posted by HuskyFreeNorthwest View Post
                              I don't know who that is, but if a Mormon speaker doesn't have a middle initial he isn't worth shit.
                              We dodged that bullet!

                              I told him he was a goddamn Nazi Stormtrooper.

                              Comment

                              • #75
                                Originally posted by Jeff Lebowski View Post
                                You mean the Sterling Allan who has been banned from all LDS properties?

                                http://www.greaterthings.com/News/20...hool/#Resuming the McConkie Narrative

                                who is a known free-energy scam artist?

                                http://freeenergyscams.com/category/sterling-allan/

                                and who may have been arrested for sexual abuse of a child?

                                http://freeenergyscams.com/sterling-...or-pedophilia/

                                I am not sure "nut job" begins to describe him in this case.
                                Sterling pled guilty to two counts of child sexual abuse (apparently the girls were toddlers when he abused them?):

                                http://www.heraldextra.com/news/local/crime-and-courts/fountain-green-man-pleads-guilty-to-sexually-abusing-two-toddler

                                The crime carries a minimum 15 year to life sentence. He gets two consecutive 15-year-to-life sentences and won't be eligible for parole for 22 years.

                                http://www.heraldextra.com/news/local/crime-and-courts/fountain-green-man-sentenced-to-possible-life-in-prison-for

                                So long, Sterling. I guess we won't see any more of his particular brand of crazy for a while.

                                Comment

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