What is a Utah Mormon?

[TripletDaddy]

I suspected your inherent altruism was at the root of this. You weren't car-jacked. You gave the guy your car. Hell, it was an excuse to upgrade, am I right?

I don't follow you. I didn't speak of any altruism.

[Pheidippides]

Yes. You will eventually soften up in stage four and then finally you will embrace your heritage in stage five.

If we can limit the embrace of my heritage to getting a cabin in Southern Utah, then bring it on!

[LA Ute]

This thread proves one thing at least: If Utah Mormons did not exist, non-Utah Mormons would have to invent them.

[Sullyute]

Apparently Slate magazine thinks that if you eat jello you are a Utah Mormon.

What, then, does a stereotype about Jell-O consumption do? It is notable that Utah became intimately linked in the national psyche with Jell-O consumption at a time when Mormonism began to exhibit a more open face to the world...

...Interestingly, explanations for this stereotype regularly link back to Mormons’ avoidance of alcohol, tea, and tobacco. In a nation where turning 21 is a rite of passage into adulthood, any group that willfully chooses to abstain is seen at best as odd and at worst as juvenile, unable to access the pleasures associated with adult life. The stereotype of Mormons as strangely enamored with Jell-O, a food intimately linked with the relatively powerless realms of womanhood and childhood, reinforces the perception of Mormons as childlike. Consuming Jell-O becomes a kitschy, naïve, infantile practice that on some level prevents Mormons from being taken seriously as full-fledged citizens.

In adopting and making Jell-O “their” food, Mormons (or Lutherans or Methodists) are making a statement about their identity, accepting all of the food’s positive connotations of family-friendliness, child-centeredness, and domesticity. Outsiders, in contrast, often look in and see Jell-O as a mark of a lack of taste that renders this group strange, immature, and ultimately mockable.

[FMCoug]

I forgot all about this thread and just re-read the whole thing. LMAO.

[Non Sequitur]

Apparently Slate magazine thinks that if you eat jello you are a Utah Mormon.

I don't really like Jello, but I have enjoyed Jello shots. That must be a California-Mormon thing.

[jay santos]

I forgot all about this thread and just re-read the whole thing. LMAO.

Nice bump. I forgot about this.

FMCOUG the most Utah Mormon on CUF haha.

[wuapinmon]

"I wrapped myself in Saran Wrap" LOLOLOL

[Tex]

This thread makes me want to revise and extend my Self-Loathing Mormon test.

[FMCoug]

If Utah Mormons are as bad as some here think they are, why are Utah Mormons the benchmark for what Mormons are?

This is ancient but I had to comment on this one. To the rest of Mormndom, Utah Mormons are the "Cousin Eddie" of the Mormon family.

[Indy Coug]

This is ancient but I had to comment on this one. To the rest of Mormndom, Utah Mormons are the "Cousin Eddie" of the Mormon family.

Who is Cousin Eddie?

[DU Ute]

This thread makes me want to revise and extend my Self-Loathing Mormon test.

I'm a 30. What does that mean?

[Indy Coug]

I'm a 30. What does that mean?

A disciplinary court is in your immediate future.

[FMCoug]

I'm clearly bored and avoiding work today. My wife just came in and we came up with 25 more additions:

1. At work, the new school principal brings up Relief Society. More than once.
2. Doesn't wear garments on vacation.
3. Doesn't let their kids have sleepovers, unless it is with one or more of their 457 cousins that live down the street.
4. Think that the family in the ward that is NOT somehow related to everybody else are the weird ones.
5. Carries their scriptures around with them in their car all the time.
6. Wouldn't think of missing any church meeting, regardless of time or conflicts with other things.
7. Has to make a centerpiece for their RS lesson
8. Freaks out when their daughter is invited to a boy/girl party for 15 year olds.
9. Insists that every kid on Trek has pioneer ancestry. Can't be convinced otherwise.
10. Avoids coffee, teas, and caffeinated beverages but has to have their Excedrin every morning.
11. As a married adult, has lived in their parents' basement.
12. Plan on having their married kids live in their basement.
13. Build a house in the backyard for their married kids.
14. When they find out the new members of the ward aren't related to somebody already in the ward, ask what they are doing here.
15. When temporarily forced to move away to the "mission field", pine away for Utah at every chance.
16. Wife and kids of mission field Utahns spend weeks or months at "home" every summer while Dad stays in Babylon.
17. Takes a giant pay cut to be able to move back to Utah when their kids become school age.
18. Freaks out about their 14 year old seeing "Marley and Me" while at your house.
19. Takes a 4-6 week maternity leave from Church.
20. Wouldn't think of harming their children with "dangerous" vaccines.
21. Won't send their HS kids to the 99% LDS public high school because of the bad influences.
22. Decides your 14 year old daugher is a bad influence because she calls your kid and wants to "hang out" instead of having a play date.
23. Thinks you're weird if you don't have a backyard vegetable garden.
24. Thinks THEY are Mormon Royalty because of their pioneer ancestry (fixed that one for you Wuap)
25. Thinks their 17 year old daughter's "really close guy friend" is not a boyfriend.

[FMCoug]

Who is Cousin Eddie?

#26. Doesn't know who Cousin Eddie is because those movies are sinful.

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