the possibility of not getting married scares me

[Maximus]

Many parts of my life scare me but this most of all. I find smart girls who are attractive to be intimidating and never ask them out. I fear loneliness and misery not having a family and don't have faith that it will work out frankly because I don't have faith in myself. And I don't know how to gain confidence to change that

Any one experience something similar? Advice?

Sorry for the soap box

[Viking]

change religions.

[wuapinmon]

Many parts of my life scare me but this most of all. I find smart girls who are attractive to be intimidating and never ask them out. I fear loneliness and misery not having a family and don't have faith that it will work out frankly because I don't have faith in myself. And I don't know how to gain confidence to change that

Any one experience something similar? Advice?

Sorry for the soap box

There are others here who waited or are waiting far longer than I had to (married at 24). I'll just say this, loneliness sucks, but only marry someone you love.

As for being intimidated, ask and ye shall receive (lots of no's, but eventually a yes).

[TripletDaddy]

I don't have any specific advice Maximus but I would politely suggest that people are generally good folks trying to live a good life. As such, we all deserve happiness and fulfillment. You deserve to be happy and find fulfillment. At the very least, you can find confidence in that. Best of luck to you and don't give up.

[Jacob]

Many parts of my life scare me but this most of all. I find smart girls who are attractive to be intimidating and never ask them out. I fear loneliness and misery not having a family and don't have faith that it will work out frankly because I don't have faith in myself. And I don't know how to gain confidence to change that

Any one experience something similar? Advice?

Sorry for the soap box

The easy answer would be to start dating and marry a girl who is not quite so smart and attractive. That's what most people do.

[TripletDaddy]

The easy answer would be to start dating and marry a girl who is not quite so smart and attractive. That's what most people do.

I see you are a sweet talker with the ladies

[wuapinmon]

The easy answer would be to start dating and marry a girl who is not quite so smart and attractive. That's what most people do.

Dating tips from Fox News?

[myboynoah]

My suggestion is that you just be yourself.

[EuropeanFootballMale]

Many parts of my life scare me but this most of all. I find smart girls who are attractive to be intimidating and never ask them out. I fear loneliness and misery not having a family and don't have faith that it will work out frankly because I don't have faith in myself. And I don't know how to gain confidence to change that

Any one experience something similar? Advice?

I know what you're talking about. I guess my only advice (and what I try and do) is to enjoy the perks of being single as much as you can while you are. It's nice having the freedom to do whatever you want whenever you want. As for how to find someone you want to marry, I got nothing.

[Portland Ute]

Bite the bullet and ask the smart attractive girls out.

My guess is that they are pretty lonely because too many guys feel the same way you do.

You ask out enough people in that "pool" and you are pretty likely to finally find love, beauty and smarts.

What's to fear other than some trial and error with a bunch of smart, pretty girls?

[DU Ute]

As for being intimidated, ask and ye shall receive (lots of no's, but eventually a yes).

Bingo. Get out there and get out of your comfort zone. I found a beautiful smart woman with a kind, understanding heart. I never thought I'd find someone so awesome. I never would have if I hadn't pushed past my own fears and self doubt. Just remember there are a lot of great girls out there with the same fears. Bridge that gap. You will find what you want if you look hard enough.

[Babs]

1. Fear of solitude is not an ideal impetus for courting. Learn to be comfortable being alone.

2. Women crave confidence and self-assurance. We can smell fear. Figure out what you're good at (you've clearly already got honesty and sensitivity going for you) and derive your confidence from that.

[SoCalCoug]

Many parts of my life scare me but this most of all. I find smart girls who are attractive to be intimidating and never ask them out. I fear loneliness and misery not having a family and don't have faith that it will work out frankly because I don't have faith in myself. And I don't know how to gain confidence to change that

Any one experience something similar? Advice?

Sorry for the soap box

Date attractive dumb girls. Gee, this is easy.

Seriously, I got married at 29. By 35, I'd resigned myself to an eternal marriage to someone who I was no longer in love with, and who was apparently never in love with me. At 39, after getting divorced, I finally married the perfect woman for me.

If I'd known then what I know now, I'd have realized most girls are every bit as insecure as I was. Just ask them out. If they say no, move on to the next one. There's no rush, despite what some may say.

[Viking]

Just act like this.

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[thesaint258]

1. Fear of solitude is not an ideal impetus for courting. Learn to be comfortable being alone.

2. Women crave confidence and self-assurance. We can smell fear. Figure out what you're good at (you've clearly already got honesty and sensitivity going for you) and derive your confidence from that.

This. I used to suck at dating. Finally, I got used to being alone and didn't let it stop me from living my life. I'd go to movies alone, out to dinner alone, etc. Then, things started working. Getting used to being yourself and being alone helps give you the confidence you need, and women will respond to that.