Tell me to settle down

[Katy Lied]

Something happened 4 days ago, and I've been sleeping on it, and I am still seething. I think it is terribly unfair, and I really want to go to my bishop about it.

I'm hoping cooler heads prevail, so I'm soliciting your advice. (AV)

This problem is indigenous to Utah, where the stakes and wards are crammed in on top of each other.

Our family is having a reunion, and we need a wardhouse and a field because we always play a competitive softball game. None of the wards in our stake have fields, but there is a really nice ward about 300 yards away from our house with a pavillion and a nice softball field. It belongs to the neighboring stake, even though it is closer than any ward in our stake.

We called to reserve this wardhouse, 6 months in advance. The facilities scheduler called us back and told us no. We asked if it was taken already, and were told yes. The way he said it was taken, with much stuttering and pausing, made it clear that it was not taken, we just couldn't reserve the building. So we asked for the day before or after, and were told that it was taken those days as well. It was obvious we were not going to get the reservation.

Here's the thing that irks me: our ward built that chapel. Each family was assessed a building fee, and it was our ward members who cleared that lot, and put up the fencing, and laid the turf, etc. Our ward got to use that building for services for the first year after it was built, then the boundaries were redrawn, and after building it, we had to go to a crappier ward further away. So we've always had an informal understanding that we could use the facility, and we do use it for HPG dinners and picnics.

Let me put forth their best argument:

1. Okay, so our ward built it- but that was about 8 years ago. How long does that stake have to let us use it?
2. If it is an official ward activity, I'm sure we could use it. They are just balking on private affairs.
3. Our ward no longer helps to maintain it, so 8 years is plenty of time for them to share with us..
4. The money and labor we contributed to building the wardhouse went straight to the Church, we have no say on how the church uses it now.

What has been your experiences with sharing church facilities?

[FMCoug]

Is this normally done at all? I thought private activities at church building were verboten. Why not just go to a park or other community / non-church facility?

It would never occur to me to have a Family Event at a church building.

[Jacob]

I say you are justified in your seething. Do you know anyone in the stake who might reserve it for you in their own name?

I've never reserved church property for family outings, though we've used them occasionally, so I don't know the protocol. But in this case, I think I'd go to the bishop and see what can be done. No need to just take it from the pencil pusher.

BTW, my ward building has both a pavilion and a soft-ball field. I've rarely seen either used, so I don't know why there would be any problem, though church activities should probably get priority. Anyway, if you want my to use my building in Davis County, I'll put in a reservation request.

[Jacob]

Is this normally done at all? I thought private activities at church building were verboten. Why not just go to a park or other community / non-church facility?

It would never occur to me to have a Family Event at a church building.

I don't get why you prefer use of one community picnic area to the other. Our buildings are woefully underused, IMO, and we paid for them, just like the city park.
Too bad they can't be used for school during the day. Imagine the savings in Utah!

[Katy Lied]

Is this normally done at all? I thought private activities at church building were verboten. Why not just go to a park or other community / non-church facility?

It would never occur to me to have a Family Event at a church building.

Yeah, maybe we should just go to the local Park.

[FMCoug]

I don't get why you prefer use of one community picnic area to the other. Our buildings are woefully underused, IMO, and we paid for them, just like the city park.
Too bad they can't be used for school during the day. Imagine the savings in Utah!

I never said I preferred it that way, I was just under the impression that was the policy.

[Surfah]

Settle down!

[Green Monstah]

Yeah, maybe we should just go to the local Park.

My family did that last reunion and it was a blast.

One of the tragedies of the modern church is that our facilities are often not to be used for non-Church activities, unless it's a way to lure unsuspecting goyim into a latent missionary blitz disguised as a community activity.

Just last week, my daughter's violin teacher (a Mormon) had a recital at the local Methodist Church. It was great. She tried getting permission to use our building but was denied. Oh well, the UMC had better acoustics anyway. I thought it was a shame that we were punting opportunities to be great neighbors to other more community-centered denominations.

[falafel]

Settle down!

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[TripletDaddy]

Please provide more info on this alleged "competitive" softball game. For example, do you hire umpires? Do you wear uniforms? Do both teams' have fairly comparable talent?

If the answer to any of these questions is no, then sorry but I don't think you are really playing competitive softball. Recreational softball, fine. But not competitive softball.

[CardiacCoug]

Sounds like the "facilities scheduler" is lying for the Lord. That's the part that bugs me.

Why on earth would he lie and say it's already reserved instead of just saying they don't allow private groups (or private groups not affiliated with the local wards) to reserve the field? Bizarre.

[kccougar]

I never said I preferred it that way, I was just under the impression that was the policy.

Church policy does not prohibit use of buildings/facilities for private family functions. Like wedding receptions, reunions, etc.

There is a policy against use of facilities for organized events like rec league practices, commerical piano recitals, etc.

[kccougar]

Sounds like the "facilities scheduler" is lying for the Lord. That's the part that bugs me.

Why on earth would he lie and say it's already reserved instead of just saying they don't allow private groups (or private groups not affiliated with the local wards) to reserve the field? Bizarre.

Not bizarre. He was probably just trying to avoid a confrontation and didn't have the guts to say, "Sorry, we won't let you do that".

[falafel]

Sounds like the "facilities scheduler" is lying for the Lord. That's the part that bugs me.

Why on earth would he lie and say it's already reserved instead of just saying they don't allow private groups (or private groups not affiliated with the local wards) to reserve the field? Bizarre.

He's probably just trying to avoid any possible anger by KL when he told her her ward can't use it. If he just says its reserved, there's nothing she can say.

[Green Monstah]

Church policy does not prohibit use of buildings/facilities for private family functions. Like wedding receptions, reunions, etc.

There is a policy against use of facilities for organized events like rec league practices, commerical piano recitals, etc.

Hmmmmm.....

I have been part of three non-commercial requests to use church buildings and have been denied all three times.

Maybe it's an unwritten or discretionary rule. Some groups are absolutely prohibited (e.g. homeschool groups).

Luckily, I'm still permitted to play basketball twice per week on the court.