Tamales Party

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  • wuapinmon
    Soul Plumber
    • Dec 2008
    • 30711

    #1

    Tamales Party

    So, for the third year in a row, we had our tamales party last night. We made the best tamales I've ever eaten, ever.



    I cooked 14 lbs of chicken (boneless breasts) at a low boil for about 8 hours, yielding probably a gallon of high-quality stock. About four hours before the party, I filled our portable roaster oven with dried corn husks (mazorca) and water and steeped them at 200F so that they would be soft and ready when the time came. We melted 3 lbs. of manteca (lard) in a pot, and we mixed about 2 quarts of the stock with an entire bag of Maseca Corn Meal for Tamales, 7 tsp of baking powder, and 4 2/3 cups of melted lard. We then had to mix the masa (dough) for about 10 minutes, by hand, until a small dough ball would float in water (you have to incorporate air into the mixture).



    Once the masa was ready, we shredded the chicken, mixed it with the green tomatillo/jalapeño mixture my friend made at home, formed the masa into small balls, then we pressed them, put the chicken mixture inside, put that into a corn husk, and then wrapped the whole thing up. When we had about 60-70 of them, we loaded them into my seafood steaming pot and steamed them at a high boil for about 70 minutes.



    They were outstanding (we made about 140 total). For sauces, some people used Sabemas Chilero, but everyone started using, and raving about, my Salsa Lizano from Costa Rica (a kind of creamy Worcestershire). I think I ate at least 10 last night.

    I also cooked 5 lbs of fried yuca (cassava root)--that all disappeared too.







    "Wuap's "problem" is that he is smart & principled & committed to a moral course of action. His actions are supposed to reflect his ethical code.
    The rest of us rarely bother to think about our actions." --Solon
  • Jeff Lebowski
    Corporate lackey for Jesus
    • Nov 2008
    • 69645

    #2
    Wow. Awesome.

    How many people come to your party?
    "There is no creature more arrogant than a self-righteous libertarian on the web, am I right? Those folks are just intolerable."
    "It's no secret that the great American pastime is no longer baseball. Now it's sanctimony." -- Guy Periwinkle, The Nix.
    "Juilliardk N I ibuprofen Hyu I U unhurt u" - creekster

    Comment

    • LA Ute
      Receiver of Memory
      • Nov 2008
      • 19512

      #3
      Originally posted by wuapinmon View Post
      So, for the third year in a row, we had our tamales party last night. We made the best tamales I've ever eaten, ever.
      A fond memory from my Christmas in Quezaltenango. Yours look exactly like the ones we had then. Yum. Tamales are easily had around here, along with pupusas, but the homemade ones are best.
      “There is a great deal of difference in believing something still, and believing it again.”
      ― W.H. Auden


      "God made the angels to show His splendour - as He made animals for innocence and plants for their simplicity. But men and women He made to serve Him wittily, in the tangle of their minds."
      -- Robert Bolt, A Man for All Seasons


      "It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye."
      --Antoine de Saint-Exupery

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      • CJF
        Senior Member
        • Nov 2008
        • 8497

        #4
        Looks delish, wuap. Nice job.
        A man who views the world the same at fifty as he did at twenty has wasted thirty years of his life. - Mohammad Ali

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        • pellegrino
          miserere me
          • Jan 2009
          • 12100

          #5
          looks like a fun time. one day you'll have to convert me to tamales as I've never been all that impressed with them. I'm assuming it's because they've been poorly made.
          Dio perdona tante cose per un’opera di misericordia
          God forgives many things for an act of mercy
          Alessandro Manzoni

          Knock it off. This board has enough problems without a dose of middle-age lechery.

          pelagius

          Comment

          • wuapinmon
            Soul Plumber
            • Dec 2008
            • 30711

            #6
            Originally posted by Jeff Lebowski View Post
            Wow. Awesome.

            How many people come to your party?
            24 last night.
            "Wuap's "problem" is that he is smart & principled & committed to a moral course of action. His actions are supposed to reflect his ethical code.
            The rest of us rarely bother to think about our actions." --Solon

            Comment

            • old_gregg
              scaly man fish
              • Nov 2009
              • 16915

              #7
              I didn't realize tamales were so much work. I'll stick to the taco cart.
              Te Occidere Possunt Sed Te Edere Non Possunt Nefas Est.

              Comment

              • Surfah
                Where's Wallace?
                • Nov 2008
                • 33726

                #8
                Originally posted by camleish View Post
                I didn't realize tamales were so much work. I'll stick to the taco cart.
                Ton of work. Which is why I always buy them. I just wish that there was someone here that made them and sold them locally.
                "Nobody listens to Turtle."
                -Turtle
                sigpic

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                • Donuthole
                  Official Outgayer
                  • Nov 2008
                  • 25258

                  #9
                  The Banana Man wraps his tamales in . . . . corn husks? Really?
                  Prepare to put mustard on those words, for you will soon be consuming them, along with this slice of humble pie that comes direct from the oven of shame set at gas mark “egg on your face”! -- Moss

                  There's three rules that I live by: never get less than twelve hours sleep; never play cards with a guy who's got the same first name as a city; and never go near a lady's got a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, everything else is cream cheese. --Coach Finstock

                  Comment

                  • MarkGrace
                    Grooveshark dick tease
                    • Dec 2008
                    • 31546

                    #10
                    I'll be making tamales with the in-laws on the 23rd. I both look forward to and dread this every year. Obviously homemade tamales rock and taste awesome, but they're just a shit ton of work.
                    So Russell...what do you love about music? To begin with, everything.

                    Comment

                    • pellegrino
                      miserere me
                      • Jan 2009
                      • 12100

                      #11
                      Originally posted by MarkGrace View Post
                      I'll be making tamales with the in-laws on the 23rd. I both look forward to and dread this every year. Obviously homemade tamales rock and taste awesome, but they're just a shit ton of work.
                      you're such a UT Mormon.
                      Dio perdona tante cose per un’opera di misericordia
                      God forgives many things for an act of mercy
                      Alessandro Manzoni

                      Knock it off. This board has enough problems without a dose of middle-age lechery.

                      pelagius

                      Comment

                      • MarkGrace
                        Grooveshark dick tease
                        • Dec 2008
                        • 31546

                        #12
                        Originally posted by pellegrino View Post
                        you're such a UT Mormon.
                        I'm looking at definitions on urban dictionary right now and they're cracking me up.

                        Widely adaptable large unit of measure. Generally speaking, take an amount of something that an average person may have and add a shitload more to it. This results in a shit-ton.
                        Defined literally as 20 hundredshits, where one hundredshit equals 112 shits in the Imperial System (long or gross hundredshit) and 100 shits in the U.S. System (short or net hundredshit). Furthermore, a shit-ton-force refers to 2,000 shit forces, which is a hell of a lot (i.e. a shit-ton) of Newtons.
                        A Shit-ton is equivalent to 24 metric assloads, or 1/10th of a fuck-ton.

                        Used to measure un-quantifiable amounts of something. Although it can be used in the measurement of very large people it actually is not a unit of weight.
                        The average American Male weighs 189.8lbs, a ton is 2000lbs, so a ton of humans is 2000/189.8=10.5 people. If human fecal matter is .27lbs on average, then for a ton of men, a Shit-Ton is 2.8 people, or 538.4lbs. This number is also attainable by taking 2000, the number of lbs in a Shit-Ton, and multiplying .2692 pounds, yielding 538.4, the average weight of a Shit-Ton. With two different formula's yielding identical answers, I here by submit the average weight of a Shit-Ton to be 538.4 pounds.
                        So Russell...what do you love about music? To begin with, everything.

                        Comment

                        • pellegrino
                          miserere me
                          • Jan 2009
                          • 12100

                          #13
                          Originally posted by MarkGrace View Post
                          I'm looking at definitions on urban dictionary right now and they're cracking me up.
                          pretty good definitions, but I have a Canadian colleague in linguistics who dated a Utahn (also a linguist) and she asks me about things all the time "shit ton" is one of them. Apparently it's a prevalent term used in the Mormon Corridor, especially the Wasatch Front.
                          Dio perdona tante cose per un’opera di misericordia
                          God forgives many things for an act of mercy
                          Alessandro Manzoni

                          Knock it off. This board has enough problems without a dose of middle-age lechery.

                          pelagius

                          Comment

                          • MarkGrace
                            Grooveshark dick tease
                            • Dec 2008
                            • 31546

                            #14
                            Originally posted by pellegrino View Post
                            pretty good definitions, but I have a Canadian colleague in linguistics who dated a Utahn (also a linguist) and she asks me about things all the time "shit ton" is one of them. Apparently it's a prevalent term used in the Mormon Corridor, especially the Wasatch Front.
                            What about shitload? I just used that in the movies thread instead of being redundant with shit ton.
                            So Russell...what do you love about music? To begin with, everything.

                            Comment

                            • Uncle Ted
                              The Big 12 money shot.
                              • Apr 2010
                              • 28853

                              #15
                              Originally posted by wuapinmon View Post
                              They were outstanding (we made about 140 total). For sauces, some people used Sabemas Chilero, but everyone started using, and raving about, my Salsa Lizano from Costa Rica (a kind of creamy Worcestershire). I think I ate at least 10 last night.
                              I love tamales and these look good. The thing is because these take so much time to make you have to mix up a shit ton of them to make it worth it. Otherwise I just make a late night run to Taco Bueno to get some.

                              Edit: Disclaimer... I lived in Utah while I was in school so I may have picked up on some of the local language there.
                              Last edited by Uncle Ted; 12-18-2011, 10:08 PM.
                              "If there is one thing I am, it's always right." -Ted Nugent.
                              "I honestly believe saying someone is a smart lawyer is damning with faint praise. The smartest people become engineers and scientists." -SU.
                              "Yet I still see wisdom in that which Uncle Ted posts." -creek.
                              GIVE 'EM HELL, BRIGHAM!

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