SFC James E. Thode

[Bo Diddley]

It was two years ago today that Doc gave his life in service to our country. I was very fortunate to know him and call him a friend. He was our very best, and I'm a better man for knowing him. Rest in peace, Doc! You'll never be forgotten.

[UtahDan]

Sorry for your loss Bo.

[New Mexican Disaster]

Losing comrades is the hardest part of serving in the military I venture to guess.

[Bo Diddley]

Five years ago, a good friend of mine, Sergeant First Class James Thode (Doc) was killed in Khost, Afghanistan. His unit had the unenviable task of route clearance. Their job was to find and remove any threats along the routes like improvised explosive devices. On December 2, 2010, Doc was killed by one of the IEDs they found.

My world was rocked when I got the phone call from Sapper J. The next several days were and remain a fog to me. The funeral was in Farmington, New Mexico. The flag draped casket seemed to me to be slightly undersized, as if, because of the heavy damage from the IED, he didn’t need a regular sized casket, thus underscoring his violent end. I haven’t been able to fully wrap my head around the whole thing.

Anguish. Anger. Hate.

I’ve spent the morning reviewing emails and pictures he sent back from Afghanistan, and just generally contemplating what his sacrifice meant in real tangible terms. I have to say that there are no easy answers to that question.

[old_gregg]

sorry man, and i know some will roll their eyes at my saying this, but thanks for the service of you and your friends. your sacrifice is appreciated.

[Bo Diddley]

Thanks. I consider it a privilege to serve, and love my job too much to do anything else. And people really treat us great. Just yesterday I was out at lunch and some anonymous person picked up the bill.

[TripletDaddy]

i hope nobody rolls their eyes at that sentiment. People can differ with the government but our soldiers deserve support and thanks.

I saw a bumper sticker the other day that made me laugh. It read, "If you can't stand behind our troops, feel free to stand in front of them!" It is probably a well-known saying but I had never seen it before.

[imanihonjin]

sorry man, and i know some will roll their eyes at my saying this, but thanks for the service of you and your friends. your sacrifice is appreciated.

Who would roll their eyes at that? I agree, thank you , Bo, for your service.

[Clark Addison]

I am really sorry about your friend. You are doing good by helping to keep his memory alive.

[smokymountainrain]

sorry man, and i know some will roll their eyes at my saying this, but thanks for the service of you and your friends. your sacrifice is appreciated.

that's a pretty bizarre comment, but I echo the latter part of the sentence and join in thanking you for your service, Bo. You're fortunate to love your job and have the opportunity to serve.

[wuapinmon]

that's a pretty bizarre comment, but I echo the latter part of the sentence and join in thanking you for your service, Bo. You're fortunate to love your job and have the opportunity to serve.

It's only bizarre because he didn't understand something I said in another thread. Thanking someone you know is different than thanking soldiers you don't know that you happen upon in public. I have no problem thanking friends who are soldiers, sailors, and Marines for their service; I do have a problem with a de rigeur thanking of any and every soldier I see for the reasons that will follow herein. I don't really know Bo well enough to thank him for what he did. It'd be an empty gesture on my part, even if I meant it--I would mean it, but what would it 'mean,' ultimately. My expression of gratitude will not remove the sting in his heart, the anguish in his mind, the hatred, the constant revisiting of things, and the questioning of the purpose of his friend's death that he's expressing in this thread. I can offer my sympathy and regret that he is feeling this way, but that might smack of insincerity or appear tinged with a political intent that I don't intend, but that he might perceive. So, I don't thank him merely because I don't want to make him annoyed or angry with me when he's clearly hurting. The empty words of a thank you to him would probably only serve to help me assuage my guilt over having supported the mission to Afghanistan originally, causing his friend to be dead today and him here grieving over "just generally contemplating what his sacrifice meant in real tangible terms." I'd much rather anonymously pick up the bill for his lunch than walk up to him and make him acknowledge my thanks (Matthew 6:3).

So, Bo, man, I won't say thank you unless we get to be friends someday, and my thanks means something to you. Maybe it would right now. If so, let me know, and I'll offer it privately and from my heart. But, I won't presume that me saying, "Thank you for your service" means much of anything to you until we're friends in real life. I've had hundreds of veterans who are students, and I've asked most of them whether they wanted people to thank them, and they said it made them uncomfortable when strangers did it, unless they could tell that the stranger was a veteran too. Since I'm not one, I'll shut up now.

[San Juan Sun]

Thanks Bo. And thank you James.

[Moliere]

Sorry for your loss Bo but thanks for sharing.

[Bo Diddley]

I appreciate all the thoughts expressed. CS presented another mode for me to be able to verbalize and express what I was keeping inside otherwise. It helped.

Wuap, I appreciate your honest and articulated thoughts. Let me give you just one soldier's point of view. It's not something we talk about to each other much, so I couldn't tell you what the average soldier thinks. I do get thanked quite often when I'm out in public in uniform. I don't remember people doing this very often before 9/11. It took a little getting used to at first. It was a little awkward at first, but people seem sincere, so I appreciate what they're trying to express. Actually, if I can tell they're a veteran from say WWII, I feel more awkward about it. I mean those guys are the rock stars of all veterans. Perhaps a little more awkward for me is when someone pays for my meal. I do appreciate the gesture, but my pride gets to me a little.

I didn't know how to respond at first, but I've come up with three responses that I choose from. It's an honor to serve. It's a privilege to serve. Thank you for your support. And then if I happen to be out with my wife I'll deflect the expression somewhat by pointing to my wife and saying that she's the real hero. So I'd be interested to hear from others how they'd respond to any of those three responses if they were to get that from me.

[Surfah]

I appreciate all the thoughts expressed. CS presented another mode for me to be able to verbalize and express what I was keeping inside otherwise. It helped.

Wuap, I appreciate your honest and articulated thoughts. Let me give you just one soldier's point of view. It's not something we talk about to each other much, so I couldn't tell you what the average soldier thinks. I do get thanked quite often when I'm out in public in uniform. I don't remember people doing this very often before 9/11. It took a little getting used to at first. It was a little awkward at first, but people seem sincere, so I appreciate what they're trying to express. Actually, if I can tell they're a veteran from say WWII, I feel more awkward about it. I mean those guys are the rock stars of all veterans. Perhaps a little more awkward for me is when someone pays for my meal. I do appreciate the gesture, but my pride gets to me a little.

I didn't know how to respond at first, but I've come up with three responses that I choose from. It's an honor to serve. It's a privilege to serve. Thank you for your support. And then if I happen to be out with my wife I'll deflect the expression somewhat by pointing to my wife and saying that she's the real hero. So I'd be interested to hear from others how they'd respond to any of those three responses if they were to get that from me.

Oohrah.