How orthodox were you as a missionary

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  • grapevine
    Senior Member
    • Apr 2009
    • 1985

    #1

    How orthodox were you as a missionary

    When I first went out was told not to stress over the rules. Good advice as people like that care more about policies than people and are hard to work with sometimes. I do know of missionaries with nervous breakdowns stressing over everything in the mission field. Those that are upset over waiting too long for tradeoffs to show up, staying 61 minutes at dinner, losing sight for a few seconds, going berserk.

    One ap came to a zone development meeting and said we will write in our white weekly every time we get done with an activity we will not murmur and you will do this you will do that. I was determined not to do anything to show him. Quoted the 121st section of the Doctrine and Covenants though he did not live it. Said we lost trust when baptisms went down. Heard he told people that didn't do weeklies basically writing everything they did every second they didn't have strong testimonies.

    APs that went out of there way to keep rules heard were told by GA not to aspire to positions.

    There are reasons for rules. But I would not pass up desert to keep the hour rule unless I had somewere to go. Those without people skills hurt the work more I think. Once when an ap said you are only there for an hour I reminded him a former comp of times he was there longer. Said wasn't rude like possibly aspiring ap. Another miss said that was right.

    I mean Keep rules but no reason to stress over them or freak out over them. Some were as bad as they could be without being sent home. Some thought rules were stupid don't follow such as dressing up for pday to go shopping. I know missionaries that ran into mps wife dressed like that left in a hurry. And a few unfortuntly to get sent home for rules breaches if they are on probation. Has to be repeated or pretty bad to be sent home. But are there those that stressed so much lost purpose. I wanted to keep most rules but didn't freak out over it. Would not refuse to go in home alone of opposite sex though I tried to avoid it in advance. Tell someone to shut off tv. Did shop during week at times. Some how bad can they be and be good others don't freak out others disobedient.

    How straighlaced were you with mission rules.
    64
    Went out of my way to keep every mission rule with exactness regarldless of consequence.
    14.06%
    9
    Kept them but did not stress over them
    53.13%
    34
    Kept the rules I felt like.
    26.56%
    17
    Was as bad as I could be without being sent home.
    1.56%
    1
    Was so bad I got sent home.
    4.69%
    3
  • Donuthole
    Official Outgayer
    • Nov 2008
    • 25236

    #2
    I think the most upset I ever got on my mission was when we were caught in a rain storm on our way to our mamita's house. Our schedule was to eat dinner at 9:30 p.m. after our day's work had ended. Well, we ended up getting there at about 9:55. We had just hiked about 3 miles in the pouring rain, were soaked to the bone, and our mamita had a nice plate of beans, eggs, fried plantains, and MorCafe (burnt-corn coffee) waiting for us. We started eating, and my companion got up after two minutes and said "Elder, let's go. We've got to be in our house by 10:00."

    I knew he was a straight arrow, but I was seriously shocked. I told him I would go home when I had completed my meal, and he turned and left without me. I got up to go after him, then decided I didn't care and sat back down to finish eating. When I got back to our house, he had the mission president on the line. The mission president gave me a mini lecture about never leaving my companion (he left me!) and then said he understood why I didn't want to leave my uneaten meal, and try to work it out with Elder Vargas.

    It was all I could do not to beat the crap out of Vargas that night.
    Prepare to put mustard on those words, for you will soon be consuming them, along with this slice of humble pie that comes direct from the oven of shame set at gas mark “egg on your face”! -- Moss

    There's three rules that I live by: never get less than twelve hours sleep; never play cards with a guy who's got the same first name as a city; and never go near a lady's got a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, everything else is cream cheese. --Coach Finstock

    Comment

    • CardiacCoug
      вот так штука
      • Nov 2008
      • 11013

      #3
      Originally posted by Donuthole View Post
      I think the most upset I ever got on my mission was when we were caught in a rain storm on our way to our mamita's house. Our schedule was to eat dinner at 9:30 p.m. after our day's work had ended. Well, we ended up getting there at about 9:55. We had just hiked about 3 miles in the pouring rain, were soaked to the bone, and our mamita had a nice plate of beans, eggs, fried plantains, and MorCafe (burnt-corn coffee) waiting for us. We started eating, and my companion got up after two minutes and said "Elder, let's go. We've got to be in our house by 10:00."

      I knew he was a straight arrow, but I was seriously shocked. I told him I would go home when I had completed my meal, and he turned and left without me. I got up to go after him, then decided I didn't care and sat back down to finish eating. When I got back to our house, he had the mission president on the line. The mission president gave me a mini lecture about never leaving my companion (he left me!) and then said he understood why I didn't want to leave my uneaten meal, and try to work it out with Elder Vargas.

      It was all I could do not to beat the crap out of Vargas that night.
      Funny. I had a companion who happened to be a Navajo Elder who would always just leave the apartment on his own to go buy food while I was studying in the morning. We worked in the mission office together and he would also just leave the office and go back to the apartment whenever he felt like he was done and would never wait for me if I wanted to finish something up. I was too much of a goody-goody to ever just walk off and leave my companion, but I never reported him or complained when he left me.

      Comment

      • Drunk Tank
        Senior Member
        • Apr 2009
        • 2569

        #4
        I got sent home, but I chose #2, mainly because I was not "so bad". I was a decent elder up to the point I made some wrong choices. I kept the mission rules in general, but I did not stress over them. I really tried to enjoy my mission, and sometimes I stretched the rules a bit. I had some companions that were so stressed out and anal retentive, that it made the mission seem unbearable. It really wore on the companionships at times. I went out of my way to try to make my companions relax and de-stress. Sometimes this included stretching rules a bit, but not often. I just felt we could do more for the people we were teaching if we enjoyed what we were doing. I mean, there is absolutly no reason to go out and tract when you have a 100+ fever and look like shit. It was hard to convince some companions that we need to take care of ourselves before we can take care of our investigators.
        "I can get a good look at a T-bone by sticking my head up a bull's a$$, but I'd rather take a butcher's word for it". - Tommy Callahan III

        Comment

        • Drunk Tank
          Senior Member
          • Apr 2009
          • 2569

          #5
          It is funny though, because as a mission, we were very relaxed on the rules in general. My first mission president was very strait laced, but my second mission president was much more relaxed. He would have barbecues and movie parties for the top baptising companionships, he let us listen to music of our choice as long as we could honestly feel the spirit. We had paintball guns, rollerblades (yes, I used them instead of a bike for a while), and other amenities that other mission presidents would have frowned upon. Our sister mission in New Jersey was uber-strict. We went on splits between missions and it was a night/day difference. All the missionaries seemed depressed and beaten down. They called us "apostate", but we were out-baptising them 2-1.
          "I can get a good look at a T-bone by sticking my head up a bull's a$$, but I'd rather take a butcher's word for it". - Tommy Callahan III

          Comment

          • Fiyero
            Banned
            • Nov 2008
            • 5266

            #6
            Originally posted by Donuthole View Post
            We started eating, and my companion got up after two minutes and said "Elder, let's go. We've got to be in our house by 10:00."
            At 10 pm one evening, we were asked to go to the hospital to administer a blessing. The caller had already tried other priesthood channels but couldn't get ahold of anyone, and asked us to do it. My companion freaked out about breaking a rule. I asked him to think outside of the box about what is the very purpose of the priesthood, missionary service, and general care for all mankind, but he kept droning on about not being able to fill in every X on that day's Exact Obedience chart.

            We didn't get home until midnight, and I told him since it is important for God's servants to be prepared, we should get our 8 hours of sleep so change the alarm to 8 am.

            Comment

            • pellegrino
              miserere me
              • Jan 2009
              • 12100

              #7
              Originally posted by Fiyero View Post
              At 10 pm one evening, we were asked to go to the hospital to administer a blessing. The caller had already tried other priesthood channels but couldn't get ahold of anyone, and asked us to do it. My companion freaked out about breaking a rule. I asked him to think outside of the box about what is the very purpose of the priesthood, missionary service, and general care for all mankind, but he kept droning on about not being able to fill in every X on that day's Exact Obedience chart.

              We didn't get home until midnight, and I told him since it is important for God's servants to be prepared, we should get our 8 hours of sleep so change the alarm to 8 am.

              ROFL, you had an obedience chart?
              Dio perdona tante cose per un’opera di misericordia
              God forgives many things for an act of mercy
              Alessandro Manzoni

              Knock it off. This board has enough problems without a dose of middle-age lechery.

              pelagius

              Comment

              • CardiacCoug
                вот так штука
                • Nov 2008
                • 11013

                #8
                Originally posted by pellegrino View Post
                ROFL, you had an obedience chart?
                Sounds like something for a 5-year old, huh?

                Comment

                • Non Sequitur
                  Where did I put my bodkin
                  • Nov 2008
                  • 5773

                  #9
                  I didn't obey many rules. Never got up before 9:00. Never did companionship prayer or scripture study. Spent a lot of time on the beach without the companion. Went to countless movies. Never read scriptures (I've still not read past Nephi II). But I was one of the highest baptizing Elders in the mission. Enjoyed several leadership positions (the Mission President turned his head). I learned early on that there is zero correlation between obeying the rules and baptizing. It's all sales. The rules are pretty much irrelevant.
                  "The mind is not a boomerang. If you throw it too far it will not come back." ~ Tom McGuane

                  Comment

                  • wuapinmon
                    Soul Plumber
                    • Dec 2008
                    • 30711

                    #10
                    Originally posted by CardiacCoug View Post
                    Sounds like something for a 5-year old, huh?
                    Complete with stickers....with Elmo on them.
                    "Wuap's "problem" is that he is smart & principled & committed to a moral course of action. His actions are supposed to reflect his ethical code.
                    The rest of us rarely bother to think about our actions." --Solon

                    Comment

                    • Fiyero
                      Banned
                      • Nov 2008
                      • 5266

                      #11
                      Originally posted by pellegrino View Post
                      ROFL, you had an obedience chart?
                      Yeah one month the MP sent out Exactness Obedience charts and said if every missionary in the mission filled out every X on every day that month, he promised that mission baptisms would double. Now I don't know what the odds are of 160 somewhat honest young'uns, some of whom had actual testimonies, all obeying every rule on every day for 31 consecutive days, perhaps it is a number like the sands of the sea, to one?

                      And he wanted everyone to bring their charts to that month's interviews.

                      Baptisms increased by something like 25% (from 40 to 50), so he decided every month would be Exactness Obedience month. We had these monthly charts to fill out every day. They were things like "out of the apartment from 9:30 am to 9:30 pm." He wanted us to pack meals and plan the day so we were out for 12 consecutive hours.

                      Comment

                      • pellegrino
                        miserere me
                        • Jan 2009
                        • 12100

                        #12
                        Originally posted by Fiyero View Post
                        Yeah one month the MP sent out Exactness Obedience charts and said if every missionary in the mission filled out every X on every day that month, he promised that mission baptisms would double. Now I don't know what the odds are of 160 somewhat honest young'uns, some of whom had actual testimonies, all obeying every rule on every day for 31 consecutive days, perhaps it is a number like the sands of the sea, to one?

                        And he wanted everyone to bring their charts to that month's interviews.

                        Baptisms increased by something like 25% (from 40 to 50), so he decided every month would be Exactness Obedience month. We had these monthly charts to fill out every day. They were things like "out of the apartment from 9:30 am to 9:30 pm." He wanted us to pack meals and plan the day so we were out for 12 consecutive hours.
                        Unbelievable, simply unbelievable. I wouldn't have done it and if someone had tried to use the commitment pattern to get me to do it I'd have packed up and left. I find the use guilt as a motivator to be reprehensible.
                        Dio perdona tante cose per un’opera di misericordia
                        God forgives many things for an act of mercy
                        Alessandro Manzoni

                        Knock it off. This board has enough problems without a dose of middle-age lechery.

                        pelagius

                        Comment

                        • Shaka
                          Senior Member
                          • Dec 2008
                          • 10438

                          #13
                          For the most part I kept the rules but if necessity dictated I would break them.

                          I had a low tolerance for my fellow elders who believed a leadership calling gave them the mandate to throw their authority around.

                          Comment

                          • il Padrino Ute
                            Junior Member
                            • Nov 2008
                            • 19161

                            #14
                            Mission rules are merely suggestions.

                            My mission president replaced the gentleman who would have been my mission president had he not died three months before I arrived.

                            My first companion told me that morale in the mission plummeted within the first month that this gentleman had arrived because he was a letter-of-the-law³ kind of guy and was so strict about enforcing his rules that a number of the missionaries - both elders and sisters - were sent home for things like leaving the apartment not dressed in mission attire on P-Day.

                            Everything was to be done on P-day; from cleaning the apartment to doing laundry to shopping for the entire week (some of the apartments only had the small fridges that you'd find in a motel room). He told the missionaries that they were there to baptize, not experience the culture or see the country. Some of the missionaries honestly believed that the Lord called this particular MP home in order to improve the morale.

                            The MP who I served with was the complete opposite. He told each missionary to pick a day during the week to do his/her laundry - put it in the washing machine when you left in the morning then hang it to dry when you got back for lunch in the early afternoon. He suggested that whomever was assigned to cook should do the shopping that day on the way home for lunch (that's the big meal of the day in Italy) and buy everything fresh at the market.

                            My MP considered P-day sacred; it was the day that gave everyone a break from being a missionary so they could experience all that Italy had to offer as far as culture and touring to see the sites in the vicinity of the city in which you were serving. He encouraged all to hop on a bus or train on P-Day and go see something new each week. Morale instantly improved and in his first 4 months, there were more baptisms than in the previous 2 years in that mission combined.

                            Anyway, I'm digressing, but I took full advantage of my MP's more relaxed way of running a mission. I bent his lax rules as far as I could even to the point of ignoring some of the basic mission rules like not entering the apartments of the sisters if it's not for the purpose of administring a blessing. I've mentioned it before, but my MP did tell me that he called me as an AP in order to keep an eye on me.

                            Npobody was sent home by my MP because the missionaries all felt that he trusted them to do the right thing and they didn't want to disappoint him, so nobody did anything that would get them sent home.

                            I honestly believe that only murder or fornication would have been enough to send a missionary home. There was one elder who witnessed his companion masturbating one night and immediately called the MP. The MP only told the elder "thanks for letting me know." That was it until the next zone conference when the MP said "Elders - and Sisters too - you were called to serve a mission here in Italy. While here, you are on the Lord's time. Masturbate on your time - which isn't until you've completed the mission."

                            Now I'm rambling, so I'll stop.
                            "Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance and the gospel of envy; its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill


                            "I only know what I hear on the news." - Dear Leader

                            Comment

                            • FMCoug
                              Senior Member
                              • Nov 2008
                              • 6825

                              #15
                              Originally posted by Donuthole View Post
                              I think the most upset I ever got on my mission was when we were caught in a rain storm on our way to our mamita's house. Our schedule was to eat dinner at 9:30 p.m. after our day's work had ended. Well, we ended up getting there at about 9:55. We had just hiked about 3 miles in the pouring rain, were soaked to the bone, and our mamita had a nice plate of beans, eggs, fried plantains, and MorCafe (burnt-corn coffee) waiting for us. We started eating, and my companion got up after two minutes and said "Elder, let's go. We've got to be in our house by 10:00."

                              I knew he was a straight arrow, but I was seriously shocked. I told him I would go home when I had completed my meal, and he turned and left without me. I got up to go after him, then decided I didn't care and sat back down to finish eating. When I got back to our house, he had the mission president on the line. The mission president gave me a mini lecture about never leaving my companion (he left me!) and then said he understood why I didn't want to leave my uneaten meal, and try to work it out with Elder Vargas.

                              It was all I could do not to beat the crap out of Vargas that night.
                              Stuff like that used to drive my MP nuts (Elder Vargas not you). Of course he had to say be obedient to the masses but in private he'd talk about how so many of the Elder Vargas' of the world have no common sense.
                              "It's true that everything happens for a reason. Just remember that sometimes that reason is that you did something really, really, stupid."

                              Comment

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