It's time to end the tradition of women taking their husbands' names

[SeattleUte]

The Internet, social networking, etc. demand that women keep the names they were born with, if that was not imperative before. I'm not a fan of women taking their husbands' names. I don't like the symbolism, anything about it. It's time for this atavistic tradition to go. It's all bad.

Nor am I particularly a fan of hyphenated names. Let the kids take whatever name by agreement. But I don't see any imperative to change the tradition in that regard.

[LiveCoug]

That was a grapevine post with big words.

[Green Monstah]

It's time to let women decide whether to take their husbands' names...oh wait. Yeah, that's already happened.

[SeattleUte]

It's time to let women decide whether to take their husbands' names...oh wait. Yeah, that's already happened.

I'm not saying we should illegalize anyone calling themselves anything. See the First Amendment. I want to end the practice through encouragement, discouragement and education. See smoking.

[Portland Ute]

The Internet, social networking, etc. demand that women keep the names they were born with, if that was not imperative before. I'm not a fan of women taking their husbands' names. I don't like the symbolism, anything about it. It's time for this atavistic tradition to go. It's all bad.

Nor am I particularly a fan of hyphenated names. Let the kids take whatever name by agreement. But I don't see any imperative to change the tradition in that regard.

This happens in many countries already.

You should know that.

In Spain, the wife doesn't take the husband's name. The kids take both the father and the mother's names, the father's being the one they are known by, as well as the family.

Mom: Maria Martinez Valero
Dad: Esteban Sanchez Romero
Kid: Carlos Sanchez Martinez.

The family: Los Sanchez

Works fine. Although, the mother seems to not really be part of the clan. SHe's the only one in the immediate family not named "Sanchez."

But whatever works for you, Seattle.

[Portland Ute]

I'm not saying we should illegalize anyone calling themselves anything. See the First Amendment. I want to end the practice through encouragement, discouragement and education. See smoking.

What do you propose?

It makes a lot of sense to have a common, ordered way of naming families and children. Or do you disagree?

[wuapinmon]

What do you propose?

It makes a lot of sense to have a common, ordered way of naming families and children. Or do you disagree?

This is an entirely cultural viewpoint. Order is cultural. Ask Tim how they file things by last name in Japan if they don't use a Roman alphabet.

Borges, my master, wrote of this fictional encyclopedia:

The Celestial Emporium of Benevolent Knowledge, in which it is written that animals are divided into:

1. those that belong to the Emperor,
2. embalmed ones,
3. those that are trained,
4. suckling pigs,
5. mermaids,
6. fabulous ones,
7. stray dogs,
8. those included in the present classification,
9. those that tremble as if they were mad,
10. innumerable ones,
11. those drawn with a very fine camelhair brush,
12. others,
13. those that have just broken a flower vase,
14. those that from a long way off look like flies.

The point of the exercise is to show how truly random any sense of "order" that we try to apply to anything really is. Michel Foucault said that this Borges story totally released his concept of order and made him view all information as vain attempts to codify chaos.

With all that said, I'm Southern, and I want my wife to have my last name because it's tradition. She can call herself whatever she likes, but I like it when she uses Mrs. wuapinmon. I also like Mrs. nee wuapinmon.

Of course, my white bread last name is not as cool as her maiden name.

[statman]

In Germany, the wife can take her husbands last name, can keep her own last name, or hyphenate it - her maiden name must be before the hyphen. What she can't do is drop her middle name and use her maiden name as her new middle name. Not allowed.

And to make matters worse, my wife was given two middle names (kind of a catholic thing, but none of them are Maria or anything similar) - so now her official passport name is really really long - First name, middle name #1, middle name #2, maiden name-married name. And doesn't match the name that she uses for anything here - first name, maiden name, married name. It's caused some headaches.

Hopefully she'll get a US passport soon and we can end this madness...

[Green Monstah]

In Germany, the wife can take her husbands last name, can keep her own last name, or hyphenate it - her maiden name must be before the hyphen. What she can't do is drop her middle name and use her maiden name as her new middle name. Not allowed.

And to make matters worse, my wife was given two middle names (kind of a catholic thing, but none of them are Maria or anything similar) - so now her official passport name is really really long - First name, middle name #1, middle name #2, maiden name-married name. And doesn't match the name that she uses for anything here - first name, maiden name, married name. It's caused some headaches.

Hopefully she'll get a US passport soon and we can end this madness...

My in laws didn't give their daughters a middle name so that they could use their maiden name as their middle name once married.

[statman]

My in laws didn't give their daughters a middle name so that they could use their maiden name as their middle name once married.

If we ever were to have a daughter, that's what we'd do as well...

[Uncle Ted]

Let's just forget names all together and assign everyone a number. I'll start: I'm #1.

[Lost Student]

In Germany, the wife can take her husbands last name, can keep her own last name, or hyphenate it - her maiden name must be before the hyphen. What she can't do is drop her middle name and use her maiden name as her new middle name. Not allowed.

And to make matters worse, my wife was given two middle names (kind of a catholic thing, but none of them are Maria or anything similar) - so now her official passport name is really really long - First name, middle name #1, middle name #2, maiden name-married name. And doesn't match the name that she uses for anything here - first name, maiden name, married name. It's caused some headaches.

Hopefully she'll get a US passport soon and we can end this madness...

My German Grandmother had about 7 or 8 names.

[pellegrino]

My German Grandmother had about 7 or 8 names.

that is a very catholic thing. In Italy they actually had to pass a law limiting the number of names that would be recognized on birth certificates. I think it was four (name, up to two middle names, surname). Some people I know were upset.

[pellegrino]

I'm not saying we should illegalize anyone calling themselves anything. See the First Amendment. I want to end the practice through encouragement, discouragement and education. See smoking.

um, that's already happening. Many young, educated women keep their names and don't take their husbands. Usually those who are religious conservatives carry on the tradition. I have friends who, when they married, combined their last names to make one surname. They legally changed their name to that and now their child has that surname too.

As for me and my house, I'll encourage my daughters to keep their own name.

[New Mexican Disaster]

Who gives a crap? People can choose for themselves.