Are you frequently (perhaps regularly is a better term) faced with the uncomfortable position of being petitioned for money by members/native companions/investigators from your mission?
At least once or twice a year I get contacted by Elder "Equis" or Hermana "Igriega" or some other acquaintance from my mission who asks for financial help. In fact, only once have I been contacted by someone from my mission who didn't ultimately end up asking for money. Unfortunately, they usually have a Hollywood-influenced understanding of how money works here in the U.S., and some of them have expressed disappointment, frustration, and even anger when I can't (or won't) provide them with what they are asking (sometimes in excess of $1000).
Just recently I was contacted by a young man who I baptized. He was 12 at the time, and while his mother ended up getting baptized a few months later, I always wondered if he wouldn't fall through the cracks and become one of the many inactives on the rolls of the church. Much to my surprise and pleasure, he has remained active, served a mission, and is planning to get married in the temple this coming December. He was contacting me to invite me to the wedding, and expressed what a great honor it would be to have me there. While I can't make the wedding (for both financial and timing reasons) I gave him my email, and we have stayed in contact over the past few weeks--me asking questions about members in the ward, him eagerly providing any info he could.
Then last week he drops the bomb: he and his fiancee would be honored if I would "patrocinar" their honeymoon. That's right--sponsor. As in, "could you provide us with $750 so we can take a honeymoon on the coast." He was convinced that $750 was a drop in the bucket for an American, and was quite insulted when I told him I couldn't give him that amount of money, but that I would talk with my wife and see how much we could give.
After discussing this with Mrs. Donut, we decided that we could give $100 to help them. (Note: $100 is the same amount I gave my younger siblings for their weddings, and 5 times as much as we usually give our friends who get married.) Upon relaying this to him, he was clearly put out, telling me that a single night on the hotel costs $80, and that he didn't know how he would come up with the rest of the money for the honeymoon. Rather than succumb to my instincts and send a harsh response (most of our communication has been via email since the initial contact), I waited a couple days until I had cooled down. I then replied that I wished I could send more, but that was all I could send, and to get me the information so I know where to send the money. That was 3 days ago, and I haven't heard back.
This is only one of dozens of similar instances. Have any other here been faced with the dilemma of constantly being approached for money by their mission friends? If so, how have you dealt with it?
At least once or twice a year I get contacted by Elder "Equis" or Hermana "Igriega" or some other acquaintance from my mission who asks for financial help. In fact, only once have I been contacted by someone from my mission who didn't ultimately end up asking for money. Unfortunately, they usually have a Hollywood-influenced understanding of how money works here in the U.S., and some of them have expressed disappointment, frustration, and even anger when I can't (or won't) provide them with what they are asking (sometimes in excess of $1000).
Just recently I was contacted by a young man who I baptized. He was 12 at the time, and while his mother ended up getting baptized a few months later, I always wondered if he wouldn't fall through the cracks and become one of the many inactives on the rolls of the church. Much to my surprise and pleasure, he has remained active, served a mission, and is planning to get married in the temple this coming December. He was contacting me to invite me to the wedding, and expressed what a great honor it would be to have me there. While I can't make the wedding (for both financial and timing reasons) I gave him my email, and we have stayed in contact over the past few weeks--me asking questions about members in the ward, him eagerly providing any info he could.
Then last week he drops the bomb: he and his fiancee would be honored if I would "patrocinar" their honeymoon. That's right--sponsor. As in, "could you provide us with $750 so we can take a honeymoon on the coast." He was convinced that $750 was a drop in the bucket for an American, and was quite insulted when I told him I couldn't give him that amount of money, but that I would talk with my wife and see how much we could give.
After discussing this with Mrs. Donut, we decided that we could give $100 to help them. (Note: $100 is the same amount I gave my younger siblings for their weddings, and 5 times as much as we usually give our friends who get married.) Upon relaying this to him, he was clearly put out, telling me that a single night on the hotel costs $80, and that he didn't know how he would come up with the rest of the money for the honeymoon. Rather than succumb to my instincts and send a harsh response (most of our communication has been via email since the initial contact), I waited a couple days until I had cooled down. I then replied that I wished I could send more, but that was all I could send, and to get me the information so I know where to send the money. That was 3 days ago, and I haven't heard back.
This is only one of dozens of similar instances. Have any other here been faced with the dilemma of constantly being approached for money by their mission friends? If so, how have you dealt with it?
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