Can I get a ruling on baby showers? I ask because Mrs. D just got invited to a baby shower for a woman who already has 4 kids. This will be her fifth. She is having the same gender baby as her two youngest children, the youngest of which is not quite 3 years old.
Maybe we are old fashioned in this regard, but Mrs. D and I both grew up with the understanding that, absent some unique circumstances, you get one baby shower. While we chose not to have one for our son, we're even ok with the idea that you get one shower for each gender, which seems to be the way the baby shower trend has moved over the last decade. But more and more we're seeing people having showers for their third, fourth, or, like in this situation, fifth child.
Help me understand this phenomenon of endless baby showers. Is this something others are seeing as well, or is it unique to my locale? Is this merely Mormons not understanding that simply because they have double or triple the national average in children doesn't mean they get double or triple the baby showers?
After thinking about it a bit, I think there are three circumstances which would justify a third baby shower (Against my personal feelings, I'm conceding that one shower for each gender is ok). At any rate, the list is as follows:
1) You are broke, and there is no way you will be able to provide the typical comforts for this baby absent a shower.
2) You have had difficulty conceiving, and there has been a significant enough break between your prior children and your forthcoming child, such that you no longer have any baby stuff.
3) This new baby is a "whoops" baby and there has been a significant enough break between your prior children and your forthcoming child, such that you no longer have any baby stuff.
I'm sure there are other reasons, but those are the three that jump out at me. And I almost feel like number 2 or 3 isn't sufficient reason unless accompanied by some financial distress. But perhaps I'm being ridiculous about this whole thing. At any rate, none of these applies in the instant situation. This is not a poor family. This is a young family with a husband who has a professional career and a wife who has chosen to be a SAHM. If they were having a "no gifts please" celebration, I wouldn't be typing this post. I am perfectly fine with anyone wanting to celebrate the birth of any child, regardless of number.
Personally, if we are close to someone, we are going to take them a baby gift when their child is born. (Well, I guess I should clarify that if Mrs. D is close to someone, she is going to take them a gift from us. My friends get stiffed unless Mrs. D is close to the wife).
What is your understanding of the unwritten rule?
/ramble
Maybe we are old fashioned in this regard, but Mrs. D and I both grew up with the understanding that, absent some unique circumstances, you get one baby shower. While we chose not to have one for our son, we're even ok with the idea that you get one shower for each gender, which seems to be the way the baby shower trend has moved over the last decade. But more and more we're seeing people having showers for their third, fourth, or, like in this situation, fifth child.
Help me understand this phenomenon of endless baby showers. Is this something others are seeing as well, or is it unique to my locale? Is this merely Mormons not understanding that simply because they have double or triple the national average in children doesn't mean they get double or triple the baby showers?
After thinking about it a bit, I think there are three circumstances which would justify a third baby shower (Against my personal feelings, I'm conceding that one shower for each gender is ok). At any rate, the list is as follows:
1) You are broke, and there is no way you will be able to provide the typical comforts for this baby absent a shower.
2) You have had difficulty conceiving, and there has been a significant enough break between your prior children and your forthcoming child, such that you no longer have any baby stuff.
3) This new baby is a "whoops" baby and there has been a significant enough break between your prior children and your forthcoming child, such that you no longer have any baby stuff.
I'm sure there are other reasons, but those are the three that jump out at me. And I almost feel like number 2 or 3 isn't sufficient reason unless accompanied by some financial distress. But perhaps I'm being ridiculous about this whole thing. At any rate, none of these applies in the instant situation. This is not a poor family. This is a young family with a husband who has a professional career and a wife who has chosen to be a SAHM. If they were having a "no gifts please" celebration, I wouldn't be typing this post. I am perfectly fine with anyone wanting to celebrate the birth of any child, regardless of number.
Personally, if we are close to someone, we are going to take them a baby gift when their child is born. (Well, I guess I should clarify that if Mrs. D is close to someone, she is going to take them a gift from us. My friends get stiffed unless Mrs. D is close to the wife).
What is your understanding of the unwritten rule?
/ramble
) sets of baby stuff.
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