The random advice thread

[oxcoug]

My first tip to the gentlemen:

Be careful when peeing while wearing a long scarf.

[Green Monstah]

Elimitate the use of the word "fine" from your vocabulary when dealing with your wife (other than to say, "Damn, baby, you FIIIINE!") Saying "Dinner was fine." Is like saying, "It was better than dog food."

[TripletDaddy]

Instant incendiary device when heatedly "debating" something with your wife: the classic "shame on you" hand motion. Extend index finger of one hand. With the opposite hands extended index finger, repeatedly rub the top of opposing extended index finger, akin to 2 sticks trying to light a fire.

I actually works, as fire will often result.

Ps if you need a really quick intense fire, add patronizing disapproving headshake to the process.

[pellegrino]

"Watch out where the huskies go, and don't you eat that yellow snow."

These words have made me into the man that I am today.

[hostile]

Don't mess around with gravity or inertia.

[NorthwestUteFan]

If you feel the warm summer breeze in your face, you are aiming the wrong direction to pee.

[wuapinmon]

Do not, under any circumstances, use over-the-counter super glue as sutures instead of going to the ER.

[old_gregg]

never get involved in a land war in asia

[BlueHair]

Never go against a Sicilian when death is on the line.

[SeattleUte]

The most useful and effective domestic tool is the toilet plunger.

[falafel]

The most useful and effective domestic tool is the toilet plunger.

I need some advice on post-plunging cleaning of the plunger. What's the best practice? Just throw it away maybe?

[Bo Diddley]

I need some advice on post-plunging cleaning of the plunger. What's the best practice? Just throw it away maybe?

I've always used copious amounts of hot water in the tub, but I like your solution better.

[Lost Student]

I need some advice on post-plunging cleaning of the plunger. What's the best practice? Just throw it away maybe?

Rinse in the clean water in the bowl after you unclog.

Once my wife didn't follow this crucial step after unclogging and the next time it got used (by me, since I'm on unclogging duty 99% of the time) a huge dried turd plopped out. At least we know that my daughter has healthy-sized stool.

My wife insists that we keep the plunger in the garage because it stinks (gee, I wonder why?).

[falafel]

Rinse in the clean water in the bowl after you unclog.

Once my wife didn't follow this crucial step after unclogging and the next time it got used (by me, since I'm on unclogging duty 99% of the time) a huge dried turd plopped out. At least we know that my daughter has healthy-sized stool.

My wife insists that we keep the plunger in the garage because it stinks (gee, I wonder why?).

Something similar happened last time someone other than me plunged the toilet. They rode it hard and put it away wet. Next time I opened the cabinet where it was stored, I was hit by a wave of the results of the decision.

[PaloAltoCougar]

A text fest among our adult children this morning centered on nosebleeds. Our oldest provided the following, and I'm curious if anyone has heard of this remedy before:

[Oldest grandson] gets nosebleeds all the time. Like, murder scene level. Here’s a fun remedy, if he lies on the ground and holds himself stiff, feet flexed, and I kick the bottoms of his feet 10 times, the nosebleed stops. A guy whose dad was an army doc told us this. It was so weird we had to try it. And it worked. We’ve been at group/party functions and he’ll come running over saying, “Kick my feet” and lay down. I’ll do it and then he’ll pop up and run off and people are like, “What just happened?” It’s a fun party trick.

i'd guess that just lying down for a bit is sufficient for the problem to self-resolve, but this is coming from someone knows someone whose dad's a doctor, so it's probably legit. Still, anyone else hear of this?