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Thread: Being reactivated

  1. #61
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    Sooner, I have no idea how much of you is full of shit and how much of you is bravado.

    I have mastered flying under the radar, and never experience the odd behavior you describe. I show up when I want, where I want, attend as little or as much I wish, with little inconvenient behavior by members.

    I pay what I wish in donations and never have anybody question my whereabouts nor are they particularly pleased to see me. In fact, my records remain with my divorced wife's ward and nobody knows what my home ward is.

    Flying under the radar is an art form. It can be perfected.

  2. #62
    Faith crisis consultant SeattleUte's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Topper View Post
    Sooner, I have no idea how much of you is full of shit and how much of you is bravado.

    I have mastered flying under the radar, and never experience the odd behavior you describe. I show up when I want, where I want, attend as little or as much I wish, with little inconvenient behavior by members.

    I pay what I wish in donations and never have anybody question my whereabouts nor are they particularly pleased to see me. In fact, my records remain with my divorced wife's ward and nobody knows what my home ward is.

    Flying under the radar is an art form. It can be perfected.
    Why not just vanish into the blue yonder?
    When a true genius appears, you can know him by this sign: that all the dunces are in a confederacy against him.

    --Jonathan Swift

  3. #63
    Senior Member byu71's Avatar
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    I have had that huge smile and large hand moving rapidly my way. Since I stopped going to Priesthood and when I go to Sacrament it is on the back row in at the last minute and out as soon as I say amen, many old acqauintances think I am totally inactive.

    Most I think are sincere in their happiness in seeing me attend. It does at times feel awkward. I used to retort with an explanation that I was there a lot more than they knew, but that got old so now I just thank them for caring and tell their wives, "no, I am not interested in attending empty nesters".

  4. #64

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    Quote Originally Posted by Topper View Post

    I show up when I want, where I want, attend as little or as much I wish.
    I can't tell if you're talking about church or Burger King.

  5. #65
    Invisible Swordsman DrumNFeather's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SeattleUte View Post
    Who else just shows up some evening absent appointment expecting to be received and given an audience?
    Pest control salesmen...many of whom are LDS.
    "They're good. They've always been good" - David Shaw.

    Well, because he thought it was good sport. Because some men aren't looking for anything logical, like money. They can't be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn.

  6. #66
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    Quote Originally Posted by SeattleUte View Post
    Why not just vanish into the blue yonder?
    The community has merit and hope springs eternal.

  7. #67
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    Quote Originally Posted by Babs View Post
    I can't tell if you're talking about church or Burger King.
    You can have it YOUR way.

  8. #68
    One man.....one pie Moliere's Avatar
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    It's been my experience that if you are upfront and honest with your bishop about what contact you want from the ward, you are likely to get exactly what you ask for. Sounds like Sooner is again in a ward that is an anomaly.
    "Discipleship is not a spectator sport. We cannot expect to experience the blessing of faith by standing inactive on the sidelines any more than we can experience the benefits of health by sitting on a sofa watching sporting events on television and giving advice to the athletes. And yet for some, “spectator discipleship” is a preferred if not primary way of worshipping." -Pres. Uchtdorf

  9. #69
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    Quote Originally Posted by Moliere View Post
    It's been my experience that if you are upfront and honest with your bishop about what contact you want from the ward, you are likely to get exactly what you ask for. Sounds like Sooner is again in a ward that is an anomaly.
    Something in Sooner's persona attracts weirdness, or is subject to hyperbole.

  10. #70
    One man.....one pie Moliere's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Topper View Post
    Something in Sooner's persona attracts weirdness, or is subject to hyperbole.
    Using occams razor I'd just conclude that Sooner is weird, but I still love the guy.
    "Discipleship is not a spectator sport. We cannot expect to experience the blessing of faith by standing inactive on the sidelines any more than we can experience the benefits of health by sitting on a sofa watching sporting events on television and giving advice to the athletes. And yet for some, “spectator discipleship” is a preferred if not primary way of worshipping." -Pres. Uchtdorf

  11. #71

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    Quote Originally Posted by Moliere View Post
    It's been my experience that if you are upfront and honest with your bishop about what contact you want from the ward, you are likely to get exactly what you ask for. Sounds like Sooner is again in a ward that is an anomaly.
    I don't think so at all. I think both your experience and his are typical.

  12. #72
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    Quote Originally Posted by UtahDan View Post
    I don't think so at all. I think both your experience and his are typical.
    Do you think so today? It seems Sooner simply retells Mormon folklore because it lends itself so well to satire, and because it has a kernel of truth it lends itself to being believed.

    Sooner is really a postmodernist Mormon satirist.

  13. #73
    One man.....one pie Moliere's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by UtahDan View Post
    I don't think so at all. I think both your experience and his are typical.
    I don't disagree, but in his experience he has likely never asked for the visits to be curtailed or completely stopped. He just bitches and moans about them all while contemplating sending an email to the bishop.

    I'm just saying that if he wants the behavior to stop he might want to be honest with the bishop about the level of contact he wants with the church. I think the bishop and RSP would be happy to know the level of contact he wants, and in fact that is probably exactly what they are trying to figure out right now.
    "Discipleship is not a spectator sport. We cannot expect to experience the blessing of faith by standing inactive on the sidelines any more than we can experience the benefits of health by sitting on a sofa watching sporting events on television and giving advice to the athletes. And yet for some, “spectator discipleship” is a preferred if not primary way of worshipping." -Pres. Uchtdorf

  14. #74
    Senior Member Clark Addison's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SoonerCoug View Post
    I also frequently received emails from people asking where we would be going for Christmas and why we weren't making it to church on holidays (none of which were days off for me). The final straw for my wife was being called in by the Bishop (without me while I was working 30-hour shifts as a resident) and the bishop suggesting that we should have been paying 25,000 dollars (no joke) tithing instead of 2500. It was bad enough to be fielding questions from him about when we would be having children (none of his beeswax).
    That sucks Sooner. I agree with you that questioning what others pay in tithing is very declasse.

  15. #75

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    Quote Originally Posted by Clark Addison View Post
    I agree with you that questioning what others pay in tithing is very declasse.
    I think 99% of bishops in the church would also agree. Of course, sooner has had the pleasure of attending the wards of the handful of bishops who might question it.

  16. #76
    Heartless Bastard Indy Coug's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by smokymountainrain View Post
    I think 99% of bishops in the church would also agree. Of course, sooner has had the pleasure of attending the wards of the handful of bishops who might question it.
    If Sooner was a little older, I'd swear he was this guy:

    http://www.environmentalgraffiti.com...ng-seven-times
    Everything in life is an approximation.

    http://twitter.com/CougarStats

  17. #77

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    Quote Originally Posted by Topper View Post

    Flying under the radar is an art form. It can be perfected.
    Agree. Part of the problem exmo's or borderlanders (not all) have is that they see it as all or nothing. You can make Mormonism what you want it to be, and make it work for you.

  18. #78
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    Quote Originally Posted by jay santos View Post
    Agree. Part of the problem exmo's or borderlanders (not all) have is that they see it as all or nothing. You can make Mormonism what you want it to be, and make it work for you.
    Mormons could take lessons from Catholics and Jews.

  19. #79

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    Quote Originally Posted by jay santos View Post
    Agree. Part of the problem exmo's or borderlanders (not all) have is that they see it as all or nothing. You can make Mormonism what you want it to be, and make it work for you.
    yeah, custom made religion. love it!

  20. #80

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    Quote Originally Posted by MindfulCoug View Post
    yeah, custom made religion. love it!
    I love your avatar.

  21. #81

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    Quote Originally Posted by snowcat View Post
    I love your avatar.
    Thanks. I am honored to have won avatar of the year award back on CG.
    Last edited by MindfulCoug; 08-23-2012 at 12:33 PM.

  22. #82

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    Quote Originally Posted by Topper View Post
    Do you think so today? It seems Sooner simply retells Mormon folklore because it lends itself so well to satire, and because it has a kernel of truth it lends itself to being believed.

    Sooner is really a postmodernist Mormon satirist.
    No I hear enough similar stuff elsewhere to at least know its not a complete aberration.

  23. #83

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    Quote Originally Posted by Moliere View Post
    I don't disagree, but in his experience he has likely never asked for the visits to be curtailed or completely stopped. He just bitches and moans about them all while contemplating sending an email to the bishop.

    I'm just saying that if he wants the behavior to stop he might want to be honest with the bishop about the level of contact he wants with the church. I think the bishop and RSP would be happy to know the level of contact he wants, and in fact that is probably exactly what they are trying to figure out right now.
    I agree. Being authentic with others us usually better.

  24. #84

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    Quote Originally Posted by jay santos View Post
    Agree. Part of the problem exmo's or borderlanders (not all) have is that they see it as all or nothing. You can make Mormonism what you want it to be, and make it work for you.
    I don't think you are doing people justice. I think everyone weighs the cost and benefits and simply decides whether it benefits them overall. I have never questioned the ability of anyone to construct incredibly elaborate ways to make it work for themselves if its rewards them to do so. But I have never met anyone who declined that effort because they believed it was all or nothing. They declined because to them it isn't worth it. Everyone is different, but I definitely don't see finding some way to make it work as being more or less noble or intelligent than any other choice.

  25. #85

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    Quote Originally Posted by UtahDan View Post
    I agree. Being authentic with others us usually better.
    In my experience, at least some time in most bishopric and ward council meetings is devoted to identifying and/or discussing less-active/inactive members for fellowshipping purposes. Someone who pays a full tithing, maintains contact with church members, and occasionally attends church would, in my experience, usually rise toward the top few names on such a list.

    Those identified people will receive visits, calls, emails, etc. from bishopric members, other ward leaders, home and visiting teachers, and potentially from other people the ward leaders identify as having a good relationship with them. The goal is to get the people back into full church activity. I'm sure opinions vary regarding that goal.

    I'd be interested to hear what others have experienced.

    With that in mind, I'd be more surprised, Sooner, if you weren't receiving those communications from your ward members. However, any reasonable person should stop if you so request.
    "What are you prepared to do?" - Jimmy Malone

    "What choice?" - Abe Petrovsky

  26. #86

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    Quote Originally Posted by Joe Public View Post
    In my experience, at least some time in most bishopric and ward council meetings is devoted to identifying and/or discussing less-active/inactive members for fellowshipping purposes. Someone who pays a full tithing, maintains contact with church members, and occasionally attends church would, in my experience, usually rise toward the top few names on such a list.

    Those identified people will receive visits, calls, emails, etc. from bishopric members, other ward leaders, home and visiting teachers, and potentially from other people the ward leaders identify as having a good relationship with them. The goal is to get the people back into full church activity. I'm sure opinions vary regarding that goal.

    I'd be interested to hear what others have experienced.

    With that in mind, I'd be more surprised, Sooner, if you weren't receiving those communications from your ward members. However, any reasonable person should stop if you so request.
    It's called love bombing. And I agree, don't make these poor people spin their wheels if you're not interested. But frequently people's lives are more complicated than just saying yes or no to that kind of thing.

  27. #87

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    Quote Originally Posted by jay santos View Post
    Agree. Part of the problem exmo's or borderlanders (not all) have is that they see it as all or nothing. You can make Mormonism what you want it to be, and make it work for you.
    To be fair, I don't see that as unique to the exmo crowd. I know woot (where is that guy?; I enjoyed his viewpoints) and others have talked about binary thinking; that isn't unique to any certain group. Christianity says to be lukewarm is worse than being cold. LDS temple-goers promise to give all their time, talent and efforts to the building of the kingdom (not just whatever they see fit). As a more generalized illustration of the concept, a member of the PQ70 said last October:

    That is the genius of the Book of Mormon—there is no middle ground. It is either the word of God as professed, or it is a total fraud. This book does not merely claim to be a moral treatise or theological commentary or collection of insightful writings. It claims to be the word of God—every sentence, every verse, every page. Joseph Smith declared that an angel of God directed him to gold plates, which contained the writings of prophets in ancient America, and that he translated those plates by divine powers. If that story is true, then the Book of Mormon is holy scripture, just as it professes to be; if not, it is a sophisticated but, nonetheless, diabolical hoax.
    I think the all-or-nothing mindset can be found on both ends of the spectrum.
    "What are you prepared to do?" - Jimmy Malone

    "What choice?" - Abe Petrovsky

  28. #88

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    Quote Originally Posted by UtahDan View Post
    I don't think you are doing people justice. I think everyone weighs the cost and benefits and simply decides whether it benefits them overall. I have never questioned the ability of anyone to construct incredibly elaborate ways to make it work for themselves if its rewards them to do so. But I have never met anyone who declined that effort because they believed it was all or nothing. They declined because to them it isn't worth it. Everyone is different, but I definitely don't see finding some way to make it work as being more or less noble or intelligent than any other choice.
    I think the available options are not widely understood.

  29. #89
    It is NOT a monkey! creekster's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by UtahDan View Post
    I have never questioned the ability of anyone to construct incredibly elaborate ways to make it work for themselves if its rewards them to do so.
    ANd how could we asked for a more unbiased observer than this?
    PLesa excuse the tpyos.

  30. #90

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    Quote Originally Posted by jay santos View Post
    I think the available options are not widely understood.
    That is a fair point. But in my experience most people desperately explore all of those other possibilities before they ever make a decision to get out.

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