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Thread: THE OFFICIAL CRAIG JAMES KILLED FIVE HOOKERS AT SMU THREAD

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    Default THE OFFICIAL CRAIG JAMES KILLED FIVE HOOKERS AT SMU THREAD

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    RIP CUF DU Ute's Avatar
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    I'd never heard that Craig James killed 5 hookers while he was at SMU.
    "In conclusion, let me give a shout-out to dirty sex. What a great thing it is" - Northwestcoug
    "And you people wonder why you've had extermination orders issued against you." - landpoke
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    I hope Craig James dies of fiery chlamydia. Somebody needs to put a bigger lock on Adam's shed next time.
    Te Occidere Possunt Sed Te Edere Non Possunt Nefas Est.

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    Never once baby snatched landpoke's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DU Ute View Post
    I'd never heard that Craig James killed 5 hookers while he was at SMU.
    DU it would be completely irresponsible to repeat the rumor that Craig James killed 5 hookers while at SMU. Even if it is true.

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    Quote Originally Posted by landpoke View Post
    DU it would be completely irresponsible to repeat the rumor that Craig James killed 5 hookers while at SMU. Even if it is true.
    I heard they were tranny hookers. Those are the best kind.
    "More crazy people to Provo go than to any other town in the state."
    -- Iron County Record. 23 August, 1912. (http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lc...23/ed-1/seq-4/)

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    Never once baby snatched landpoke's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Solon View Post
    I heard they were tranny hookers. Those are the best kind.
    Once again, it is irresponsible to suggest that Craig James killed, dismembered and wore the skin of 5 tranny hookers while at SMU.

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    lollygagger hostile's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by landpoke View Post
    Once again, it is irresponsible to suggest that Craig James killed, dismembered and wore the skin of 5 tranny hookers while at SMU.
    You forgot to mention that this occurred after he made a slip 'n slide with their blood.
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    Quote Originally Posted by hostile View Post
    You forgot to mention that this occurred after he made a slip 'n slide with their blood.
    Allegedly.

    Rumor also has it Craig James sold five whore bone wind chimes around the time of their deaths at a garage sale.
    Last edited by Coach McGuirk; 11-11-2011 at 07:54 AM.

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    RIP CUF DU Ute's Avatar
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    There wouldn't be all these rumors that CRAIG JAMES BRUTALLY MURDERED 5 HOOKERS AND USES THEIR DISMEMBERED CORPSES AS HALLOWEEN DECORATIONS if there wasn't at least some truth to it. Right?
    "In conclusion, let me give a shout-out to dirty sex. What a great thing it is" - Northwestcoug
    "And you people wonder why you've had extermination orders issued against you." - landpoke
    "Can't . . . let . . . foolish statements . . . by . . . BYU fans . . . go . . . unanswered . . . ." - LA Ute

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    It is NOT a monkey! creekster's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Solon View Post
    I heard they were tranny hookers. Those are the best kind.
    How do you and Craig James know this?
    PLesa excuse the tpyos.

  11. #11

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    Quote Originally Posted by creekster View Post
    How do you and Craig James know this?
    Craig James had me call Tim Tebow for some tranny-hooker recommendations. I had to call Tim anyways to check on a cocaine shipment.
    "More crazy people to Provo go than to any other town in the state."
    -- Iron County Record. 23 August, 1912. (http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lc...23/ed-1/seq-4/)

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    Never once baby snatched landpoke's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DU Ute View Post
    There wouldn't be all these rumors that CRAIG JAMES BRUTALLY MURDERED 5 HOOKERS AND USES THEIR DISMEMBERED CORPSES AS HALLOWEEN DECORATIONS if there wasn't at least some truth to it. Right?
    I can neither confirm nor deny that Craig James killed five hookers (allegedly trannys), dismembered them, used their blood for a slip 'n slide and then sold their various body parts as trinkets while dressed in their skin. However I will mention that when I was a kid there was a rumor that there were spider eggs in Bubble Yum brand bubble gum. Snopes.com has since convincingly debunked this story, yet remains silent on the rumor that that CRAIG JAMES KILLED FIVE HOOKERS WHILE AT SMU. You can draw your own conclusions from that.
    Last edited by landpoke; 11-11-2011 at 08:10 AM.
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    Suomalainen New Mexican Disaster's Avatar
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    There is no truth to the rumor that Craig James took out the tranny hookers because he hated the competition and wanted to be the best tranny hooker in Dallas. And that he killed them while he chewed spider egg bubble gum.

  14. #14

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    You people need to stop with all this wild speculation about blood slip-n-slide's, etc. Craig James is a professional tranny hooker killer. He kills them and dissolves them in a vat of acid like a true professional.
    As I lead this army, make room for mistakes and depression
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    Never once baby snatched landpoke's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mpfunk View Post
    You people need to stop with all this wild speculation about blood slip-n-slide's, etc. Craig James is a professional tranny hooker killer. He kills them and dissolves them in a vat of acid like a true professional.
    We'll have to agree to disagree regarding the methods CRAIG JAMES used to dispose of the FIVE HOOKERS he allegedly KILLED AT SMU. However, and this is based purely on my knowledge of CRAIG JAMES as a media personality, I would be shocked if there wasn't some sort of ritualistic canabalism involved in the deaths of the FIVE HOOKERS CRAIG JAMES is rumored to have KILLED WHILE AT SMU.
    Last edited by landpoke; 11-11-2011 at 10:09 AM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by DU Ute View Post
    I'd never heard that Craig James killed 5 hookers while he was at SMU.
    What I've never heard is that the hookers killed themselves after the horror of Craig James.
    I think, perhaps, the only person who hates BYU fans more than ute fans hate BYU fans, is Bronco Mendenhall.
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    Senior Member SteelBlue's Avatar
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    You guys have rocketed to the number 9 hit for a google search of: craig james killed 5 hookers.

    https://www.google.com/#sclient=psy-...6&pf=p&pdl=500

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    Quote Originally Posted by SteelBlue View Post
    You guys have rocketed to the number 9 hit for a google search of: craig james killed 5 hookers.

    https://www.google.com/#sclient=psy-...6&pf=p&pdl=500
    I'm guessing it's right behind links like the NY Times and Yahoo Sports. Ours is just rank speculation, more people want the facts about CRAIG JAMES KILLING 5 HOOKERS.
    "In conclusion, let me give a shout-out to dirty sex. What a great thing it is" - Northwestcoug
    "And you people wonder why you've had extermination orders issued against you." - landpoke
    "Can't . . . let . . . foolish statements . . . by . . . BYU fans . . . go . . . unanswered . . . ." - LA Ute

  19. #19

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    Craig James killed only the 5 hookers that begged for mercy. All of the other hookers only had their teeth and tongues removed for safety and silence.

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    This thread is nothing but "Babs bait". If anything can bring her out of retirement, it would be to come to the rescue of Craig James.
    "Newton's First Law of Motion: ...things at rest tend to stay at rest. Things in motion, tend to stay in motion...."

    Hmm... Good motivation for me to remain active I guess.

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    Ragnar Lodbrok Descendant SoCalCoug's Avatar
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    I find it very curious that ESPN hasn't commented on the rumors that CRAIG JAMES KILLED FIVE HOOKERS. What are they hiding?
    If we disagree on something, it's because you're wrong.

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    Never once baby snatched landpoke's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Borg View Post
    This thread is nothing but "Babs bait". If anything can bring her out of retirement, it would be to come to the rescue of Craig James.
    Well somebody needs to come to his defense what with all these baseless rumors about CRAIG JAMES KILLING FIVE HOOKERS AT SMU.
    There's no such thing as luck, only drunken invincibility. Make it happen.

    Tila Tequila and Juggalos, America’s saddest punchline since the South.

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    Quote Originally Posted by DU Ute View Post
    I'm guessing it's right behind links like the NY Times and Yahoo Sports. Ours is just rank speculation, more people want the facts about CRAIG JAMES KILLING 5 HOOKERS.
    It's the question everybody wants to know: what about Craig James Killed 5 Hookers? Texas wants to know if Craig James Killed 5 Hookers, or if Craig James Will Kill 5 More Hookers.
    Awesomeness now has a name. Let me introduce myself.

  24. #24

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    "Craig James killed 5 hookers at SMU" rumor FAQ:

    Q. According to the rumor, who killed 5 hookers at SMU?
    A. Craig James.

    Q. According to the rumor, who did Craig James kill at SMU?
    A. 5 hookers.

    Q. According to the rumor, how many hookers did Craig James kill at SMU?
    A. 5.

    Q. Where was Craig James when he (allegedly) killed those 5 hookers?
    A. SMU

    Q. What did Craig James do to 5 hookers while he was at SMU?
    A. He is rumored to have killed them dead.

  25. #25

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    Not bad. Already on the first page, but still 9th from the top.

    [ame]http://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1RNAN_enUS453US454&aq=1&oq=craig+jame s+&gcx=c&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8&q=craig+james+killed+5+hookers[/ame]

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  26. #26

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    So I was just just browsing this thread...is this real? Did Craig James Kill 5 Hookers at SMU?

  27. #27

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    Quote Originally Posted by smokymountainrain View Post
    So I was just just browsing this thread...is this real? Did Craig James Kill 5 Hookers at SMU?
    FIVE HOOKERS WERE KILLED BY CRAIG JAMES when he was at SMU. Craig James also killed the 5 hookers in Lubbock when he was messing with The Pirate at his son's behest. His hooker killing spree started at SMU and continues throughout his mortal sojourn even today.

  28. #28

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    the title of this thread needs to be changed to "The Official Craig James Killed 5 Hookers thread". Craig James KILLED 5 hookers, he didn't AND them.

  29. #29
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    Has Craig James ever denied that CRAIG JAMES KILLED 5 HOOKERS AT SMU?

    The silence is telling. I'm starting to think there's some truth to these widespread rumors that CRAIG JAMES KILLED 5 HOOKERS AT SMU.
    I think, perhaps, the only person who hates BYU fans more than ute fans hate BYU fans, is Bronco Mendenhall.
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  30. #30

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    Quote Originally Posted by Flystripper View Post
    the title of this thread needs to be changed to "The Official Craig James Killed 5 Hookers thread". Craig James KILLED 5 hookers, he didn't AND them.
    I am really sorry that I did not properly title this thread the Official Craig James Killed 5 Hookers thread. It is important that the official thread title doesn't minimize that CRAIG JAMES KILLED 5 HOOKERS. I apologize for my horrible act. Although, it was not nearly as horrible of an act as when CRAIG JAMES KILLED 5 HOOKERS and disposed of their bodies by dissolving them in a vat of acid.
    As I lead this army, make room for mistakes and depression
    --Kendrick Lamar

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