Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 30 of 37

Thread: Missionary "Splits/Exchanges"

  1. #1
    Invisible Swordsman DrumNFeather's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Caught Beneath the Landslide
    Posts
    7,695

    Default Missionary "Splits/Exchanges"

    How involved is your ward in Missionary splits/exchanges?

    Do you have an assigned night that you go out with the missionaries or is it strictly optional? (I know it's all optional)

    I'm looking for some strategies to help my missionaries (I'm the WML) get the support they need without annoying the membership. (Our ward in the last 6-8 months) has finally started showing support after a missionary came through that really offended some of the members.

    Thanks
    "They're good. They've always been good" - David Shaw.

    Well, because he thought it was good sport. Because some men aren't looking for anything logical, like money. They can't be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn.

  2. #2
    Stepping Razor wuapinmon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Hartsville, South Carolina
    Posts
    24,490

    Default

    I quit going on splits when I lived in New Orleans, I don't see the point. I'll invite them to teach someone in my home, but I'm not going out with missionaries so I can drive them all over three counties to find no one home. That they can't split and have two 'companionships' going on the same night means I'm just driving them around.

    Once, in New Orleans, the elders came over on P-day and asked if they could print directions somewhere. They brought their DL with them. He was such an ass that I told him to leave my home and I told the elders, in front of the dude, that they shouldn't listen to a word he said because he was full of hate and pride and that he needed to just go home and let someone who cared take his place.

    I had this ideal of what a missionary was supposed to be when I left on my mission. I got out in the field and realized it was just like high school, only everyone said "fetch" instead of "fuck."
    "LDS people need to lighten up and not take religion so seriously." --CardiacCoug
    "[...]
    liberals tend to take the moral teachings of the New Testament literally and the stories figuratively while conservatives do the opposite." -- Harry Tic

  3. #3
    Where's Wallace? Surfah's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    V to the izz-A.
    Posts
    31,853

    Default

    Since I am in Primary I don't know how my ward does exchanges. My experiences with exchanges have been mostly like Waupinmon describes. We meet at the apartment at 7pm and then split up and end up driving around to 5 different homes who don't answer and I drop them back off at 9pm. Or there have been times where we just go do my home teaching (their suggestion) because they don't have any appointments. And still other times were they want me to knock doors with them. Not going to happen.

    I think for a positive experience the onus has to be on the missionaries. Make sure they have teaching appointments. Even then this can be iffy. I remember as a missionary being wary of taking members on actual teaching appointments because there is always awkwardness into how the member is supposed to participate. And worse, they may say something that will impede any sort of progress. I'd say isit new converts. Visit less actives. Those types of activities that build fellowship opportunities which are more suitable to member missionary efforts.

    Splits for the sake of splits is not productive. Splits to save miles on their car so you end up driving them around for 2 hours is not productive.
    "Nobody listens to Turtle."
    -Turtle

  4. #4
    Boom Bitches!!! BlueHair's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Utah
    Posts
    2,898

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by wuapinmon View Post
    I quit going on splits when I lived in New Orleans, I don't see the point. I'll invite them to teach someone in my home, but I'm not going out with missionaries so I can drive them all over three counties to find no one home. That they can't split and have two 'companionships' going on the same night means I'm just driving them around.

    Once, in New Orleans, the elders came over on P-day and asked if they could print directions somewhere. They brought their DL with them. He was such an ass that I told him to leave my home and I told the elders, in front of the dude, that they shouldn't listen to a word he said because he was full of hate and pride and that he needed to just go home and let someone who cared take his place.

    I had this ideal of what a missionary was supposed to be when I left on my mission. I got out in the field and realized it was just like high school, only everyone said "fetch" instead of "fuck."
    That's fetched up.

  5. #5
    Invisible Swordsman DrumNFeather's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Caught Beneath the Landslide
    Posts
    7,695

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Surfah View Post
    Since I am in Primary I don't know how my ward does exchanges. My experiences with exchanges have been mostly like Waupinmon describes. We meet at the apartment at 7pm and then split up and end up driving around to 5 different homes who don't answer and I drop them back off at 9pm. Or there have been times where we just go do my home teaching (their suggestion) because they don't have any appointments. And still other times were they want me to knock doors with them. Not going to happen.

    I think for a positive experience the onus has to be on the missionaries. Make sure they have teaching appointments. Even then this can be iffy. I remember as a missionary being wary of taking members on actual teaching appointments because there is always awkwardness into how the member is supposed to participate. And worse, they may say something that will impede any sort of progress. I'd say isit new converts. Visit less actives. Those types of activities that build fellowship opportunities which are more suitable to member missionary efforts.

    Splits for the sake of splits is not productive. Splits to save miles on their car so you end up driving them around for 2 hours is not productive.
    I had a long talk with our EQ President last night to get some tips from him about how to deal with this situation. I told him that one of our elders was a real "go getter" and is asking for an exchange for every appointment. He told me that I let him be a go getter and go get his own exchange if he wants them.

    I'm just not going to call people and ask them to go out on a Friday night or Saturday afternoon. Especially when I get the request from the elders at about 5:00 PM on Friday night.

    I think that WML is one of those callings that is an "endure to the end" type calling where you just have to grin and bear it as you attempt to do your calling without putting people off.
    "They're good. They've always been good" - David Shaw.

    Well, because he thought it was good sport. Because some men aren't looking for anything logical, like money. They can't be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn.

  6. #6

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by DrumNFeather View Post
    I had a long talk with our EQ President last night to get some tips from him about how to deal with this situation. I told him that one of our elders was a real "go getter" and is asking for an exchange for every appointment. He told me that I let him be a go getter and go get his own exchange if he wants them.

    I'm just not going to call people and ask them to go out on a Friday night or Saturday afternoon. Especially when I get the request from the elders at about 5:00 PM on Friday night.

    I think that WML is one of those callings that is an "endure to the end" type calling where you just have to grin and bear it as you attempt to do your calling without putting people off.
    I admit that WML was a calling that I failed miserably. I tried at first, but I got so pissed off after a while that I quit trying altogether. I organized firesides, had the mission president even make the drive to speak at them, and pretty much nobody came; even the members of the PEC group blew it off. After a while, I pretty much threw my hands in the air.

    Nobody ever showed up for splits, and getting people to come to a correlation meeting was like asking them to offer their bedroom to a group of homeless midgets for the weekend. Finally, I just told the elders to call me anytime they need a ride or wanted a member to fellowship during a discussion and I'd help them out.

    Ironically, we had some good success in our ward, but we had a string of outstanding missionaries. Even more ironic, the bishopric thought I was a great ward mission leader because I always had something to report at PEC. My brother gave me that advice: always have something to report, and they'll think you're doing great.

    Success in the calling depends on a few things:

    1) Good missionaries that members can trust. Nobody is going to refer their friends to be taught by idiots.

    2) Splits only when the elders have good teaching appointments. Nobody wants to waste their time.

    3) Getting the leaders of the ward on splits during good spiritual discussions. This will get them excited, and their leadership will spread enthusiasm through the ward. This was where I failed.

    4) Education of the role of a member missionary. The gospel isn't Amway. Most members still think that they are being asked to become friends with some strange family just to share the gospel in some awkward cottage meeting at their home. Or, they think that they need to suddenly ask their friends over for dinner and then spring family home evening or the missionary discussions on them. That's not how it works. Being a member missionary is really pretty easy: have a sincere love for your friends and be willing to discuss your beliefs with them when they inquire. That's it. People know when you're sincere.
    Last edited by cowboy; 04-25-2009 at 10:12 AM. Reason: your/you're fail

  7. #7
    Time to camp HuskyFreeNorthwest's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    The Eug
    Posts
    20,585

    Default

    I was the WML for almost 4 years. Our splits were as follows, me going out with both of them. The EQ had been going on a Tuesday night split, but people stopped showing up and the EQP about 6 months before I became WML decided it wasn't worth the headache.

    After a few months in the calling I started to learn of a handful of people that would go if you called them and the missionaries had somewhere they were going specifically. I found that most guys saw no reason to go if you were just driving around from house to house to filling time until 9 o'clock, or cold calling people at 8:45 on a weeknight. I felt the same way, so I had a hard time pushing people. Good luck.
    Get confident, stupid
    -landpoke

  8. #8

    Default

    I love being in wards that have good missionary programs. Those wards always seem to be the closest to "Zion" that I have ever been in. It takes a special mix to make it happen, though. You need a bishopric that really understands the work and how to support it. You need a WML that has the energy to really make the program run. You need members that have a vision for the work and how they can help. Cowboy is correct in how true member missionary work functions. It can be simple and easy but people have to not feel like it's forced on them. When you have all of this in place you really only need mediocre missionaries in there to make stuff really move. Bad missionaries will turn everyone off but anything above that will suffice. A really good missionary or two who can direct a good discussion (which is what it is, directing) with a less experienced but enthusiastic member can really work magic. Being in situations like that, for me, have always been trancendent. Good luck with your calling.

  9. #9
    Where's Wallace? Surfah's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    V to the izz-A.
    Posts
    31,853

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by DrumNFeather View Post
    I had a long talk with our EQ President last night to get some tips from him about how to deal with this situation. I told him that one of our elders was a real "go getter" and is asking for an exchange for every appointment. He told me that I let him be a go getter and go get his own exchange if he wants them.

    I'm just not going to call people and ask them to go out on a Friday night or Saturday afternoon. Especially when I get the request from the elders at about 5:00 PM on Friday night.

    I think that WML is one of those callings that is an "endure to the end" type calling where you just have to grin and bear it as you attempt to do your calling without putting people off.
    I am thankful I have never been called to a WML. I hated when I was called to be a stake missionary as soon as I got home from my mission. I couldn't wait for that summer to be over so I could get back to Utah.

    Splits on weekends is bad. The missionaries in our ward tend to call at the 11th hour also for an exchange. In fact two weekends ago they called my home at 11 am to go on an a split at 1pm on a Saturday. I didn't go.

    Like Cowboy and IJ Reilly said it takes a special set of Elders to get the work going in the ward. Maybe as a WML you can focus your efforts there instead of on the members. I remember being in a ward and attending PEC and Welfare meetings where the missionaries would always have some sort of project for the ward. Everything they had to report was about some awesome new investigator who needed a ride to work, daycare, Church welfare, help moving, etc. Needless to say, soliciting the help of the ward in that way didn't create the best member missionary efforts.
    "Nobody listens to Turtle."
    -Turtle

  10. #10
    Senior Member SteelBlue's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    FarNorCal
    Posts
    5,757

    Default

    I've gone out and taught with the missionaries, but I draw the line at tracting. Never again. Remember the old Missionary Guide and the bad example of the ward member who would say "sorry Elders, but I did my two years"? That's me now.

  11. #11
    Stepping Razor wuapinmon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Hartsville, South Carolina
    Posts
    24,490

    Default

    I don't feel comfortable giving referrals to the elders because I don't know them. I'm not going to trust my friends and neighbors to two boys who walk around like the cat's meow. I save my referrals for the humble few who come through. I wouldn't have given myself a referral during the first half of my mission.
    "LDS people need to lighten up and not take religion so seriously." --CardiacCoug
    "[...]
    liberals tend to take the moral teachings of the New Testament literally and the stories figuratively while conservatives do the opposite." -- Harry Tic

  12. #12

    Default

    I noticed on caller id once the missionareis number they called me because wml wasn't home and I was next on list alphabetically. Did find someone to go though. I don't mind going when they have appointments and need male there. Just happened to be when BYU had a game though. I missed byu games for that reason.

    When I was in singles ward that covered several stakes missionary showed up to activity and asked if I had any referals for them or would find any. Problem he couldn't teach anyone that lived in my area as that was diffrent missionaries area. I have an uncle not at all active don't want to be. When missionares say I need to talk the them I am thinking good luck. But that missionary helped him at feedlot since he offered. Didn't help him become active.

    As for being the go between for things investigators need best for missionaries not to be involved but let members do that. I know of missionaries that advertise the welfare program to investigators but that is totally inappropriate as we can't use it for all our members and most of them with training don't need it.

    Asking the ward to help in rides, employment, yard work and the like I don't think is always appropriate either. As for service a media referal we received said possible service project. What was missionary thinking in telecenter.

    I did aske a member to give someone a ride from a discussio early in my mission. As main fellowshiper had conflicts with the NFL. His sundays were very valuable to him. Senior comp got on me for that.

  13. #13

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by DrumNFeather View Post
    I had a long talk with our EQ President last night to get some tips from him about how to deal with this situation. I told him that one of our elders was a real "go getter" and is asking for an exchange for every appointment. He told me that I let him be a go getter and go get his own exchange if he wants them.

    I'm just not going to call people and ask them to go out on a Friday night or Saturday afternoon. Especially when I get the request from the elders at about 5:00 PM on Friday night.

    I think that WML is one of those callings that is an "endure to the end" type calling where you just have to grin and bear it as you attempt to do your calling without putting people off.
    A couple of thoughts . . .

    1. Missionaries shouldn't be asking for help unless there is proper notice. Less than 24 hours doesn't cut it. Missionaries need to know this and plan accordingly.

    2. Annoy the members. This is required in almost all callings so just suck it up and be annoying. Most of the membership isn't as self-centered as many that post here and won't be offended. My experience is that either people can do it or they can't and they will tell you. If they get annoyed by being ask to serve then it is their problem not yours.

    3. Take advantage of ward missionaries. It is their calling to go out with the missionaries.

    4. This has to start with the leadership of the ward (like everything) and even the stake. Our Stake President (he is in my ward) goes out with the missionaries frequently. It leaves the rest of us with little excuse to not do it. If the leaders are not willing to set aside the time to help then neither will anyone else. I realize they have a lot on their plate but going out once and sharing their experience will go a long ways.

    5. Our ward holds weekly missionary committee meeting and a member of at least the HPG, EQ, and RS presidencies is present with the WML, ward missionaries, and full time missionaries. It is not long but we discuss all investigators and members that each organization is working with. I walk out of that meeting each week knowing what the missionaries need by way of help and what the EQ can do. Likewise the missionaries know how they can help us. WML follows up with emails during the week. One of the most productive meetings I have ever been a part of.

  14. #14
    Stepping Razor wuapinmon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Hartsville, South Carolina
    Posts
    24,490

    Default The Mormon Missionary Talmud

    Is it lawful for a missionary to eat dinner at your home after 6PM without an investigator? NO!

    Is it lawful for a missionary to eat dinner at your home on the weekend without an investigator? NO!

    Is it lawful for you to give a ride in a 5-seat car to a set of elders and a set of sister missionaries? NO!

    They cannot be "broken up" and must sit as companionships. The opposite gender must not come in contact with the other. So, if you're given an "assignment" you have to make two trips. Keep in mind, these missionaries have a car. That's right, they have a car.

    Seriously, these are some rules that are handed down by the independent prelate of a mission president, and we're given putative 'assignments' to drive these missionaries to meetings, but we're not allowed to have them ride in cars together. It's ridiculous and I refuse to do it anymore.

    I don't trust the missionaries. We don't know them. They are often weird and self-centered. There's no way I'm passing along the names of my friends to people who I don't know and don't trust.

    The missionary program is broken. You cannot serve if you've committed certain sins, denying the Atonement to many. You cannot serve if you're overweight, because we have an image to uphold. You cannot serve if you play video games, because who in the hell knows why.

    I'm getting fed up.
    "LDS people need to lighten up and not take religion so seriously." --CardiacCoug
    "[...]
    liberals tend to take the moral teachings of the New Testament literally and the stories figuratively while conservatives do the opposite." -- Harry Tic

  15. #15
    One man.....one pie Moliere's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    The Republic of Tejas
    Posts
    14,029

    Default Missionary "Splits/Exchanges"

    Quote Originally Posted by wuapinmon View Post
    Is it lawful for you to give a ride in a 5-seat car to a set of elders and a set of sister missionaries? NO!

    They cannot be "broken up" and must sit as companionships. The opposite gender must not come in contact with the other. So, if you're given an "assignment" you have to make two trips. Keep in mind, these missionaries have a car. That's right, they have a car.
    "Discipleship is not a spectator sport. We cannot expect to experience the blessing of faith by standing inactive on the sidelines any more than we can experience the benefits of health by sitting on a sofa watching sporting events on television and giving advice to the athletes. And yet for some, “spectator discipleship” is a preferred if not primary way of worshipping." -Pres. Uchtdorf

  16. #16

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by wuapinmon View Post
    Is it lawful for a missionary to eat dinner at your home after 6PM without an investigator? NO!

    Is it lawful for a missionary to eat dinner at your home on the weekend without an investigator? NO!

    Is it lawful for you to give a ride in a 5-seat car to a set of elders and a set of sister missionaries? NO!

    They cannot be "broken up" and must sit as companionships. The opposite gender must not come in contact with the other. So, if you're given an "assignment" you have to make two trips. Keep in mind, these missionaries have a car. That's right, they have a car.

    Seriously, these are some rules that are handed down by the independent prelate of a mission president, and we're given putative 'assignments' to drive these missionaries to meetings, but we're not allowed to have them ride in cars together. It's ridiculous and I refuse to do it anymore.

    I don't trust the missionaries. We don't know them. They are often weird and self-centered. There's no way I'm passing along the names of my friends to people who I don't know and don't trust.

    The missionary program is broken. You cannot serve if you've committed certain sins, denying the Atonement to many. You cannot serve if you're overweight, because we have an image to uphold. You cannot serve if you play video games, because who in the hell knows why.

    I'm getting fed up.
    I would just tell them to get their asses in the car and I'm all of their companions.
    Will donate kidney for B12 membership.

  17. #17
    Stepping Razor wuapinmon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Hartsville, South Carolina
    Posts
    24,490

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by The_Douger View Post
    I would just tell them to get their asses in the car and I'm all of their companions.
    Nay, nay. One of the sister missionaries wrote, "Dinner must end by 6PM" on the missionary meal calendar. That's right, she underlined it.

    They'd actually feel ennobled in refusing to do something like that. "Obedience brings blessings" never mind the fact that she is an adult in the 21st Century. If these missionaries want to have sex, good heavens, let them be responsible for the consequences of their own actions. Treating them like late-Victorian Quakers isn't going to make a bit of difference.
    "LDS people need to lighten up and not take religion so seriously." --CardiacCoug
    "[...]
    liberals tend to take the moral teachings of the New Testament literally and the stories figuratively while conservatives do the opposite." -- Harry Tic

  18. #18

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by wuapinmon View Post
    Nay, nay. One of the sister missionaries wrote, "Dinner must end by 6PM" on the missionary meal calendar. That's right, she underlined it.

    They'd actually feel ennobled in refusing to do something like that. "Obedience brings blessings" never mind the fact that she is an adult in the 21st Century. If these missionaries want to have sex, good heavens, let them be responsible for the consequences of their own actions. Treating them like late-Victorian Quakers isn't going to make a bit of difference.
    I get tired of that pious crap about the rules. In my second to last area, we led the mission in baptisms a couple months in a row, we were an older companionship, and we got up late and wore Dockers instead of suit coats like our mission president asked. My mission president told me that the people we baptized would not stick with the church and would not be blessed because we did not follow the rules. One of those families got sealed in the temple a few years later.

    There's more to missions than the rules and it's unfortunate that so many of the young people serving don't get that.

    I live in Utah. I see the missionaries about three times a year in passing. From the sound of it in some of these threads, it's probably a good thing.
    Will donate kidney for B12 membership.

  19. #19
    aka Benito Hazard thesaint258's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    My castle!
    Posts
    2,573

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by wuapinmon View Post
    Is it lawful for you to give a ride in a 5-seat car to a set of elders and a set of sister missionaries? NO!

    They cannot be "broken up" and must sit as companionships. The opposite gender must not come in contact with the other. So, if you're given an "assignment" you have to make two trips. Keep in mind, these missionaries have a car. That's right, they have a car.
    That doesn't describe my mission at all. My forward-thinking mission president started elder/sister splits because there were so few sisters and they wanted to get away from their companions, too. It had to be one elder and two sisters or vice versa.
    "We are all know stupider...I award you no points"

  20. #20

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by thesaint258 View Post
    That doesn't describe my mission at all. My forward-thinking mission president started elder/sister splits because there were so few sisters and they wanted to get away from their companions, too. It had to be one elder and two sisters or vice versa.
    That would have worked perfectly in my mission because the lookers were always companions with the sweet spirits.

  21. #21
    Senior Member Eddie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Davis County
    Posts
    3,943

    Default

    Just a thought - but if these folks don't meet the weight thresholds, what makes you think you'll be able to get 4 of them into a 5 passenger car with you?

    For the record - most of those seem like pretty silly rules. Part of me thinks (a big part of me) that we're talking about adults here. So give them some guidelines and trust them with those guidelines.

    I'm sure that there are some missionaries out there who love to hang out at member's homes - on weekends or evenings after dinner, etc. While I agree that the church doesn't need lazy missionaries - the reality is that having them around can do a great deal of good for many families. Even active ones.

    To be honest - I don't have a problem with the weight thing. I had a companion who was morbidly obese. It was difficult getting onto buses during busy hours, I had to walk S L O W L Y everywhere we went because he couldn't keep up and got winded easily. And I imagine that with the number of heath issues associated with being overweight - it is a pragmatic rule more than anything. I don't know the limits - so I hope they are reasonable. But I can agree that having them in place is probably OK.

    We've got a set of missionaries in our stake that I see all the time. Usually in the gym playing basketball. During ward ball, we have games on Friday evenings beginning at 6:30 and going until 9:30. They are there the entire time, with one of the elders playing with one ward or another. I've run into them during the week mid-day in gym shorts with some folks who were obviously not missionaries playing. They also show up during our wards "practice" night once a week (along with the other wards nights in our building).

    I was speaking with the EQP a couple of weeks ago about a family they are working with. He said he attempted to speak with the missionaries about this family a couple of times, but that they kept changing the subject and seemed more concerned with making sure they knew what days/times the EQ would be playing ball that week.

    Yeah - they don't come across as the kind of guys I would be referring my neighbors to. And with what I've seen of them - I can understand why some mission presidents would set extra rules that make them seem like unreasonable slave-drivers.

  22. #22
    Where's Wallace? Surfah's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    V to the izz-A.
    Posts
    31,853

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by thesaint258 View Post
    That doesn't describe my mission at all. My forward-thinking mission president started elder/sister splits because there were so few sisters and they wanted to get away from their companions, too. It had to be one elder and two sisters or vice versa.
    That is exactly how my mission was. As a ZL I went out with the sisters more than once.
    "Nobody listens to Turtle."
    -Turtle

  23. #23
    Senior Member The Fourth Nephite's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Sanpete County
    Posts
    759

    Default

    I've been WML for two years and it's the best calling ever. I would probably refuse if they tried to give me a different calling.

    You guys that have bad attitudes are missing out bigtime. Sharing the gospel is tits!
    "I'm going to go back to CUF now, where the censorship is less, the average IQ is higher, and we don't have to deal with so much of this nonsense. Goodbye." - SoonerCoug

  24. #24
    Signature won a Pulitzer Paperback Writer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Location
    In the Darkness on the Edge of Town
    Posts
    3,202

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Surfah View Post
    That is exactly how my mission was. As a ZL I went out with the sisters more than once.
    One of the best experiences I had on my mission was as a DL while training a new missionary. The sister companionship was in the other ward that shared the building. In hindsight, I'm almost certain that my "greenie" companion had Asperger's Syndrome but that condition was probably not diagnosed back then. I was fairly "old-school" and lacking in patience and empathy for this Elder.

    Meanwhile, the Sisters were having significant companionship problems as one was near the end of her mission and had mentally packed her bags; to pass the time she claimed to be sick. As DL, this became my problem. So the routine became to leave Sister I'm-too-sick-to-leave-the-apartment behind and me and my companion would go out and work with the other sister. She helped greatly with my companion and as we worked together I learned many tips on dealing with him. I became much less "old-school" to the benefit of everyone. We soon all became very good friends and he started referring to us as his "Ma and Pa". It ended up being one of the most productive periods of my mission with respect to teaching and baptizing.
    “Not the victory but the action. Not the goal but the game. In the deed the glory.”

  25. #25
    Stepping Razor wuapinmon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Hartsville, South Carolina
    Posts
    24,490

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Eddie View Post
    Just a thought - but if these folks don't meet the weight thresholds, what makes you think you'll be able to get 4 of them into a 5 passenger car with you?

    For the record - most of those seem like pretty silly rules. Part of me thinks (a big part of me) that we're talking about adults here. So give them some guidelines and trust them with those guidelines.

    I'm sure that there are some missionaries out there who love to hang out at member's homes - on weekends or evenings after dinner, etc. While I agree that the church doesn't need lazy missionaries - the reality is that having them around can do a great deal of good for many families. Even active ones.

    To be honest - I don't have a problem with the weight thing. I had a companion who was morbidly obese. It was difficult getting onto buses during busy hours, I had to walk S L O W L Y everywhere we went because he couldn't keep up and got winded easily. And I imagine that with the number of heath issues associated with being overweight - it is a pragmatic rule more than anything. I don't know the limits - so I hope they are reasonable. But I can agree that having them in place is probably OK.

    We've got a set of missionaries in our stake that I see all the time. Usually in the gym playing basketball. During ward ball, we have games on Friday evenings beginning at 6:30 and going until 9:30. They are there the entire time, with one of the elders playing with one ward or another. I've run into them during the week mid-day in gym shorts with some folks who were obviously not missionaries playing. They also show up during our wards "practice" night once a week (along with the other wards nights in our building).

    I was speaking with the EQP a couple of weeks ago about a family they are working with. He said he attempted to speak with the missionaries about this family a couple of times, but that they kept changing the subject and seemed more concerned with making sure they knew what days/times the EQ would be playing ball that week.

    Yeah - they don't come across as the kind of guys I would be referring my neighbors to. And with what I've seen of them - I can understand why some mission presidents would set extra rules that make them seem like unreasonable slave-drivers.
    5'10" can't weigh more than 258 lbs. And is having to walk slowly enough of an inconvenience to deny someone the blessing of serving? I'd argue that no, it's not. "If ye have desires to serve, ye are called to the work."
    "LDS people need to lighten up and not take religion so seriously." --CardiacCoug
    "[...]
    liberals tend to take the moral teachings of the New Testament literally and the stories figuratively while conservatives do the opposite." -- Harry Tic

  26. #26
    Heartless Bastard Indy Coug's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Living Large inside the 5th Circle
    Posts
    18,634

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by wuapinmon View Post
    5'10" can't weigh more than 258 lbs. And is having to walk slowly enough of an inconvenience to deny someone the blessing of serving? I'd argue that no, it's not. "If ye have desires to serve, ye are called to the work."
    Interesting, as there is a missionary in my ward right now that is probably 5'8" and at least 275.
    Everything in life is an approximation.

    http://twitter.com/CougarStats

  27. #27
    Stepping Razor wuapinmon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Hartsville, South Carolina
    Posts
    24,490

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Indy Coug View Post
    Interesting, as there is a missionary in my ward right now that is probably 5'8" and at least 275.
    Being stateside, it's very likely that he put on weight. It's left up to the "bishop's discretion" in the memo I saw. But, bishops vary.
    "LDS people need to lighten up and not take religion so seriously." --CardiacCoug
    "[...]
    liberals tend to take the moral teachings of the New Testament literally and the stories figuratively while conservatives do the opposite." -- Harry Tic

  28. #28
    Heartless Bastard Indy Coug's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Living Large inside the 5th Circle
    Posts
    18,634

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by wuapinmon View Post
    Being stateside, it's very likely that he put on weight. It's left up to the "bishop's discretion" in the memo I saw. But, bishops vary.
    I have no idea what his "starting weight" was, but he's fairly solid and has an athletic background.
    Everything in life is an approximation.

    http://twitter.com/CougarStats

  29. #29
    Senior Member Eddie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Davis County
    Posts
    3,943

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by wuapinmon View Post
    5'10" can't weigh more than 258 lbs. And is having to walk slowly enough of an inconvenience to deny someone the blessing of serving? I'd argue that no, it's not. "If ye have desires to serve, ye are called to the work."
    Having to walk slowly was an inconvenience, but I was OK with it. I really liked the guy.

    All that aside - I still believe this is a health thing. I think they've discovered that folks who are that big are more likely to have additional health issues. As a parent, I want my children taken care of and returned to me safely. I imagine there are less health issues for folks within the set height to weight ranges.

    I hope it isn't all about who can fit on a bike, etc. But I suppose there is some of that.

    As for "If ye have desires to serve, ye are called to the work." I agree. And if you have desires to serve, you should prepare yourself in order to do the work. That might mean not just studying scriptures and going to church, but dropping some lbs. too.

  30. #30
    Stepping Razor wuapinmon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Hartsville, South Carolina
    Posts
    24,490

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Eddie View Post

    As for "If ye have desires to serve, ye are called to the work." I agree. And if you have desires to serve, you should prepare yourself in order to do the work. That might mean not just studying scriptures and going to church, but dropping some lbs. too.
    That's a cop out. Preparing oneself to serve is found nowhere in the words of Jesus. He called people and they left their nets.
    "LDS people need to lighten up and not take religion so seriously." --CardiacCoug
    "[...]
    liberals tend to take the moral teachings of the New Testament literally and the stories figuratively while conservatives do the opposite." -- Harry Tic

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •