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I learned in church today

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  • Originally posted by Jeff Lebowski View Post
    Dude, I am so sorry this is happening to you.
    I'm not.
    Give 'em Hell, Cougars!!!

    For all this His anger is not turned away, but His hand is stretched out still.

    Not long ago an obituary appeared in the Salt Lake Tribune that said the recently departed had "died doing what he enjoyed most—watching BYU lose."

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    • Originally posted by Moliere View Post
      Duh. Blue darts.
      I brought a box of matches in about ten years ago, and they're still there. Every once in a while (like Sunday) I'll light a match, let it burn, then blow it out. The smoke leaves a campfire smell in the air and trumps any other smells. Yesterday the Bishop walks in and stops... I looked at him, and he looked at me, and I flicked my head towards my buddy whose face is in the computer... and he gave me a manly nod of understanding.

      Clerks offices are small for you inactive guys.

      When poet puts pen to paper imagination breathes life, finding hearth and home.
      -Mid Summer's Night Dream

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      • mbn is cold, man.
        I'm like LeBron James.
        -mpfunk

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        • Originally posted by clackamascoug View Post
          I brought a box of matches in about ten years ago, and they're still there. Every once in a while (like Sunday) I'll light a match, let it burn, then blow it out. The smoke leaves a campfire smell in the air and trumps any other smells. Yesterday the Bishop walks in and stops... I looked at him, and he looked at me, and I flicked my head towards my buddy whose face is in the computer... and he gave me a manly nod of understanding.

          Clerks offices are small for you inactive guys.
          so... what Moliere said.

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          • Originally posted by smokymountainrain View Post
            mbn is cold, man.
            So cold, at least he didn't say that he hoped that I lost a shiny because of the church WiFi issue.
            As I lead this army, make room for mistakes and depression
            --Kendrick Lamar

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            • Originally posted by MartyFunkhouser View Post
              So cold, at least he didn't say that he hoped that I lost a shiny because of the church WiFi issue.
              I mean, he's not heartless.

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              • Just had a sacrament meeting talk based on Finding Dori and how it relates to the atonement. By an adult male. It's his favorite movie.
                Ain't it like most people, I'm no different. We love to talk on things we don't know about.

                "The only one of us who is so significant that Jeff owes us something simply because he decided to grace us with his presence is falafel." -- All-American

                GIVE 'EM HELL, BRIGHAM!

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                • Originally posted by falafel View Post
                  Just had a sacrament meeting talk based on Finding Dori and how it relates to the atonement. By an adult male. It's his favorite movie.
                  playing the long game to avoid a nursery calling.
                  Te Occidere Possunt Sed Te Edere Non Possunt Nefas Est.

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                  • I learned that when the bishop calls you to be over your son's quorum activities, because your son is the only member of his quorum, you're going to be sustained as a member of the YM Presidency, even if the words "presidency" or "counselor" were never uttered during the conversation.

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                    • Originally posted by LVAllen View Post
                      I learned that when the bishop calls you to be over your son's quorum activities, because your son is the only member of his quorum, you're going to be sustained as a member of the YM Presidency, even if the words "presidency" or "counselor" were never uttered during the conversation.
                      That is great. Still hope you guys combine with another quorum.

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                      • Originally posted by LVAllen View Post
                        I learned that when the bishop calls you to be over your son's quorum activities, because your son is the only member of his quorum, you're going to be sustained as a member of the YM Presidency, even if the words "presidency" or "counselor" were never uttered during the conversation.
                        Not if you oppose.
                        τὸν ἥλιον ἀνατέλλοντα πλείονες ἢ δυόμενον προσκυνοῦσιν

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                        • Tal,omg about Joseph and Mary up and leaving, someone brought up the lesson of what if we were asked to go to Missiouri and someone randomly called out names, a few people got called some didn.t. Then someone getting back from senior mission went to church in Missiouri several Samoans there were told to move to the us by stake president. Then he questioned if it was legit. Church leaders donlt tell people to immigrate.

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                          • Yesterday, I learned that we’re not adequately preparing our missionaries for returning to normal life. We had a sister missionary who had just returned from the Denver South mission (she told us about 7 times) who obviously didn’t even realize that we now have two hour church. She was the first speaker and concluded at 10:07. The bishop stood up afterwards and said that we look forward to hearing from Brother so and so at a future time. We didn’t even have a one verse closing hymn. Straight to the prayer.


                            Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
                            I told him he was a goddamn Nazi Stormtrooper.

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                            • Originally posted by Dwight Schr-ute View Post
                              Yesterday, I learned that we’re not adequately preparing our missionaries for returning to normal life. We had a sister missionary who had just returned from the Denver South mission (she told us about 7 times) who obviously didn’t even realize that we now have two hour church. She was the first speaker and concluded at 10:07. The bishop stood up afterwards and said that we look forward to hearing from Brother so and so at a future time. We didn’t even have a one verse closing hymn. Straight to the prayer.
                              Other than her repeating the name of the mission so many times, was it a good talk and worth the time?

                              Comment


                              • I learned in church today

                                Originally posted by mtnbiker View Post
                                Other than her repeating the name of the mission so many times, was it a good talk and worth the time?
                                Not it wasn’t. The whole thing was like 25 minutes of her stream of consciousness. It was nice when little pieces of her mission language poked through, like when she said, “We had this investigator that we were really stoked about.” That made it a little more interesting. Mostly it was just confusing and disappointing, though. When she got choked up introducing herself, I knew we were in for it.


                                Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
                                I told him he was a goddamn Nazi Stormtrooper.

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