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My mother's been six feet underground since 2000, you dick! When exactly did you show her this banana? WHEN?!
Summer 1998, Provo, Roman Gardens #335. Don't you remember how impressed she was by my "pretty nifty" banana sticker collection? She always wanted to see my Chiquita one, but I told her that Bob was her husband and not a verb.
"Yeah, but never trust a Ph.D who has an MBA as well. The PhD symbolizes intelligence and discipline. The MBA symbolizes lust for power." -- Katy Lied
Summer 1998, Provo, Roman Gardens #335. Don't you remember how impressed she was by my "pretty nifty" banana sticker collection? She always wanted to see my Chiquita one, but I told her that Bob was her husband and not a verb.
No, my sweet mother Connie did NOT think your Chiquita was "swell," you pervert. I'll be damned if I let you talk about her that way! Just be on your way, smarty art-boy. You're irrelevant here. And steer clear of Desert Memorial Park next time you're in California, you sick bastard. SICK! You're SICK! I HATE YOU!
I'd ask for my king-sized mattress back but Mickelle told me you were visited by Montezuma's revenge after you returned from Costa Rica. SICK! You're SICK!
Summer 1998, Provo, Roman Gardens #335. Don't you remember how impressed she was by my "pretty nifty" banana sticker collection? She always wanted to see my Chiquita one, but I told her that Bob was her husband and not a verb.
No, my sweet mother Connie did NOT think your Chiquita was "swell," you pervert. I'll be damned if I let you talk about her that way! Just be on your way, smarty art-boy. You're irrelevant here. And steer clear of Desert Memorial Park next time you're in California, you sick bastard. SICK! You're SICK! I HATE YOU!
I'd ask for my king-sized mattress back but Mickelle told me you were visited by Montezuma's revenge after you returned from Costa Rica. SICK! You're SICK!
PS: You can keep the TV. I used it to look at Wuap Family Home Videos once and I fear that it's now forever tainted with the residue of your grits-loving ilk. Keep it.
No, my sweet mother Connie did NOT think your Chiquita was "swell," you pervert. I'll be damned if I let you talk about her that way! Just be on your way, smarty art-boy. You're irrelevant here. And steer clear of Desert Memorial Park next time you're in California, you sick bastard. SICK! You're SICK! I HATE YOU!
How long's it been since you wrote something on CUF that people are actually going to agree with? It's been awhile, huh? If they don't agree with you, are you going to tell them that they should all go back to CG?
I'd ask for my king-sized mattress back but Mickelle told me you were visited by Montezuma's revenge after you returned from Costa Rica. SICK! You're SICK!
Wait, does YOUR wife know that you've been talking to MY wife without our knowledge? And my Moctezuma's revenge stain makes a nice pair with your Mango Lassi India "accident."
PS: You can keep the TV. I used it to look at Wuap Family Home Videos once and I fear that it's now forever tainted with the residue of your grits-loving ilk. Keep it.
You sonofabitch! Those kids love you. I hope your fugu has intestinal residue. Just make sure your wife doesn't eat any of it. She's actually worth keeping around, and I bet your wife likes grits, so eat a banana, "green wood."
Your last name was truly apropos until this month.
"Yeah, but never trust a Ph.D who has an MBA as well. The PhD symbolizes intelligence and discipline. The MBA symbolizes lust for power." -- Katy Lied
You sonofabitch! Those kids love you. I hope your fugu has intestinal residue. Just make sure your wife doesn't eat any of it. She's actually worth keeping around, and I bet your wife likes grits, so eat a banana, "green wood."
Better a poisoned fish than Thanksgiving at your house again.
Your last name was truly apropos until this month.
DAMN YOU! Not all of us are able to order a wife over the internet, Mac. Don't forget that.
PS: Che Guevara called. He wants his dirty beard back.
Better a poisoned fish than Thanksgiving at your house again.
You leaving our house that day was one of the best things that ever happened to me. My wife was so excited that you were leaving and not spending the night, that she jumped my bones and we made sweet sweet love. Late November 2007 - August 5, 2008 = Calliope was born. So, seeing your taillights brought the stork calling. You truly bring great joy when you leave somewhere.
You leaving our house that day was one of the best things that ever happened to me. My wife was so excited that you were leaving and not spending the night, that she jumped my bones and we made sweet sweet love. Late November 2007 - August 5, 2008 = Calliope was born. So, seeing your taillights brought the stork calling. You truly bring great joy when you leave somewhere.
My 24 hours of freedom was more enjoyable than your 30 seconds of "fun."
What was that about it never working? I at least am classy enough to lie to you.
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