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  • The LDS poetry thread

    INTRO:

    This is Jeff Lebowski, not HFN. DDD and YOhio started a promising hijack with LDS poetry inside a Christmas thread. I decided to split the related posts into a new thread (partly just to see how one goes about splitting a thread - it's not easy, BTW).

    Since HFN started the thread, I have to leave his post here (I copied the thread and then deleted some posts). If I delete HFN's post, it deletes the entire thread. So my apologies to HFN. (This is HFN, no apologies necessary Dude.)

    Carry on.
    Last edited by HuskyFreeNorthwest; 12-12-2008, 10:57 AM.
    Get confident, stupid
    -landpoke

  • #2
    Originally posted by Teenage Dirtbag View Post
    I am sad that your poem didn't make the cut. Please post it here, so that all may enjoy.
    I figured this one would be a shoe-in for the LDS Poetry section of the Ensign:

    Parley Parker Pratt...so many P's!
    Multiple wives....so many V's!

    Mission to Chile, you didn't feel silly
    When the Millenial Star was burned to a char
    Or was it Times and Seasons? I forget the reasons

    The G known as PPP
    Had a beef with Hector
    Now Parley is a specter

    But his spirit lives on today
    Mitt Romney has his DNA
    And there's a little PPP in you and in me
    And on the building at the back of the MTC
    Fitter. Happier. More Productive.

    sigpic

    Comment


    • #3
      I wish there was an online archive of The Friend. I had a poem published at age 7 that, I'm certain, would bring a tear to they eye of even the most hardened soul.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by TripletDaddy
        I figured this one would be a shoe-in for the LDS Poetry section of the Ensign:

        Parley Parker Pratt...so many P's!
        Multiple wives....so many V's!

        Mission to Chile, you didn't feel silly
        When the Millenial Star was burned to a char
        Or was it Times and Seasons? I forget the reasons

        The G known as PPP
        Had a beef with Hector
        Now Parley is a specter

        But his spirit lives on today
        Mitt Romney has his DNA
        And there's a little PPP in you and in me
        And on the building at the back of the MTC
        That was awesome! My John C. Bennett poem was rejected.

        Dr. John C. Bennett was a hero of his age
        Mayor of his town and he lobbied Honest Abe
        But the mockers will mock and the haters will hate
        And they all blame him when the ladies are late

        He hated crime and deplored thuggery
        And there is no proof of purported buggery
        He also was the General of the Nauvoo Legion
        And his little general had no lesions

        A playa will play and he won't change
        So he headed up North to hang with the Strang
        So there on Beaver Island he was meant to be
        And he convinced the sisters to play polygamy

        So it is quite clear that John C. Bennett
        Was a pretty great guy and always up in it
        His rep is clear as a crystal bell
        And all his critics can go to Utah

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by SteelBlue
          I wish there was an online archive of The Friend. I had a poem published at age 7 that, I'm certain, would bring a tear to they eye of even the most hardened soul.
          Is this it?

          Our grandpa’s bees
          each have six knees,
          They really are
          humdingers—
          Real busy things with
          buzzy wings,
          And great big shiny
          STINGERS!

          The Friend 1977


          Or this

          This is Mary.
          This is Joseph.
          This is their donkey gray.
          This is the town of Bethlehem where they would like to stay.
          This is the stable.
          This is a manger by a cattle stall.
          This is the Baby Jesus, the Savior of us all.
          This is an angel.
          This is a shepherd.
          This is a brand new star.
          Later would come the wise men, traveling from afar.
          This is the very first Christmas that anyone did keep,
          In honor of Baby Jesus—
          Shhh! He’s fallen asleep.

          Friend 1977

          I hope its the first.

          You realize there is an online archive of the friend, right?

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by YOhio
            He hated crime and deplored thuggery
            And there is no proof of purported buggery
            He also was the General of the Nauvoo Legion
            And his little general had no lesions
            I just don't get why these great poems are getting rejected.
            Fitter. Happier. More Productive.

            sigpic

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by TripletDaddy
              I figured this one would be a shoe-in for the LDS Poetry section of the Ensign:

              Parley Parker Pratt...so many P's!
              Multiple wives....so many V's!

              I got this far before busting up laughing. I was laughing hard enough that my daughter came over to look at the laptop to see what was so funny. Luckily she can't read.
              Prepare to put mustard on those words, for you will soon be consuming them, along with this slice of humble pie that comes direct from the oven of shame set at gas mark “egg on your face”! -- Moss

              There are three rules that I live by: never get less than twelve hours sleep; never play cards with a guy who has the same first name as a city; and never get involved with a woman with a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, and everything else is cream cheese. --Coach Finstock

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by pelagius
                Is this it?

                Our grandpa’s bees
                each have six knees,
                They really are
                humdingers—
                Real busy things with
                buzzy wings,
                And great big shiny
                STINGERS!

                The Friend 1977


                Or this

                This is Mary.
                This is Joseph.
                This is their donkey gray.
                This is the town of Bethlehem where they would like to stay.
                This is the stable.
                This is a manger by a cattle stall.
                This is the Baby Jesus, the Savior of us all.
                This is an angel.
                This is a shepherd.
                This is a brand new star.
                Later would come the wise men, traveling from afar.
                This is the very first Christmas that anyone did keep,
                In honor of Baby Jesus—
                Shhh! He’s fallen asleep.

                Friend 1977

                I hope its the first.

                You realize there is an online archive of the friend, right?
                I find the archive, but I don't see the children's submissions anywhere.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by SteelBlue
                  I find the archive, but I don't see the children's submissions anywhere.
                  You're right ... I didn't check that. The scary thing is that implies that the above poems were written by adults.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by TripletDaddy
                    I figured this one would be a shoe-in for the LDS Poetry section of the Ensign:

                    Parley Parker Pratt...so many P's!
                    Multiple wives....so many V's!

                    Mission to Chile, you didn't feel silly
                    When the Millenial Star was burned to a char
                    Or was it Times and Seasons? I forget the reasons

                    The G known as PPP
                    Had a beef with Hector
                    Now Parley is a specter

                    But his spirit lives on today
                    Mitt Romney has his DNA
                    And there's a little PPP in you and in me
                    And on the building at the back of the MTC
                    Sometimes I swear your are a genius.
                    Get confident, stupid
                    -landpoke

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by TripletDaddy
                      I figured this one would be a shoe-in for the LDS Poetry section of the Ensign:

                      Parley Parker Pratt...so many P's!
                      Multiple wives....so many V's!

                      Mission to Chile, you didn't feel silly
                      When the Millenial Star was burned to a char
                      Or was it Times and Seasons? I forget the reasons

                      The G known as PPP
                      Had a beef with Hector
                      Now Parley is a specter

                      But his spirit lives on today
                      Mitt Romney has his DNA
                      And there's a little PPP in you and in me
                      And on the building at the back of the MTC
                      Truly a shame this is buried mid-thread. I just read it aloud for reaction, and the poem was received with a far better reaction than I could have dreamed. Up there with the campaign buttons to wear to church.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by YOhio
                        That was awesome! My John C. Bennett poem was rejected.

                        Dr. John C. Bennett was a hero of his age
                        Mayor of his town and he lobbied Honest Abe
                        But the mockers will mock and the haters will hate
                        And they all blame him when the ladies are late

                        He hated crime and deplored thuggery
                        And there is no proof of purported buggery
                        He also was the General of the Nauvoo Legion
                        And his little general had no lesions

                        A playa will play and he won't change
                        So he headed up North to hang with the Strang
                        So there on Beaver Island he was meant to be
                        And he convinced the sisters to play polygamy

                        So it is quite clear that John C. Bennett
                        Was a pretty great guy and always up in it
                        His rep is clear as a crystal bell
                        And all his critics can go to Utah
                        Hey, you made something!

                        Seriously, that was hilarious. Ditto for DDD. We should move these to a new thread and see if we can get something started.
                        "There is no creature more arrogant than a self-righteous libertarian on the web, am I right? Those folks are just intolerable."
                        "It's no secret that the great American pastime is no longer baseball. Now it's sanctimony." -- Guy Periwinkle, The Nix.
                        "Juilliardk N I ibuprofen Hyu I U unhurt u" - creekster

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          I am partial to Haiku.

                          Porter's Lament

                          Shhh... There sits Mr. Boggs.
                          Exterminate this, tough guy!
                          Dammit. I missed him.
                          "There is no creature more arrogant than a self-righteous libertarian on the web, am I right? Those folks are just intolerable."
                          "It's no secret that the great American pastime is no longer baseball. Now it's sanctimony." -- Guy Periwinkle, The Nix.
                          "Juilliardk N I ibuprofen Hyu I U unhurt u" - creekster

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            A Calling Extended

                            Serve as YM pres?
                            That's like the nursery job,
                            Plus cars and hormones.
                            "There is no creature more arrogant than a self-righteous libertarian on the web, am I right? Those folks are just intolerable."
                            "It's no secret that the great American pastime is no longer baseball. Now it's sanctimony." -- Guy Periwinkle, The Nix.
                            "Juilliardk N I ibuprofen Hyu I U unhurt u" - creekster

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Jeff Lebowski
                              Hey, you made something!

                              Seriously, that was hilarious. Ditto for DDD. We should move these to a new thread and see if we can get something started.
                              See? Look what I started! (I'll take credit for anything I can )

                              Hey gentlemen! Good work all around. Even Lebowski's lame Haiku made me chuckle. Better than a new thread, we should start a new category! The poetry of CUF. That would be one hell of a way to distinguish this page from all of the other Cougar/Ute/Sports/LDS boards out there. It would become absolutely legendary!

                              Seriously Jeff. You should think about it.

                              Comment

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